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Personally, I feel there is this misconception about being in a relationship to fulfill or complete each other. From personal experiences, I think it is scary when 2 persons are in a relationship, and they look to each other to fulfill whatever that is lacking emotionally in their lives. My fear is, should the relationship ends, does that mean one party or both becomes incomplete again? And they both have to go on that never ending quest to seek what's missing in their lives? Over the years I have come to recognise this: to be in a relationship, one has to be complete within oneself first. Forget about the "You complete me..." Jerry McGuire b/s. You have to feel secure about yourself and be confident about it knowing that if you meet that special someone, he is the guy who is not going to complete you, but he is going to compliment you, make you a better man. Do you want to be with somebody whom you have to call 2x a day txt 20x expressing how you feel about each other in order to feel secure and emotionally connected? You got to believe in yourself first, then he and others will believe in you.

That's why you are not.

my cousin's in a monogamous relationship with his boyfriend, coming 21 years already. 21 years, what a mark of a coming of age. what he told me years back when i asked about his relationship sorta influenced my perception and receptivity of a relationship. there werent any special harsh words, just a scenario he painted to me while we were peeing at a toilet at maxwell food court. "well, your siblings will get married and have their families. your parents wouldnt be with you forever. would you, when that day comes, want to be one of them (pointing at two uncles at the urinal) and still having to cruise for a little thrill when your hair's gone white or bald? when all the jizz fizzles, you'll still go back home and face the walls and sleep in that bed alone. just one fine day, you might not wake up anymore in that bed and no one might even know you're gone." that sorta shook me a little. i dont think i would like to live in solitude, having no one to share a life with and age with. granted, as many have said, you can continue sleeping with merely lust; no love involved. but doesnt it sorta insult the sanctity of real love? if you love someone, arent you meant for that person exlusively? i cant imagine how you can bear to share you lover with someone in bed; what makes him? a sexual commodity off the streets of geylang? what about the risk you're exposing your partner to when you have multiple sex partners? well claim as you might about the protection measures you take, but what if you really contract hiv? besides the cocktail remedy to undertake, life with your partner will be disrupted. no sharing of utensils, mugs, bodily fluids. i think humans cook loads of excuses to justify their actions. in their favour.

Coat with ice-cream? Lol.

It boils down to whether a person's sense of belonging is strong. What is belongings depend on how you look into the future. Straight couple have kids and their kids are their future which comes with all sort of blessings into their life until death. Most gay could not foresee their future, they wanders in their thought and choose not to think beyond their productive years. Unlike straight couple, gay has restricted choice in life to the extend that they wouldn't want further imprisonment (by family, friends or whatever). To them, the sky is their limit. This group belongs to the explorers, strayed on the street, some with limited means seeking numerous adventures. They wanted to fill their sex life to the maxim and are too restless to stop - time is too short for proper relationship - and they thought they have nothing to lose in the end. On the other hand, there are also another group of gay who prefer a "normal family" life. They wanted to see what the straight people can see and feel. Thus they wanted this kind of life - where they can finally come "home" with a serious gay relationship. This group, are the type whom, I believe, are the financially sound or higher educated lot and prefer to be closeted and lead a fruitful life. Partly, they also came from a disciplined and well cultured family background. They are the settler. Prove me if I am wrong.

pick up your hp and call him direct.

if i m da boss n i know u r gay, i wont f*cking employ u.

First, welcome to the real world, guess you are still growing up. Second, please don't be too idealistic and judgmental.