Strangers in my Head : Guy with Body Dismorphic Disorder

[tomcat]

Poor guy, what a struggle for him, his daily life...

 

Youthful and outgoing, one can hardly tell that Le Yong battles with a mental health issue. Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is an under-diagnosed condition, characterised by obsessive and intrusive thoughts of perceived flaws in a person’s appearance. Unaware of this mental health disorder at an earlier age, Le Yong has had cosmetic surgeries to correct his perceived flaws. However, surgery has not fixed his body image issues.

Every day, Le Yong needs to make an extra effort to manage the distorted image he sees of himself and the feelings of shame for having these obsessive and ‘vain’ thoughts. As he feels the pressure to measure up to society’s standards of what it means to be normal and the perceived expectations of what a man should achieve, Le Yong dreams of a simple life free from BDD.

[auscent]

One of my frens has mental health issues.

She immersed in volunteer work with domestic helpers; their legal problems and rights. All while learning to fix her own issues. An excellent way to handle mental issues is to divert energy into more positive areas.

[Blogger Adam]

thanks for sharing this clip. i'm very moved.

[Guest Kidd]

He's actually quite good looking though

[Guest guest]

Any type of mental health issues have a great impact on a person daily life. Esp if the issue is taking control over your life. First time i heard of such mental health issue, BDD. I always hear OCD and anxiety type of mental health issues and it is common in many people.

[fly360]

He smokes.. too much.

[FattChoy]

The viewers can't tell the severity of his condition as they haven't seen his face prior to surgery. 

 

I do think the cna video is ten times longer than necessary. They need better editing skills.  See example below.

 

https://www3.nhk.or.jp/nhkworld/en/ondemand/video/9999427/

 

Edited January 10, 2021 by FattChoy

[tomcat]

  On 1/10/2021 at 7:55 AM, FattChoy said:

The viewers can't tell the severity of his condition as they haven't seen his face prior to surgery. 

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he only did nose so far, his original face as a teen shown, timestamp - 8:56

[Guest STB]

  On 1/10/2021 at 6:09 PM, tomcat said:

 

he only did nose so far, his original face as a teen shown, timestamp - 8:56

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I feel that he looked perfectly fine before he did his nose. Yes, he became more handsome after the nose job, but he wasn't ugly or unattractive before.

I wonder if it was social media that caused or aggravated his disorder. Instagram is full of pictures of people with perfect skin, beautiful hair, attractive features. It tends to skew people's views of beauty to unrealistic expectations.

Some days I too, feel a little upset and wish I could get the imperfections on my face fixed, but I soon get over it.

[upshot]

There are a lot more mental cases walking among us than we think. Many are so mild that you hardly will see it till they flip or do it in subtle ways that you might not notice. Mentally ill is NOT LIKE what you see in Movies or TV drama. They are not all exaggerated behaviour. That is on the far end of the mentally ill spectrum and when you swing the other way, you have the extreme hard to tell... like OCD. Medical establishment usually do not do much for these and some nation have even forgo looking after or treating them. In the US they use suppressive drugs or medication to dumb or dull down those psychotic mental spike.

 

Medication does not help much as the solution. Some do deserve to be locked up but are not as there are too few hospitals willing to do that and waste money. Why? Most has no cure. So it's more a Prison stay situation, keeping them lock up but who is going to pay for this? And there are those with family who can't accept it who would seek to medicate them hoping it keeps them in control and NOT stress the whole family. But these medicated people walk among us and we have no idea of their medical condition. And without their family telling them to take their medication, some stop taking the pill since they felt fine that day and suddenly we see Mr Tan who all this time was a friendly peaceful guy from Accounting dept now going ape-shit crazy on everyone at the office over a broken pencil he owns, for example of a scenario.  That's the short bit on mental illness. There are among us some born with it and some came about from various factors that brought them over the edge like modern social problems, upbringing, influences and high stress, perversions.. etc. Many factors can cause mental problems or makes worst.

 

I personally recognise this as I live with a family member who is Bipolar. No cure. Gets worst with age and he needs his meds. From this I also know good doctors and help are rare in Singapore or as advance as some Western countries. You almost can not claim medical assistance on this too. And when he is off his meds.. those are days I hate him the most. Imagine a guy shouting at the top of his lung for hours on end till your whole flat block can hear it, see him get out of the house to scream at people and talking to invisible people all over. And to get him back to a dull numb stage where he is more human, it will take months. If you guys heard about the Kanye West thingy with the President bid... he is Bipolar. Which was why I saw the signs when he started coming out with this support Trump President and listen to him talk and notice all the tell-tale signs.

 

At that time many thought he was a genius and is the right person for President. He is a Billionaire and he has bipolar. Bipolar does not mean you are a retard. You can be a smart billionaire but still have this mental problem. You just have to manage it like WOLFMAN. Lock up in cage when full moon. Release when it is not.  I know his family and his wife were behind the scene helping him and getting on media to try to calm things down without saying too much about it but in the end they will have to come out with it. Bipolar if you do not know it might seem to make that person sound like some brilliant person with great ideas and thought.. and to some extent it accidentally worked in Kanye way. That is before it crash. So people like that can still function, but you have to monitor them all the time. Kanye got that way with his President bid because he likely went off his meds and that flipped his mental state. Now the rumour of wife wanting to divorce him? As I said, it gets worst with age. SO I know where my family member will be in the years to come, and he is already older than me. Okay enough about Kanye.

 

You read some 'so-call' kinky stuff in BW, can anyone tell me with a straight face SOME OF THESE GUYS are not playing with a full deck of cards or are indulging in their psychotic madness in BW. There are sexual kinks or fetishes I can enjoy or encourage but what some of these people want to do is just not right. Even perversion has limits of good taste and concern. I can tell you we have mental cases here. As I have always said, BW is a lighting rod that attracts all kinds of people.. it is NOT EXCLUSIVELY a gay forum in the purest form by more than half, easily in my view...it attracts its share of socially damaging individuals as well as the good harmless lot. Str8 are not the only class of people who are crazy, abusive and hostile.. your so call LGBTQ has its own fair share too.

 

A ranting Looney like me is harmless to all but beware the ones that do more than talk but start to get into acts of danger to themselves and others. They are my concern in BW and I worry what they might end up encouraging newbies to do. And newbies thinks they are the real gurus at their kinks and not just a whack job.

 

But remember also, not all mental problems are a danger to society. The only way is to not avoid the topic but confront it head on and solve it.

Edited January 10, 2021 by upshot

[Guest Perplexed]

  On 1/9/2021 at 8:17 AM, Guest Kidd said:

He's actually quite good looking though

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Yes, I agree he is not bad looking (looks a bit like loo zihan), and dress up quite well and even has earrings and tattoo. He is also very lucky to have a close friend that genuinely cares for him. So quite perplexed what caused him to think he is ugly? There are more really "uglier" people and they still suck it up and get on with life.

[Guest He is cute]

Le Yong is cute 

perfectly alright

don’t think so much Le Yong

i am moved by your story but I think you think too much!

move on and you are cute! 

[Guest guest]

  On 1/10/2021 at 11:36 PM, Guest Perplexed said:

Yes, I agree he is not bad looking (looks a bit like loo zihan), and dress up quite well and even has earrings and tattoo. He is also very lucky to have a close friend that genuinely cares for him. So quite perplexed what caused him to think he is ugly? There are more really "uglier" people and they still suck it up and get on with life.

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I guess he himself also want to live the same as other people without having this disorder. But many times really not easy to overcome it and even doctor also don't know the cause and cure for mental related illness.

 

I myself have anxiety issue which does not cure completely once i have this issue few years ago. Sometimes it really affect me but since then i have learn to manage it better and continue with my life.

[tomcat]

  On 1/10/2021 at 11:36 PM, Guest Perplexed said:

So quite perplexed what caused him to think he is ugly?

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there are two components -  environment and chemical.

 

environmental factor, maybe he was bullied or highlighted for something. and then his brain latched onto this.

this is where the "mental disorder" element comes in, some people are predispositioned to have chemical imbalances that affect them. 

 

but it is so hard diagnose especially with invisible ailments like Le Yong. he mentioned in the video that he self-diagnosed first and then went to seek help. 

 

 

 

[tomcat]

  On 1/10/2021 at 6:40 PM, Guest STB said:

I wonder if it was social media that caused or aggravated his disorder. Instagram is full of pictures of people with perfect skin, beautiful hair, attractive features. It tends to skew people's views of beauty to unrealistic expectations.

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yeah, he mentioned in the video that he keep "checking" his face against that of celebrities.

but if it was late teens, i'm not sure social media was already around back then. these days, of course social media definitely aggravates.

 

i am sure many young people, would feel this pressure to measure up. my young cousins are already working out at 14 or 15!

and gay guys have it double hard - you have to work on both your face and body to be considered attractive. i am guilty of that too!

[Guest Guest]

I watched this on CNA earlier.

 

Initially i was thinking - what is wrong with this guy? Already look okay but keep thinking he does not look okay?

 

But since its a condition, i guess we can never really understand whats going on in his mind everyday. Probably a really bad struggle. 
 

And im surprised he agreed to show himself on TV, probably took him alot of courage, not sure if he will regret though. The way i see it, he hasn’t really completely accepted himself.

[Guest guest]

A lot of AJ have BDD. Mostly obsessed with getting perfect bodies. Even those who are already buff af still think they are too fat or scrawny.

[suckmegood]

What an awesome awareness video. 

 

To Le Yong (you probably not seeing this), you look great and perfectly fine-looking young man. Keep up with the therapies and treatments and you will overcome this issue. 加油!

[Guest Guest]

  On 1/12/2021 at 4:36 AM, Guest guest said:

A lot of AJ have BDD. Mostly obsessed with getting perfect bodies. Even those who are already buff af still think they are too fat or scrawny.

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this is not BDD.

this is super hiao.

his case is not normal already, need clinical attention.

[tomcat]

  On 1/12/2021 at 6:38 AM, suckmegood said:

What an awesome awareness video. 

 

To Le Yong (you probably not seeing this), you look great and perfectly fine-looking young man. Keep up with the therapies and treatments and you will overcome this issue. 加油!

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yup agree. i think he looks good, definitely above average, he even has a bod that shows he works out. he looks so happy chatting with his best friend, i think his friend help him to forget his problems for a while. 

 

one thing i found odd was his psychological treatment? his psychologists insist that he is a "normal person just having a distressing experience". isn't this a form of denial? the first step to any problem is Acceptance, shouldn't they teach Le Yong to accept that he is in fact different, and his journey through his obstacles is unique to himself, and that is the thing to focus on, rather than keep comparing himself. 

 

if they keep telling him that he is "normal", he will keep measuring himself against normal society standards, not just in terms of looks, but also capabilities. it broke my heart when he compared himself against his best friend's achievements, got career, car and girlfriend, and he has nothing to show for his 28 years of life. i wonder how helpful is the therapy in changing his mental framing of himself...

having said that, Le Yong is still in a good place compared to other sufferers. he has the support of his family, who looks to be doing well in a mansionette house. he does not have the urgency of having to support himself or his parents. his cosmetic procedures, which would cost some money, also seem to be paid by his family, as no medical board or insurance policy would authorise and cover such expenses. even though he was exempted from NS and is unable to keep a constant job, he still seems to be well taken care of, well clothed and fed. 

 

 

[Guest guest]

I always don't find psychological treatment is effective, many times still depend on the person himself to overcome the disorder. If the person cannot do it, no one is able to help. Like my anxiety case, also went for psychological treatment but what the psychologist told me, all i can find from the web, doesn't help much. In the end it is myself who help myself to overcome it.

[Guest Guest]

  On 1/13/2021 at 2:56 PM, Guest guest said:

I always don't find psychological treatment is effective, many times still depend on the person himself to overcome the disorder. If the person cannot do it, no one is able to help. Like my anxiety case, also went for psychological treatment but what the psychologist told me, all i can find from the web, doesn't help much. In the end it is myself who help myself to overcome it.

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Yeah. Psychological treatment is just counselling, trying to teach you to see things from a different, more positive angle. Unless drugs is prescribed due to chemical imbalance. Think his case is vanity, and then he keeps dwelling on it and refuses to let go which probably arises from being too pampered by his family where he always gets what he wants. Had he been born in a lower SES family  where he has to face hardship since young, I doubt he will have this BDD condition.

[Guest guest]

  On 1/14/2021 at 12:17 AM, Guest Guest said:

Yeah. Psychological treatment is just counselling, trying to teach you to see things from a different, more positive angle. Unless drugs is prescribed due to chemical imbalance. Think his case is vanity, and then he keeps dwelling on it and refuses to let go which probably arises from being too pampered by his family where he always gets what he wants. Had he been born in a lower SES family  where he has to face hardship since young, I doubt he will have this BDD condition.

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Hard to say what causes person to have BDD. Same to others mental disorder, even you ask the experts, they also cannot provide an answer.