funky beaver Posted February 16, 2024 Report Share Posted February 16, 2024 I am really curious about this, that is, how many found their partner using non-online method. Which means, no apps, no websites, no IRC, no forums, no social media, (you get the idea). Those that found their partner via schools, workplaces, societies, traditional match making, speed datings, care to share your experience? For the others, you can also share your thoughts if this non-online thing will work or not. (Perhaps me myself watched too much BL, wondering if this can happen in real life) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted February 16, 2024 Report Share Posted February 16, 2024 I found the partner of my life, one of the most wonderful persons I ever knew, in a sleazy gay bar in Houston. So... it was NOT in a church! There may be some advice about where one should find and not find a decent partner. Forget it! The place we find our partner is the same place WE are at the time. 😄 funky beaver and ktq 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MasterFitMalaySG4U Posted February 16, 2024 Report Share Posted February 16, 2024 I did share in 1-2 threads before before the involve of the technology (apps) I make use of apps even this forum to organize coffee ☕ sessions with donuts I bought for those who come...at first 1-3 sessions only few cames till I have about 20-30plus people at one time when it is so overwhelmed n they came from all walks of life from uni to JC to ite to working world to nsf. As a organizer you have to lead regardless of how many came...and even organize leisure sports games & clubbing too...this is one way to bond friendship etc... I might wanna try to organize a hangout session at sg river next Friday. Free & easy. Come n mingle but not to judge. Everyone of us have flaws...come with open mind n heart. Don't judge too quickly. Sometimes some just need an listening ear or their rants it does. funky beaver, max001, Steve5380 and 1 other 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post doncoin Posted February 16, 2024 Popular Post Report Share Posted February 16, 2024 With my exes, I met them through social settings, mostly at parties and events. Parties are a great way to meet guys as they are usually friends with the host or friends of friends of the host. If there is someone you are interested in, you can always ask the host about the person, or the host can approach the friend who brought him as a +1, to learn more about the guy before you introduce yourself to him. It is more fun definitely to flirt in person than via a chat app and less of the whole catfish situation. Rolling_Hafi, AgentFit, mate69 and 2 others 4 1 Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky beaver Posted February 17, 2024 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2024 9 hours ago, MasterFitMalaySG4U said: As a organizer you have to lead regardless of how many came...and even organize leisure sports games & clubbing too...this is one way to bond friendship etc... It is lucky to meet this kind of person in the LGBT circle. I also recently met a person who likes to organize activities for their circle of friends. It is the right thing for use to support one another Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 17, 2024 Report Share Posted February 17, 2024 (edited) Strangely, I met most of my bfs in public transport (don't laugh). Another in a public swimming pool here. It mostly boiled down on getting into someone's sight and developing an interest into each other. Social circles (gay sport groups, leisure activities) surely help to get to know other guys in non sexual settings. In those public space and bumping into someone settings it is very important to exchange numbers. Don't be shy to ask! Edited February 17, 2024 by singalion Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted February 17, 2024 Report Share Posted February 17, 2024 Swimming pool for me. Prefer meeting guys face-to-face. Although gay bars and Pink Dot may be too intense of an atmosphere so I prefer to stay away from those. Anyway, I had a bad experience once when a guy used a fake photo before meeting me, and did not acknowledge it at all during the meet-up. Not a great first impression. I left after our meal and never contacted him again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky beaver Posted February 17, 2024 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2024 12 hours ago, singalion said: Strangely, I met most of my bfs in public transport (don't laugh). Another in a public swimming pool here. It mostly boiled down on getting into someone's sight and developing an interest into each other. Social circles (gay sport groups, leisure activities) surely help to get to know other guys in non sexual settings. In those public space and bumping into someone settings it is very important to exchange numbers. Don't be shy to ask! Really need to be very thick skin to ask for number. I think Asian people are generally shy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Runner Posted February 17, 2024 Report Share Posted February 17, 2024 I met my boyfriend in the most unexpected place: a famous cruising park at night. Our eyes met, and sparks flew. I'm not the type to chase romantic stories. Love just happens for me, whether it's in a sauna, a park, or by the pool, without any expectation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 12 hours ago, funky beaver said: Really need to be very thick skin to ask for number. I think Asian people are generally shy. Why thick skinned? If someone is interested in you vice versa, then you intend to get to know the other. In public transport settings you won't always have time. The other might rush to work or to an event etc. exchanging numbers is the best way to get to know the other. I think this "Asians are shy" is a myth nowadays and outdated. Yes, there might be terribly shy guys but it has nothing to do with ethnic background. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
repressednerd Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 I seen a lot of couples get together via non-online method, like going for friends gatherings etc. Though there's probably an online element, where they probably entered the circle initially via an online method i.e. forums, IRC etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tate Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 15 hours ago, Guest Runner said: I met my boyfriend in the most unexpected place: a famous cruising park at night. Our eyes met, and sparks flew. I'm not the type to chase romantic stories. Love just happens for me, whether it's in a sauna, a park, or by the pool, without any expectation. How do u know he is str8 or gay? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 21 hours ago, funky beaver said: Really need to be very thick skin to ask for number. I think Asian people are generally shy. Well said! 8 hours ago, singalion said: Why thick skinned? If someone is interested in you vice versa, then you intend to get to know the other. In public transport settings you won't always have time. The other might rush to work or to an event etc. exchanging numbers is the best way to get to know the other. I think this "Asians are shy" is a myth nowadays and outdated. Yes, there might be terribly shy guys but it has nothing to do with ethnic background. That's why any of your words cannot be taken seriously. Your suggestions here can really cause so much personal damage to those who listen to you. Don't you know that Singapore is still in general a conservative place? How would you know "If someone is interested in you"? Your gaydar is 100% correct? Seriously, what if you are wrong? What if that person starts going around telling people that the creepy you is going around trying to hook up men? Of course you won't care, would you? This is not your country, and at worse you pack your bags and go home while the locals clear up your SHIT. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 (edited) 7 hours ago, Guest Guest said: That's why any of your words cannot be taken seriously. Your suggestions here can really cause so much personal damage to those who listen to you. Don't you know that Singapore is still in general a conservative place? How would you know "If someone is interested in you"? Your gaydar is 100% correct? Seriously, what if you are wrong? What if that person starts going around telling people that the creepy you is going around trying to hook up men? Of course you won't care, would you? This is not your country, and at worse you pack your bags and go home while the locals clear up your SHIT. Shy or not, if no one makes the first move, nothing happens, and you just end up in this self-inflicted emotional drama. If you are interested in getting to know a guy better, establish that he is gay first, or you are simply wasting your time barking up the wrong tree. Once his sexual orientation is confirmed, get his number, go on a date, figure out if you are compatible, and want to know him more. If not, move on. If you do nothing, you spend the rest of your days (depending on how long the infatuation lasts), pining away on a fantasy, daydreaming all sorts of wonderful scenarios as a couple, that will never happen because you decided to do nothing. The worst-case scenario you get is a "no, I am not gay" or "no, I am already seeing someone." At least with that, you have closure, unless you much prefer to pine away like some romance novel. I understand that for some guys, pining away is a much-preferred option, as it protects them from hurt and rejection. However, hurt and rejection is part of the process of finding/meeting the guy you want to be with. So go out and join some gay activity group, there are several out there. You never know your new boyfriend is there. Edited February 18, 2024 by doncoin dazza1201 and mate69 2 Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 35 minutes ago, doncoin said: Shy or not, if no one makes the first move, nothing happens, and you just end up in this self-inflicted emotional drama. If you are interested in getting to know a guy better, establish that he is gay first, or you are simply wasting your time barking up the wrong tree. Once his sexual orientation is confirmed, get his number, go on a date, figure out if you are compatible, and want to know him more. If not, move on. If you do nothing, you spend the rest of your days (depending on how long the infatuation lasts), pining away on a fantasy, daydreaming all sorts of wonderful scenarios as a couple, that will never happen because you decided to do nothing. The worst-case scenario you get is a "no, I am not gay" or "no, I am already seeing someone." At least with that, you have closure, unless you much prefer to pine away like some romance novel. I understand that for some guys, pining away is a much-preferred option, as it protects them from hurt and rejection. However, hurt and rejection is part of the process of finding/meeting the guy you want to be with. So go out and join some gay activity group, there are several out there. You never know your new boyfriend is there. You missed the point completely. Someone here was talking about " In public transport settings you won't always have time. The other might rush to work or to an event etc. exchanging numbers is the best way to get to know the other." So what "establish that he is gay first" are you even talking about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted February 18, 2024 Report Share Posted February 18, 2024 (edited) 3 hours ago, Guest Guest said: You missed the point completely. Someone here was talking about " In public transport settings you won't always have time. The other might rush to work or to an event etc. exchanging numbers is the best way to get to know the other." So what "establish that he is gay first" are you even talking about? I see, for what it is worth, I did once get the number of a guy on public transport. We were both on a flight. Our eyes met in the boarding area, and throughout the flight, we made eye contact a few times as he was seated on the other side of the plane one row in front of me by the aisle. After disembarkation, he waited for me gave me his business card, and rushed off to his connecting flight. I suppose for public transport it does depend on the length of the journey, and yes, I do think it is more challenging in Singapore as people are more discreet, and flirting openly is frowned upon. We did go on a date weeks later after spending some time texting and talking on the phone. Unfortunately, no chemistry. Edited February 18, 2024 by doncoin Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post fitcubsg Posted February 19, 2024 Popular Post Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 Apps dont work at all, organic meeing is the best. Guess i met all my exes in social settings, a bar, a sauna, a cruising spot, gym. I also am born with a resting bitch face that gets worse when i am lifting weights. Also am a capricorn and by nature very standoffish in any social setting. So yup, there are ways to meet someone outside the app world, people fake their ages, pics with filters, pics that are 20 years old etc. I am of the notion, what you see, is what you get. With exception of this blog, my face is not hidden in any of the apps. But in Singapore, everyone is either in the closet or has something to hide. Asians are not shy, I am not. Haha. funky beaver, calvt, Hulkhunk and 2 others 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Balestier Posted February 19, 2024 Popular Post Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 34 minutes ago, fitcubsg said: Apps dont work at all, organic meeing is the best. Guess i met all my exes in social settings, a bar, a sauna, a cruising spot, gym. I also am born with a resting bitch face that gets worse when i am lifting weights. Also am a capricorn and by nature very standoffish in any social setting. So yup, there are ways to meet someone outside the app world, people fake their ages, pics with filters, pics that are 20 years old etc. I am of the notion, what you see, is what you get. With exception of this blog, my face is not hidden in any of the apps. But in Singapore, everyone is either in the closet or has something to hide. Asians are not shy, I am not. Haha. Meeting face to face is a good start. No expectations. And WYSIWYG. A friendship without sex can last longer. calvt, Cydon, feilyxnixx and 2 others 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 I don't see any issue in approaching someone who is interested into you and step to the MRT platform and exchange telephone numbers. What is the danger? Nobody knows why and for what reason. You could be old school friends who lost touch and meet again. Surely, anyone inside the public transport would have caused some interest in the other. I never propagated to talk to any stranger who doesn't hint to you that he's into guys. And you can always start on neutral grounds. Obviously, there must be some signs that the other is into guys and into you. I find it hilarious that one certain bitter Guest troll has to come up with his hilariously silly posts and doesn't recognise how he just embarrasses himself here at every corner. It is obvious that nobody intends to stick around with any such bitter person. I feel pity for him that he is so lonely and can only resort to such stuff. I never recommended to contact anyone out of the blue you are attracted to in the public transport. But open your eyes, someone might be hinting to you... Balestier 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 10 hours ago, doncoin said: Shy or not, if no one makes the first move, nothing happens, and you just end up in this self-inflicted emotional drama. If you are interested in getting to know a guy better, establish that he is gay first, or you are simply wasting your time barking up the wrong tree. Once his sexual orientation is confirmed, get his number, go on a date, figure out if you are compatible, and want to know him more. If not, move on. If you do nothing, you spend the rest of your days (depending on how long the infatuation lasts), pining away on a fantasy, daydreaming all sorts of wonderful scenarios as a couple, that will never happen because you decided to do nothing. The worst-case scenario you get is a "no, I am not gay" or "no, I am already seeing someone." At least with that, you have closure, unless you much prefer to pine away like some romance novel. I understand that for some guys, pining away is a much-preferred option, as it protects them from hurt and rejection. However, hurt and rejection is part of the process of finding/meeting the guy you want to be with. So go out and join some gay activity group, there are several out there. You never know your new boyfriend is there. Exactly, you hit the point. Surely, you must have some reason to assume that the other guy (in public situations/ public transport) is into guys. What I meant is with not having time, was time to go to a coffee shop or somewhere to talk to the other. Maybe you're in the public transport rushing to a meeting or having some private things to settle otherwise. Not everyone has the luxury during office hours to spend time in coffee shops talking to a potential date... In such cases, when you're in a rush or don't have much time, you can just first exchange the telephone numbers. But surely prior to that you must be certain the guy is gay. I m not sure why Guests can make the issue more complicated than it is in nature. (But actually I know why that Guest does that...🤡) doncoin and Balestier 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balestier Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 (edited) 17 minutes ago, singalion said: Exactly, you hit the point. Surely, you must have some reason to assume that the other guy (in public situations/ public transport) is into guys. What I meant is with not having time, was time to go to a coffee shop or somewhere to talk to the other. Maybe you're in the public transport rushing to a meeting or having some private things to settle otherwise. Not everyone has the luxury during office hours to spend time in coffee shops talking to a potential date... In such cases, when you're in a rush or don't have much time, you can just first exchange the telephone numbers. But surely prior to that you must be certain the guy is gay. I m not sure why Guests can make the issue more complicated than it is in nature. (But actually I know why that Guest does that...🤡) If a guy took the first step, be gracious and acknowledge. Can always exchange numbers and be friends. Not everyone wants to put his hands in yr underwear. Edited February 19, 2024 by Balestier Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 (edited) 18 minutes ago, Balestier said: If a guy took the first step, be gracious and acknowledge. Can always exchange numbers and be friends. Not everyone wants to put his hands in yr underwear. Everyone should be happy, as it is a sign that he is still attractive to others! Better than not being noticed by anyone. Unless it is inconvenient, colleagues around you etc, I would always talk to someone who shows interest, even if I know he is not really my type. At least I made a happy day for someone else. And you should respond to his courage "to come out" to someone. Edited February 19, 2024 by singalion Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 2 hours ago, singalion said: Everyone should be happy, as it is a sign that he is still attractive to others! Better than not being noticed by anyone. Unless it is inconvenient, colleagues around you etc, I would always talk to someone who shows interest, even if I know he is not really my type. At least I made a happy day for someone else. And you should respond to his courage "to come out" to someone. Creepo like you populate this forum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky beaver Posted February 19, 2024 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 3 hours ago, singalion said: Everyone should be happy, as it is a sign that he is still attractive to others! Better than not being noticed by anyone. Unless it is inconvenient, colleagues around you etc, I would always talk to someone who shows interest, even if I know he is not really my type. At least I made a happy day for someone else. And you should respond to his courage "to come out" to someone. I definitely will be happy if someone approached me in real life. Also, I don't find it weird if a straight person would do that. Some of more extreme extroverted person would approach anyone to talk to. Some of my friends are like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balestier Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 1 hour ago, funky beaver said: I definitely will be happy if someone approached me in real life. Also, I don't find it weird if a straight person would do that. Some of more extreme extroverted person would approach anyone to talk to. Some of my friends are like that. Esp insurance and housing agents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funky beaver Posted February 19, 2024 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 7 minutes ago, Balestier said: Esp insurance and housing agents. I am honestly not so happy if insurance or housing agents or direct seller approached me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
singalion Posted February 19, 2024 Report Share Posted February 19, 2024 (edited) 3 minutes ago, funky beaver said: I am honestly not so happy if insurance or housing agents or direct seller approached me. But if they are good looking, big nice tool and gay? 😂 I guess it violates the rules to market on the public transport also on bus interchanges and MRT stations. In other settings, these not the only annoying ones: movers, tuition ... I once thought of making a second name card for social or business events and hand a fake one with fake details to these people pestering you. 😆 Edited February 19, 2024 by singalion Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Test him Posted July 22, 2024 Report Share Posted July 22, 2024 On 2/18/2024 at 4:36 PM, Tate said: How do u know he is str8 or gay? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted July 22, 2024 Report Share Posted July 22, 2024 So recently I met this guy at the Apple store. Here's what happened. It was freaking hot on a weekend around 5ish, and I was out walking my dog in the neighbourhood. Given the heat, every time we walked by a store, and the doors opened, my dog wanted to go in to cool off. So finally, we arrived at the Apple store who had their a/c blasting, and given the concrete floor which was cool, my dog promptly lied down and refused to move. I finally carried him to one of the side areas so that he is out of the way, and just let him be. As I sat next to him by the window seat, he started attracting attention from the staff and customers. He is very cute and friendly. Several people stopped by to pet him etc. and my dog was enjoying every bit of attention. At some point. a guy sat next to me, he was waiting for one of the tech people to come down to help him. We started chatting, and I supposed my dog is a great wingman. The guy and I flirted a little, and we exchanged numbers using this new iPhone to iPhone bumped feature that one of the staff showed us. Later that evening, he texted me, and we met for a drink. It was ok. He was nice and everything, but not a match. cycle25 and mate69 2 Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egal Posted August 26, 2024 Report Share Posted August 26, 2024 so sweet. what a nice wingdog, lol doncoin 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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