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I was called a scammer for rejected one of the BW members


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Not sure if it's against to rule to put profile here, but AI_only messaged me on BW and ask to chat on TG and so I did. Asked me a number of things and finally, if I am interested to meet. I said that I can only decide after seeing a face photo. So he sent an expiring photo (I don't mind that, I understand privacy) of one taken from the bottom of his face, i.e. showing his chin mostly! Anyway, I reiterated that it should be a face photo and so he finally sent me one. After I saw it and said "sorry not suitable" and was called a scammer. lolz 

 

There seems to be a number of immature folks here from my own personal interactions, perhaps due to their closetness, emotional maturity seems to be shunted as well. Of course, this is not true for everyone and if you don't identify yourself as emotionally shunted and/or immature even though you are still in a closet, then I am not talking about you. If it touched a raw nerve, perhaps nobody really told you about this fact and it's definitely good to improve that lack of emotional maturity.

 

Anyway, not looking for additional comments or reasoning, but if you like to add to the conversation, please do. 

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Wah, you a scammer?

What did you scam him on? His photo?

Hahaha.

Some people are so deep in the closet that they are worried that their "pretty face" might be uploaded to some gay site and they get outed. 

It is such fears that makes them very anal and weird. 

They will turn hostile when they are being rejected because their ego is bruised

Their internal OS will think; "why would you reject a nice specimen like me".

 

So relax and moved on.

Such people are not worth your time.

Let them rot in their closet and die an anal virgin.

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Exactly as if a gay has an obligation to meet anyone for fun. 

Strangely, this mostly happens in Singapore. 

In other regions, even neighbouring countries guys are cool and even thank for your rejecting response. In Singapore you reject to meet in nicely terms but guys here go on and insult you or block you. How immature and childish. 

 

 

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On 5/21/2024 at 2:54 AM, kwongheng said:

Not sure if it's against to rule to put profile here, but AI_only messaged me on BW and ask to chat on TG and so I did. Asked me a number of things and finally, if I am interested to meet. I said that I can only decide after seeing a face photo. So he sent an expiring photo (I don't mind that, I understand privacy) of one taken from the bottom of his face, i.e. showing his chin mostly! Anyway, I reiterated that it should be a face photo and so he finally sent me one. After I saw it and said "sorry not suitable" and was called a scammer. lolz 

 

There seems to be a number of immature folks here from my own personal interactions, perhaps due to their closetness, emotional maturity seems to be shunted as well. Of course, this is not true for everyone and if you don't identify yourself as emotionally shunted and/or immature even though you are still in a closet, then I am not talking about you. If it touched a raw nerve, perhaps nobody really told you about this fact and it's definitely good to improve that lack of emotional maturity.

 

Anyway, not looking for additional comments or reasoning, but if you like to add to the conversation, please do. 

 

I... I don't feel tooo much empathy for your claim, and I think that this thread is unnecessary.

 

A BW member wanted to chat with you.  We BW members are not some homeless bumps from the street, the level of education here is good, everyone can at least understand some English.   The chat must have gone quite well, since he wanted to meet with you.   There was sex in mind?, so you wanted a face picture.  First mistake.  Why the face?  To check his ethnicity??  He sent you one, which you judged "expiry".  How did you find it "expiry"?  Was it all yellowish?   You could have asked for a full body photo, which would have given you a way-out excuse that was not insulting.

 

Your response "sorry not suitable"  WAS insulting.  We already have to obey an 11th Commandment to NEVER tell a woman that she is ugly or unattractive.  And we gays also have feelings.  There was no explanation of the "unsuitable", and he surely must have thought that you found him ugly. You could have made up a much better excuse, like:  " you are too young for me, I like older men, uncles and grandpas over 50. Yet if you want to meet to chat, this is fine with me ".  Or " you are in good shape, but I am turned on by bears ".  

 

Then, in response to your insult,  he made another one.  BIG DEAL...  You should have accepted the situation and not made a complaint here,  and especially,  not naming the person!

.

Edited by Steve5380
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On 5/21/2024 at 3:54 PM, kwongheng said:

After I saw it and said "sorry not suitable" and was called a scammer. lolz

 

You should have added something like "But you'll remain on my list for suitable future considerations. in the meantime I wished you a prosperous future endeavour.",  to make it sound more polite.

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On 5/21/2024 at 3:54 PM, kwongheng said:

After I saw it and said "sorry not suitable" and was called a scammer

 

The scam was that you wrote "not suitable", which is untrue, as you and him where a man and your or his tool fitted into it where it was intended for eventually... 

 

In that sense you scammed him!

 

Leaving the comical side I advise to never write something too personal and would never use words like "suitable". 

 

Either write something neutral like, "sorry my mother is calling and get back to you" (but you won't) or "I need to rush to..." . The phrase I also use is: "I m not sure it will work out" which places the blame on yourself as nobody wants to meet with a guy who's dick never gets hard...

 

"Suitable" has this notion of you're below my standards or you're not worth in it. 

 

The way how you phrase a rejection is important. 

 

 

 

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Guest Wrong choice of word
On 5/21/2024 at 3:54 PM, kwongheng said:

Not sure if it's against to rule to put profile here,

 

Anyway, not looking for additional comments or reasoning, but if you like to add to the conversation, please do. 

I believed "scammer" is the word you chose for the title.  He probably said you played him out after looking at his photo. 

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20 minutes ago, radiusulnar said:

perhaps mismatched expectations

 

To be honest, what is the hype of being rejected after photo exchange.

Some guys are well aware that their looks are not cute and twist and turn to send a picture.

 

For many people face is just important for a match, so don't make much problem about sending a face picture.

 

Further, if you are self aware that your looks are normal to not cute, then be prepared for rejections.

 

It already starts with the issue for not providing any profile picture at all.

In my experience it in most cases doesn't boil down to being discreet but awareness by the guys who don't put up a picture in their profile that their looks are just in the less cute category.

It is the same with mentioning the age.

there are many guys even just 31y and still making such a fuss on mentioning their age.

 

 

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