being yelled at or yelling at work

[egal]

like really shouting / yelling in loud voice.  not a stern tone, but really shouting at the top of your voice?

 

do you experience it daily or even do so yourself?

 

not you necessarily being yelled at, but your colleagues etc?

 

a senior staff said it is necessary when dealing with production staff etc

[Kimochi]

Utilizing the fear tactic. Bad for everyone's health. Not only to the one he / she shouted at,  but also those who hear it. Negative energy generated and it's bad both Physically and mentally, as well as for the whole company. It's like giving approval for the superior to behave this manner. Very disrespectful manner. Productivity will go even lower because some will lose the drive to work. Many production workers probably just want to get by the day with enough meals for food and rent.  Who is born to get yelled at? 

 

OTOH, are the workers super fucked up / typical gen z who think they conquer the whole universe type?

 

 

 

[egal]

i think because the productions workers are mostly work permit holders, they have to put up with it; if not they would be sent home

 

 

on the flip side, i think maybe, if this yelling staff / head is too nice, work would not get done

[Kimochi]

31 minutes ago, egal said:

i think because the productions workers are mostly work permit holders, they have to put up with it; if not they would be sent home

 

 

on the flip side, i think maybe, if this yelling staff / head is too nice, work would not get done

If permit work holders have to put up with it, meaning he abusing powers already. (Not the first i've experienced though) Some just like to thrash them thinking they are higher class than them. 

Some probably at home want but their wife dunwan. Have to release his pent up anger at them... ??

 

[egal]

it is a she

[Kimochi]

3 minutes ago, egal said:

it is a she

Likely abuse authority / she want but husband dunwan loh ~

 

Or is she butch? Different matter liao.

Edited August 29 by Kimochi

[egal]

no, i heard in front of her husband she was all demure and sweet

[Kimochi]

3 hours ago, egal said:

no, i heard in front of her husband she was all demure and sweet

Then you ask her why the double standard loh 😂

[doncoin]

I think yelling or being verbally loud have their moments. Personally I dislike it as I do not see how raising the volume of one's voice is going to improve the communication unless the person they are communicating with is hard of hearing. However, more importantly is the tone of the voice. I worked in a very high-octane industry for years where, unfortunately, yelling is quite common, especially amongst the senior people. I have been yelled at more than I can count in my early days, and it was tough, and it can break you down. You get publicly castigated, and shamed in front of your co-workers. However, at the same time, I also learned that it is how many people learn their lessons. i am sure there are better ways around it, but the public yelling and shaming did have the intended effect of making me better at my job however unhealthy mentally it is. 

 

One thing I have learned is that it is ok to feel embarrassed during those moments of public humiliation. It is ok to feel like crying, and it is ok to go cry. The thing is do you let that moment dictate the rest of your life, or you use it as a lesson not to screw up again at work? As my mentor said to me once after I was so publicly humiliated, "go have a good cry, or do what you need to do to process your emotions. Once you have let it go, come back to your desk, and have a good talk with your boss on what went wrong, and how you can do better." 

 

My personal observation is people who raise their voices aggressively at work typically are frustrated, and lost their capacity to express their frustration in a calm and professional manner. It also boils down to personality and how you handle frustrations. It is also important to recognize that when you are being yelled at, is the person yelling targeting you personally, or just you happened to be in front of the firing squad? It is important to recognize that even when you are being yelled at, sometimes it is not about you. You just happened to be on the receiving end, and learn not to take it personally. 

[egal]

7 hours ago, Kimochi said:

Then you ask her why the double standard loh 😂

do i care, lol

[egal]

43 minutes ago, doncoin said:

I think yelling or being verbally loud have their moments. Personally I dislike it as I do not see how raising the volume of one's voice is going to improve the communication unless the person they are communicating with is hard of hearing. However, more importantly is the tone of the voice. I worked in a very high-octane industry for years where, unfortunately, yelling is quite common, especially amongst the senior people. I have been yelled at more than I can count in my early days, and it was tough, and it can break you down. You get publicly castigated, and shamed in front of your co-workers. However, at the same time, I also learned that it is how many people learn their lessons. i am sure there are better ways around it, but the public yelling and shaming did have the intended effect of making me better at my job however unhealthy mentally it is. 

 

One thing I have learned is that it is ok to feel embarrassed during those moments of public humiliation. It is ok to feel like crying, and it is ok to go cry. The thing is do you let that moment dictate the rest of your life, or you use it as a lesson not to screw up again at work? As my mentor said to me once after I was so publicly humiliated, "go have a good cry, or do what you need to do to process your emotions. Once you have let it go, come back to your desk, and have a good talk with your boss on what went wrong, and how you can do better." 

 

My personal observation is people who raise their voices aggressively at work typically are frustrated, and lost their capacity to express their frustration in a calm and professional manner. It also boils down to personality and how you handle frustrations. It is also important to recognize that when you are being yelled at, is the person yelling targeting you personally, or just you happened to be in front of the firing squad? It is important to recognize that even when you are being yelled at, sometimes it is not about you. You just happened to be on the receiving end, and learn not to take it personally. 

woww, tht takes a lot of maturity

[doncoin]

29 minutes ago, egal said:

woww, tht takes a lot of maturity

 

Just comes from years of dealing with people who are like that, and after a while, you start recognizing the patterns, and come to the conclusion that it is not about you. 

[egal]

the one that i encountered yells at everyone daily, albeit different people for different issues.

[TigerYam]

So far only the fkg Singapore local bosses and top senior yelled at me. Really CCB. Never find out black and white, just yelled like a dog.

 

Prefer angmoh and Japanese bosses, at least not like a mad local dogs.

[egal]

those sad people who only feel powerful when shouting at others

[cutejack]

13 hours ago, egal said:

do i care, lol

U start the topic n now u r asking this question? U OK anot?

[cutejack]

Aiyah, normal la..that's how a bitch works.

On 8/29/2024 at 2:17 PM, egal said:

it is a she

 

[egal]

tht is quite sexist

[auscent]

It is ok to express emotions, but in a measured way. The short term joy cannot win over long term regret.

[egal]

mayb not getting enough or any at home

[gtlife64]

11 hours ago, auscent said:

It is ok to express emotions, but in a measured way. The short term joy cannot win over long term regret.

 

Agree. Most times, bad bosses only know how to let go their negative emotions. They don't know the employee's hardship or problems, and only regretted when their most trusted and loyal workers leave the company. 

[auscent]

2 hours ago, gtlife64 said:

 

Agree. Most times, bad bosses only know how to let go their negative emotions. They don't know the employee's hardship or problems, and only regretted when their most trusted and loyal workers leave the company. 

Likewise for employees

[bluerunner]

On 10/19/2024 at 10:01 AM, gtlife64 said:

 

Agree. Most times, bad bosses only know how to let go their negative emotions. They don't know the employee's hardship or problems, and only regretted when their most trusted and loyal workers leave the company. 

I don’t think it’s not that they ‘don’t know the employees’ hardship or problems’. It’s more like they do not have the skill/knowledge to handle it. There are managers who are out into the seat for whatever (wrong) reasons. 
Worse, these managers refuse to knowledge their incompetency. 
Company culture also plays an important part. 
Some employees complained about their boss when they were junior employees. When they reach management level, you see them behaving exactly what they once complained about. Why so? 
 

Edited October 31 by bluerunner
Added info

[Steve5380]

To be yelled at, to be humiliated, put down, is a hardship we all have experienced.  It is the hardest when it is justified.  So, what to make out of it?

 

It is convenient to be able to be yelled at, humiliated, without breaking down and escalating the situation. Silence is golden.  A good way to handle it is to find it to be a means to evolve and grow.  Instead of being destroyed by it, we should receive it as a learning experience.  Once we are evolved and experienced, we should have the freedom to accept it or reject it.