Picky food partner

[FattChoy]

I find it exhausting being with a partner who tells me he doesn't eat, beef or lamb. Or he finds duck meat smelly.  Or he's a straight out vegetarian.  Of that he doesn't like Western food.  Arrgh...

 

My partner once stated he doesn't like buffets, cos they come across as cheap food.  So many boundaries ya.

Edited October 14 by FattChoy

[feilyxnixx]

my ex-bf was a vegetarian , and i was very willing to eat together with him vegetarian food.

 

we broke up because he doesnt know how to take initiative to find where to eat. lame reason i know , but its very taxing on my mind...>_>

[Sweetie Pie]

1 hour ago, FattChoy said:

I find it exhausting being with a partner who tells me he doesn't eat, beef or lamb. Or he finds duck meat smelly.  Or he's a straight out vegetarian.  Of that he doesn't like Western food.  Arrgh...

 

My partner once stated he doesn't like buffets, cos they come across as cheap food.  So many boundaries ya.

May be what you said previously is true.

 

On 10/12/2024 at 8:42 PM, FattChoy said:

 

If you can't see his point, then you've wasted decades living as a human.  Next time just tell him you're too shallow to empathize.

[radiusulnar]

2 hours ago, feilyxnixx said:

he doesnt know how to take initiative to find where to eat.

This is quite funny. I thought vegetarians or anyone with dietary restrictions will definitely know where to go to eat.

[feilyxnixx]

1 hour ago, radiusulnar said:

This is quite funny. I thought vegetarians or anyone with dietary restrictions will definitely know where to go to eat.

 

me too! i thot they will have ownself google which places to eat if we'r going out ot play PoGo. end up....bleh >_>

[ToughGuy]

6 hours ago, FattChoy said:

I find it exhausting being with a partner who tells me he doesn't eat, beef or lamb. Or he finds duck meat smelly.  Or he's a straight out vegetarian.  Of that he doesn't like Western food.  Arrgh...

 

My partner once stated he doesn't like buffets, cos they come across as cheap food.  So many boundaries ya.

Find another person to be your partner.

 

If the basics do not sync, it's just going to be hell 

 

I dun like cold and dry environment..this is prerequisite ...so if can't accept this, no need to chat further 

[ToughGuy]

6 hours ago, feilyxnixx said:

my ex-bf was a vegetarian , and i was very willing to eat together with him vegetarian food.

 

we broke up because he doesnt know how to take initiative to find where to eat. lame reason i know , but its very taxing on my mind...>_>

Seems that food can be cause of many breakup ... This is super new to me ..maybe younger gen hv lots to choose from ...my gen, got food, thanks God. ...eat and shut up 

[mate69]

Yes

[feilyxnixx]

4 hours ago, ToughGuy said:

Seems that food can be cause of many breakup ... This is super new to me ..maybe younger gen hv lots to choose from ...my gen, got food, thanks God. ...eat and shut up 

 

i broke up with him cause he 0 initiative when hes the one with restrictions...>_> i think im already very nice by being accomodating. 

i also not picky with food , just no spicy. got food can already , $4 cai png is the way to go! +_+

[egal]

now it is min 4,50

[egal]

plus gst hike next year

[ToughGuy]

6 hours ago, feilyxnixx said:

 

i broke up with him cause he 0 initiative when hes the one with restrictions...>_> i think im already very nice by being accomodating. 

i also not picky with food , just no spicy. got food can already , $4 cai png is the way to go! +_+

If you are in Msia, msg me...I bring you to makan2... Maybe we can be partners😂😂😂

[iKneadyou]

Woa .. I am willing to accommodate if my partner is vegetarian. Both has to plan where to eat. Maybe take turns?

 

but! If he’s vegan, I think I’ll pass

[Relationship]

Sometime is better to pass that person if this arise. Unless there is a win win situation 

[Sweetie Pie]

Wait till you meet someone who prefers a diet lower in carbs, sugar, salt, and oil if you think vegetarians are too difficult to handle.  Don't you want a companion who is health conscious? The latter trend is very popular these days.   

[doncoin]

On 10/14/2024 at 2:28 AM, FattChoy said:

I find it exhausting being with a partner who tells me he doesn't eat, beef or lamb. Or he finds duck meat smelly.  Or he's a straight out vegetarian.  Of that he doesn't like Western food.  Arrgh...

 

My partner once stated he doesn't like buffets, cos they come across as cheap food.  So many boundaries ya.

 

In Singapore, you can find places that accommodate a wide variety of dietary restrictions. If you are dating someone who is very picky and difficult, make them come up with places to go and eat because you are the one accommodating him, not him accommodating you.  

 

Buffets are hit or miss and I can see where your partner is coming from. A buffet at Ritz Carlton is going to be at a higher standard than Vienna at Novena. Little things make the difference, like the hotels will probably have their own pastry chef in-house and so the cakes and breads are baked on premise, whereas a restaurant will typically outsource the pastries etc. You get what you pay for basically. 

 

[singalion]

On 10/14/2024 at 2:28 PM, FattChoy said:

I find it exhausting being with a partner who tells me he doesn't eat, beef or lamb. Or he finds duck meat smelly.  Or he's a straight out vegetarian.  Of that he doesn't like Western food.  Arrgh...

 

My partner once stated he doesn't like buffets, cos they come across as cheap food.  So many boundaries ya.

 

Thanks for sharing,, but what do you want us to do?

 

By the way Western food knows a lot of vegetarian salads or noodle dishes. It's just a google away.

 

What I would recommend in your situation: Cook at home!

 

But looking at it, it looks to me a bit the sort of your partner is having a general issue with you and just jumps onto the food thing because he doesn't directly want to talk to you what the issue is. Maybe he came across some "adultery" by you (can be just a suspicion) and voices his dissatisfaction by the food thing (just intending to annoy you).

 

Time to sit down and talk?

 

PS: Those 300 SGD buffets per pax at 5* hotels surely don't come as "cheap food", ha ha.

 

[FattChoy]

32 minutes ago, singalion said:

 

Thanks for sharing,, but what do you want us to do?

 

By the way Western food knows a lot of vegetarian salads or noodle dishes. It's just a google away.

 

What I would recommend in your situation: Cook at home!

 

But looking at it, it looks to me a bit the sort of your partner is having a general issue with you and just jumps onto the food thing because he doesn't directly want to talk to you what the issue is. Maybe he came across some "adultery" by you (can be just a suspicion) and voices his dissatisfaction by the food thing (just intending to annoy you).

 

Time to sit down and talk?

 

PS: Those 300 SGD buffets per pax at 5* hotels surely don't come as "cheap food", ha ha.

 

I've already clearly stated your views are not welcome on my threads.  So kindly practice a little self control.  Tq

[singalion]

5 minutes ago, FattChoy said:

I've already clearly stated your views are not welcome on my threads.  So kindly practice a little self control.  Tq

 

But it is not at your personal choice who responds to threads at BW!

BW is not your personal blog!

 

BW is an open and inclusive forum for everyone and not your personal platform. At your age you should be sufficiently grown up to be aware about this.

 

If you enter a topic at BW, be prepared that all kind of Members with various backgrounds reply to the topic!

 

 

Edited October 16 by singalion

[FattChoy]

16 hours ago, doncoin said:

 

In Singapore, you can find places that accommodate a wide variety of dietary restrictions. If you are dating someone who is very picky and difficult, make them come up with places to go and eat because you are the one accommodating him, not him accommodating you.  

 

Buffets are hit or miss and I can see where your partner is coming from. A buffet at Ritz Carlton is going to be at a higher standard than Vienna at Novena. Little things make the difference, like the hotels will probably have their own pastry chef in-house and so the cakes and breads are baked on premise, whereas a restaurant will typically outsource the pastries etc. You get what you pay for basically. 

 

Yes of course.  I agree all your points.  We're not joined at the hip, so dining at different places is not out of consideration.  I just wish people aren't so picky.  

 

As for vegetarian, I feel like sometimes I'm more worried than the vegetarian partner.  While we're traveling and having a good time trying out all the local cuisines, it can be a killjoy if the person says, "Don't worry about me, I've dabao-ed some sliced bread for lunch".  Then indirectly I would be feel guilty or worried or some negative feelings creep over to taint the joy of travel.

 

The joy meter would definitely go down a few notches.  

 

Edited October 16 by FattChoy

[FattChoy]

9 minutes ago, FattChoy said:

Yes of course.  I agree all your points.  We're not joined at the hip, so dining at different places is not out of consideration.  I just wish people aren't so picky.  

 

As for vegetarian, I feel like sometimes I'm more worried than the vegetarian partner.  While we're traveling and having a good time trying out all the local cuisines, it can be a killjoy if the person says, "Don't worry about me, I've dabao-ed some sliced bread for lunch".  Then indirectly I would be feel guilty or worried or some negative feelings creep over to taint the joy of travel.

 

The joy meter would definitely go down a few notches.  

 

 

 

Even family members can be picky.

I have two who tells me they no longer eat rice, or noodles cos or they would practically suffer the next 48 hours from acid reflux if they do.   Proceeds to tell me she haven't eaten rice/noodles in years to avoid that.  And God forbid she takes MSG.  Then her thyroid should swell from hormone disrupters.  

 

Once I took my brother to a Xinjiang restaurant in China and sorryla, 羊肉串 as well as any beef is out cos he prays to Guan Yin.  Also can't stomach duck in 北京烤鸭 because he doesn't like the smell of ducks back home.  (As if the ducks smell as bad in China as it does to him at home).

 

Then my partner says any Chinese food which uses mala peppers is out cos it kills his taste cells in his tongue.  The list goes on.  

Edited October 16 by FattChoy

[FattChoy]

On 10/15/2024 at 11:16 AM, Relationship said:

Sometime is better to pass that person if this arise. Unless there is a win win situation 

 

That's not a deal breaker.  Like I said, can just eat apart.  It's the only sane solution.  But it is a point of annoyance.  

[FattChoy]

On 10/15/2024 at 10:33 AM, iKneadyou said:

Woa .. I am willing to accommodate if my partner is vegetarian. Both has to plan where to eat. Maybe take turns?

 

but! If he’s vegan, I think I’ll pass

I've done that in the past, and it's like "if it makes him happy, then I'm happy too".  But accompanying him to eat vegetarian came with an opportunity cost, esp when we're traveling and want to try out viral foods like seafood or grassland dishes which are meat based.  Basically after decades of 妥协, I lose more and more of myself.  

 

Sam Smith's song, Midnight Train, captured it so well:

"But I give another piece of me away.  Every single day".

 

[doncoin]

12 hours ago, FattChoy said:

 

 

Even family members can be picky.

I have two who tells me they no longer eat rice, or noodles cos or they would practically suffer the next 48 hours from acid reflux if they do.   Proceeds to tell me she haven't eaten rice/noodles in years to avoid that.  And God forbid she takes MSG.  Then her thyroid should swell from hormone disrupters.  

 

Once I took my brother to a Xinjiang restaurant in China and sorryla, 羊肉串 as well as any beef is out cos he prays to Guan Yin.  Also can't stomach duck in 北京烤鸭 because he doesn't like the smell of ducks back home.  (As if the ducks smell as bad in China as it does to him at home).

 

Then my partner says any Chinese food which uses mala peppers is out cos it kills his taste cells in his tongue.  The list goes on.  

 

 

So in the spirit of sharing, I am usually the picky one when it comes to food. I do intermittent fasting, so no breakfast meetings typically and no dinner plans after 7pm unless it is a weekend or I have enough time to adjust my fasting hours. Like two of your family members, I am on a very low carb diet, so no rice/ noodles etc. To add to the challenges, I am also pescatarian. However, I can usually work around a menu at a restaurant or dining establishment. If the items comes with rice or noodles, I just don't eat them, and just eat the rest of the bowl/plate. I simply do not see the reason of needing everyone around me to accommodate my needs. 

 

For me, having a meal together is not so much about the food, sure it adds to the experience, but more about the company, and building the relationship. 

 

 

[singalion]

12 hours ago, doncoin said:

 

 

So in the spirit of sharing, I am usually the picky one when it comes to food. I do intermittent fasting, so no breakfast meetings typically and no dinner plans after 7pm unless it is a weekend or I have enough time to adjust my fasting hours. Like two of your family members, I am on a very low carb diet, so no rice/ noodles etc. To add to the challenges, I am also pescatarian. However, I can usually work around a menu at a restaurant or dining establishment. If the items comes with rice or noodles, I just don't eat them, and just eat the rest of the bowl/plate. I simply do not see the reason of needing everyone around me to accommodate my needs. 

 

For me, having a meal together is not so much about the food, sure it adds to the experience, but more about the company, and building the relationship. 

 

 

 

Better tell the food establishment from the start that you don't want any condiments (rice, noodle, potato) then you can also reduce any food waste.

 

You are very right to point to the fact that being together with another person for dinner/lunch etc is more important than the food.

 

You can join breakfast meetings (just don't eat anything and only drink water etc) . In our company if you deny breakfast meetings, then probably would get negative points. Just play the game but don't eat the food... Better for your employment relationship.

If it's an important deal maker meeting, might look also weird to the invited customer, e.g. if you had done all the talks before any meet up and then you're not around.

 

 

 

 

Edited October 17 by singalion

[mate69]

Things get complicated if the other half also doesn't like to waste food