Cheating Boyfriend / Lover + Why Cheat when In a Relationship? (Compiled)

[Guest -snowball-]

-jensen- , i hope you have a happy returns & ending when you old, someone who are as mono as you, pure & holy like your character, the way you express with your words, God bless you :whistle:

[Guest -raymond-]

I have done some charity work at an old folks home in Serangoon Garden before and yes most of the old folks there do have children and grandchildren. According to them, either their children are working adults and have not time to take care of them or don't want them at all. Quite sad but I guessed I was hearing their side of the story so may not be 100% true. Sorry just side track a bit. Let's get back to the main topic

[Guest Guesto]

... between Justin and Brian... as a 'bf' relationship - have an agreement... everyone else you fuxk, it will only be ONCE. never again. and 100% use of the condom. the only 'regular' is each other... and it worked out quite well too... even in real life here...

and they dun kiss their flings on the mouth too...

why get so emotional? Simply just sit down with him and talk abt it. Reach a mutual agreement and then move on. If not happy about it, then call it quits loh.

instead of sitting there and whining like a cry-baby, why not get into action and get some things done?

[UFO]

Guest, unless you have a normal family, get married & have kid to bother u whole day till you tire till you don't feel like doing anything, watch them grow up, when they call you dad etc, that type of feeling is awesome, your life will never be complete no matter what excusse you give, still there are alot str or bi married guys that flirt around, unless you are childish & refuse to grow up & don't know what's outside world. sure there is some that are totally mono, but is it both party are & how long they attach or maybe they totally not sex drive at all? 5 years not consider long so mono still too early to say they can last " forever ", mind Guest, you attach? never say never, you don't even know next moment will you get angry or your what your mood like, pls be mature don't anyhow use " your parents " this type of words, cos it will reflect your character that don't earn any respect at all, this is a forum to share own view, else don't read.

Normal??? Are we gay abnormal??? IS all depends on your mindset....

[UFO]

WHAT A F. UP WORLD U GUYS LIVE IN.

wait till u are old and crippled with disease... who would take care of u.

ur loving gay partner?

Please go and have a normal family life.

Please laa.... Old, crippled...??? Everyone will be oneday.. Disease???? Unless people like u who Fxxk Ard should worry abit it. Please... Life is not only bf/partner bah.... We still have my family... Parents, sister, brother, nieces and nephews lah.. Of cos, we dun expect others to take care of us If we dun take care of oursleves well.. right?

As I had said in this forum before.... Who the Fxxk are you to tell what is normal? Who are you to judge? Your 'normal family' will never get old cripple and with disease... ??? Very Shallow... Open ur Fxxking eyes and see the world ard u... leave the country and see the othe side of the world!!!

People with normal family life... still fool ard ... and have 2 fmailies at a time... even cases that half brother and sister fall in love and have sex.. till they found out that they have the same father!!! (UK) Is that Normal????

Edited September 20, 2008 by Walfred

[Guest Realism]

I believe the most common and only logical excuse is "do what you want outside but don't get caught"! But, you must know also that your little secret will be out one day, simply b'cos the circle is just too small. So do what you want now but be prepared for the consequences, if you have not thought about them. Forget what others say about gay, sex, monogamy blah blah blah. Why not just tell yourself... Just go ahead, do it, if you can handle the consequences!

[abang]

Remember your boyfriend dont belongs to you, the more you try to restrain him, the higher the chance of infidelity...

So from my past experience (oops twenty odd years of it), let him do his things as long as at the end of the day, he comes back to you.

If you really cant accept it, I would advise this = Dont have a boyfriend!

OK I know this is harsh but the reality is that, gay sex is a non-binding union...

There is no pregancy to worry about...

So, let him do his things if you really love him...

[Guest -Abun-]

Remember your boyfriend dont belongs to you, the more you try to restrain him, the higher the chance of infidelity...

So from my past experience (oops twenty odd years of it), let him do his things as long as at the end of the day, he comes back to you.

If you really cant accept it, I would advise this = Dont have a boyfriend!

OK I know this is harsh but the reality is that, gay sex is a non-binding union...

There is no pregancy to worry about...

So, let him do his things if you really love him...

This sounds like a "let him do it, so that I can too" theory. If that's the case, it's pretty much an open relationship between 2. And a mutually agreed open relationship should be established if you really want things to work out.

[abang]

Aiyah. in this age and time, why should anyone believe in monogamy?

Just me.. dont attack me for being a flirt... (mental flirt that is!)

[olderchnchub]

Hmm...as for me....i totally believe in monogamy, open relationships or anything in between...if IT'S AGREEED BY BOTH PARTIES OR ALL PARTIES CONCERNED. "Cheating" is never a good thing...any way you slice it. I sincerely think most of us are missing the point in this discussion. I am in total agreement that the need for variety is a very human attribute...but on the other hand...i think deceit, dishonesty, lact of integrity and narcissism is very uncivilized. Cowardice also comes to mind. If you have gone into a relationship where monogamy was agreed upon...fullfill it. If you can't, after a period of time, let it be known to the other party. Giving the reason that variety is the spice of life or "hey, everyone does it, men will be men etc etc" is so passe and infantile. Let's not "downgrade deviant behavior". Bad and inappropriate behavior is universal...it applies to all cultures, genders and yes...sexual orientations. No exceptions. There is this thing called "evolution". Let me try to explain...in the simplest of terms. In the stone ages...whenever someone would want something from someone, all they would do is to club that someone over the head and seize pocession. I would like to think that we have gone past that...have evolved. Hey, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that men and women are all hardwired for multiple sex partners. But something happened along the way since the stone ages...it's called C I V I L I Z A T O N. A place where...integrity, credibility, honesty, kindness and care are valued as positive attributes. Cheating is...for lack of a better word...gross, in ANY kind of relationship, even in business. Think I can safely say that no one appreciates being cheated on. What makes you think that the person next to you would be any different or any less deserving of being treated in a dignified manner?

In a nutshell...lets be honest to one another. If it was agreed to be monogamous...stand by it. If it was agreed that it be open or something in between...stand by it. And if you should find that you can't keep your end of the bargain at a later stage, discuss it...be brave...not be cowards by sneaking around like roaches. I just don't buy into the argument that guys will be guys...variety is the spice of life...not in this context. It's uncivilized...even if you wear a rolex or carry a LV bag. A rat is still a rat.

In conclusion...i think many of us think that the state of being civilized and/or civilization comes in the form of tall buildings, condos, modern shopping malls, the latest mobile phones, large bank accounts, shiny things or perhaps branded clothes and underwear or even heavy makeup. That's being materialistic and superficial. Being refined and civilized is never limited to that..most of it, comes from within.

Edited September 23, 2008 by olderchnchub

[orochi98]

Well I have been cheated before but I also did the same by going to sauna. Anyway in the end the best way is for you to communicate with each other. Set out the ground rules and what you want for the relationship. If you want an open relationship, then tell your partner about it. Or if you want a monogamous relationship, you have to communicate with him and both be agreeable and committed to that. No point saying that you want a monogamous relationship when you yourself go around and flirt. Well I have learnt my lesson in having a relationship. If you really want a monogamous relationship, you have to be committed to each other and make sure you think that he's the one that you are going to live with all your life. Otherwise it would be difficult to be monogamous. And also you also need to make the relationship interesting and not do all the routine things like eat at the same place, have sex in same position/place, etc. Try to be a little more adventurous and change your routines so that your partner won't find it boring.

[Guest ExposeThem]

Read the post of Cheated behind my back and agree that if 2 persons in a relationship want to play outside they should be honest about it. Hate those who are in a "monogamous" relationship but actually cheat behind the partner and go on cheating on others outside, thinking that nobody will ever find out. So I like to start this thread for everyone of us to play a part in exposing all of these cheaters. Whenever anyone of us find out that someone is cheating on his partner outside, we can post his secret nickname that he uses to chat and meet other guys outside. Of course do not need to post any pics to protect privacy of the guys involved, but his secret nickname and maybe name will be enough to expose their indecent acts to those who know them and teach them a good lesson!

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

[reflection]

真是冤孽

[Guest -bear-]

Please lah! u think u own a person? if a person wants to cheat who are u to control?

let go and move on! thats the adult thing to do!

[Guest FattChoy88]

I think you need to get a life.

Read the post of Cheated behind my back and agree that if 2 persons in a relationship want to play outside they should be honest about it. Hate those who are in a "monogamous" relationship but actually cheat behind the partner and go on cheating on others outside, thinking that nobody will ever find out. So I like to start this thread for everyone of us to play a part in exposing all of these cheaters. Whenever anyone of us find out that someone is cheating on his partner outside, we can post his secret nickname that he uses to chat and meet other guys outside. Of course do not need to post any pics to protect privacy of the guys involved, but his secret nickname and maybe name will be enough to expose their indecent acts to those who know them and teach them a good lesson!

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

[Guest Guilty]

Please don't!! Currently I am in love with someone who is attached. I asked him whether he feel guilty to his partner but he told me that I am just his fxxk buddy, so should be ok. If you expose them, their relationship may sour because of here and not because of me.

[reflection]

Please don't!! Currently I am in love with someone who is attached. I asked him whether he feel guilty to his partner but he told me that I am just his fxxk buddy, so should be ok. If you expose them, their relationship may sour because of here and not because of me.

Self-consolation and Blaming others.....another classics

Edited September 29, 2008 by reflection

[Guest Guest]

Read the post of Cheated behind my back and agree that if 2 persons in a relationship want to play outside they should be honest about it. Hate those who are in a "monogamous" relationship but actually cheat behind the partner and go on cheating on others outside, thinking that nobody will ever find out. So I like to start this thread for everyone of us to play a part in exposing all of these cheaters. Whenever anyone of us find out that someone is cheating on his partner outside, we can post his secret nickname that he uses to chat and meet other guys outside. Of course do not need to post any pics to protect privacy of the guys involved, but his secret nickname and maybe name will be enough to expose their indecent acts to those who know them and teach them a good lesson!

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

i hope u dont cheat behind as long as u live...

[chubbylover]

Read the post of Cheated behind my back and agree that if 2 persons in a relationship want to play outside they should be honest about it. Hate those who are in a "monogamous" relationship but actually cheat behind the partner and go on cheating on others outside, thinking that nobody will ever find out. So I like to start this thread for everyone of us to play a part in exposing all of these cheaters. Whenever anyone of us find out that someone is cheating on his partner outside, we can post his secret nickname that he uses to chat and meet other guys outside. Of course do not need to post any pics to protect privacy of the guys involved, but his secret nickname and maybe name will be enough to expose their indecent acts to those who know them and teach them a good lesson!

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

I guess you are reacting this way becos you lost too much money over the weekend either on EPL or putting your money wrongly on the goondu ferrari team.

[snowball]

is that a new Kid's game?

[Guest The Wanderer]

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

It\'s your prerogative if you\'ve been hurt as a 3rd party. Otherwise, there\'s no need to step up to the plate as a moral police.

[GachiMuchi]

OK, by doing such things you want to accumulate Karma points? And your objective is.................to punished those unfaithful bf................and.......you feel good......at what you would have accomplished................and.........................you sleep better at night knowing that all those guys are punished......and they deserves it............rite? and you think you will be doing everyone a favour?

hmm.....I can only say 吃饱没事干！

[snowball]

GM, -ExposeThem- sure has his own reasons to have this type of thinking, but before we help him, don't you think he should PM all BW members with a long name lists with pics & let us know which couples into "monogamous" relationship? think he must join as a BW member first

[Guest hstnasia]

Well, my point of views on this:

Legal's: I believed the guy you exposed can easily sue your pants of your arse if he wants to pursue you.

Karma's: Who are we to play God? These cheaters will one day get their own taste of medicine or being caught cheating by someone whom they may hope to settle with and that day will be the day Karma is getting back at them, naturally, isn't it? Besides, whatever religious you're in, I'm sure your God won't encourage revenge.

Grown man's: Come on, let's move on. You are being cheated on, so what? Big deal!! move on. It's not as if you're so unattractive to get yourself a new guy and have to weep over that SOB who cheated on you. It's like come crying like a little girl to the whole world by announcing that "Hey, everyone listen, my partner cheated on me... now I must cry foul and expose him". Not quite a "Man" way of handling this kind of situation isn't it. It's more like a "Boy" way to me.

People who care shite about this's: Simple, "LOSER". You're announcing to the whole world that you simply just can't keep your man with you.

I understand how you feel when you're being cheated as I have quite a fair share of being cheated on and for one case, I caught him while he's actually "AT IT..." and another case, I dated a guy who actually cheated on a friend of my friend which ironically, we happened to talk about it and profiled the same guy. In all cases, I moved on and leave the "BASTARD" behind. The best revenge is to make those Jerks feel that they'd lost something good that they will never get it back, so spend time making yourself look delicious rather than finding way to get back at someone.

[Guest FattChoy88]

Speaking of Cheaters.... just caught this on the tube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=razxg6KSD-o

================

2nd link deleted by Gachi.

[Guest -snowball-]

-ExposeThem- , i have some words for you, words within my heart, i did ever caught guy that i stay almost 3 years brought the third party back home for sex, when i back he quicky locked the room & off the light, i have the key & know what's going on, i never used it to open the door but stay at the other room.

I know the pains, cos i even caught him going with same guy on bed again & again & oversea etc, when the trust is no longer there, when his love change, either you try to adjust yourself, blindfold yourself or leave him, it's hurt & kill, but when u understand, you will forgive everything, maybe this pain will deep inside you forever or for a long time, but learnt to be strong, understand that nothing is forever, thanks him, that's life, memories good or bad, they just a part in your life, treasure & learnt from them, each one is your teacher, don't bring hates, cos it lead you to no where, have faith & forgive & move on, cheers

[UFO]

It seem that is all about mindset... not gay life is like that or like this... Mindset

Edited September 30, 2008 by gachi_muchi

[Guest lazyman]

well said. That is why some people say human beings are the most complex or complicated animals. Our taste/preferences/interests....etc changes thru' time. I personally saw 1 guy showing so much care/love towards her girlfriend during 1st & 2nd year NTU i.e waiting at the bus stop for her, waiting at the outside of the lecture theater for her; carrying her bags, holding her hands ma jiam glue every day " feng yu bu gai" then suddenly during the 3rd year when semester started he was holding another girl's hand. all from the same class each some more and the ex gf was sitting close by !!!! So what can we say??? This not only happens to gays but also to straights...!!! Hope I didn't deviate much..

[evianguy]

Speaking of Cheaters.... just caught this on the tube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=razxg6KSD-o

================

2nd link deleted by Gachi.

Thanks for the link. This is series is so addictive... been watching them one after another. Its like watching a train wreck, you know what's going to happen, you know its going to get ugly, but you can't tear your eyes away from it.. hahaha

[evianguy]

Please don't!! Currently I am in love with someone who is attached. I asked him whether he feel guilty to his partner but he told me that I am just his fxxk buddy, so should be ok. If you expose them, their relationship may sour because of here and not because of me.

Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned,

Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned

[oralb]

ok let's take away the ethics behind this, but technically how would this work?

secret nickname?

come on, 1stly it is secret, so chances are not a lot of pple knows.

also nickname can be changed as often as one change his underwear...

so like in all trade, "let the buyer beware"

[Guest been cheated 21]

Wel I have a name here Waxxn Rxxxxr ...Stayed in Bishan and his flatmate is a gwm sm maniac. He is a hypocrite gay liar that wil show you he is a nice guy and asking for bareback fun but on the mirc tons have bb with him ...

=====================

Please don't use BW as a platform to to get back at a person by publishing names and company, you might be sued for libeling him.

Please note that, even though you post as guest. You can still be traced by the authorities if a suit is filed against you.

No one can do things to you if you know how to say NO. Make sure you learn your lesson and please go for a test if you think you might have contracted something.

Say YES to Safe Sex!

Gachi

[Guest Discloser]

Wanna warn against this guy by nick of Dxxxxx. Shall not mention his name. (but it's not real by the way) He's attached but cheating behind his bf and still cheating on others outside, thinking that noone will ever find out.

[reflection]

Seems like this thread has become a place for whoever cheaters to be exposed......karma

[Guest -snowball-]

i just realize that this tread getting more like a kids land, advice those small kids, if you really so kind & holy, kindly tell their boyfriend str away not here wasting people time & telling readers that you are a stubborn child that like to call papa & mama to feed you milk & food, cos by doing that, most readers oe no one also know who you refer to

[Guest Discloser]

i just realize that this tread getting more like a kids land, advice those small kids, if you really so kind & holy, kindly tell their boyfriend str away not here wasting people time & telling readers that you are a stubborn child that like to call papa & mama to feed you milk & food, cos by doing that, most readers oe no one also know who you refer to

The idea is to expose them by sharing their nickname. but without going too far to reveal their names. But I don't understand why even nicknames had to be censored. Really disappointing.

Wanna warn against this guy by nick of Dxxxxx. Shall not mention his name. (but it's not real by the way) He's attached but cheating behind his bf and still cheating on others outside, thinking that noone will ever find out.

[GachiMuchi]

The idea is to expose them by sharing their nickname. but without going too far to reveal their names. But I don't understand why even nicknames had to be censored. Really disappointing.

Discloser,

If your nickname is know by many as "Bedok Ah Gong" even though u dun use ur real name, many people will still know who u r.

Thus, I decide to remove nickname too.

Do share how you were "cheated" by Dxxxx and let others to learn a "lesson" from your experience.

Please let go and move on with your life.

Life is too short to bear grudges.

[Guest Guilty]

This topic is not necessary, how can we blame others for cheater when love is about 你情我愿. If the wife is not unhappy that mistress existed in their gay relationship, we should let matter rest and not blow it out into hate and guilt...which may end up messing a relationship instead of maintaining a peaceful status quo. Lets move on.

[like wind]

if you want to, just kill the cheater. Exposing them is nothing. If you really want to teach them a lesson, make it an unforgettable one for them.

[Guest Karma]

I believe karma exist. And to those that cheat karma will hit back on them 1 day where it will be too late for them to cry regrets. This circle is simply too small for anyone to think he can hide his little secrets of sexual escapades outside. New nicks, new websites but still someone will talk and there your little discreet acts will become open secrets to many, and that does not rule out the loving bf you think you can safely cheat behind his back from. So if you choose to cheat, do be prepared to lose what you have with your partner.

[doncoin]

I always believe that cheating involves getting caught. So if you caught for cheating that makes you a bad cheater.

Cheating is more than just sex. In a relationship, couples need to define what cheating means to them. I.e. A one night stand with some random guy on a business trip may not be cheating. But more than 2x with the same guy may be considered so. So couples need to draw the boundaries and figure out what works for them. Just be realistic and honest about it. I think often we narrow down the act of cheating with sex. Emotional infidelities exist as well. I.e. Not being honest with your bf/ partner is an example.

If you love someone but you do enjoy a stranger every now and then, be honest about it. There is nothing wrong with owning up to who you are and your imperfections. Just be adult with the whole thing and handle the consequences like one. A couple needs to be realistic, especially when both are men. You behave like one and you will think like one. I think guys need to accept that just because I f@cked someone else once on a business trip does not mean that I love you less.

At the end of it, it is just sex. I had a physical need, I needed release, you were not there, the opportunity presented itself. I behaved and acted on my needs.

Edited October 15, 2008 by chelseasian

[Guest Cherish]

My take: why not rechannel your lust and fantasies onto your love one and rekindle the fire to take the relationship to the next stage rather then engaging in cheating activities that will only bring down the relationship?

[Guest akasha]

OK, by doing such things you want to accumulate Karma points? And your objective is.................to punished those unfaithful bf................and.......you feel good......at what you would have accomplished................and.........................you sleep better at night knowing that all those guys are punished......and they deserves it............rite? and you think you will be doing everyone a favour?

hmm.....I can only say 吃饱没事干！

more like self-righteousness lah. haha

[Frogprince]

Maybe sometimes there are people who has knowledge of their partner's infidelity but chosen not to face it. Why force them to face it, let others have a choice to their lives. Worse still if someone with ill intention gives the wrong information..

[thaiboyz]

Why have to be so gay po ? If he choose to have fun behind his lover(s) back, thats his decision. You are just one of his fling and have the right to decide whether you want to have fun with him or stop immediately after knowing his status. I dun see the purpose of exposing someone....Hmm so that he can stop cheating ? Or you will get some forms of rewards ? Have better things to do in life lah... :twisted:

Edited November 6, 2008 by thaiboyz

[harylok]

These cheaters deserve to be taught a good lesson. How do you guys think?

Just out of curiosity, I have a few questions for you:

1. How many "Cheaters" have you exposed so far?

2. How close are you with the cheater's bf ?

3. How do you feel after you expose "The Cheaters"?

4. Do you know what is the outcome between the "Cheater & his bf, thereafter?

5. Anymore follow up action from you?

Your answer will give me further thoughts .....

Hary

... 眼睛睁一只　嘴巴呼一呼

... 耳朵遮一遮　皆大欢喜也

... 知之为知之　在乎不在乎

... 袖手旁观者　你我　是也

[Guest iamnotplastickbag]

I found out my bf had gay profile and is looking for sex with men discreetly, his profile stated he's single.

Apparently he has a regular sex buddy (the same guy) and when I am away working or overseas, they had sex at our place (well the house is not mine but I am staying in my bf's house). How do I know? I put a spy software on his laptop and read the conversation logs.

What advises can the members or non members here share. Tx.

[Guest let me share]

I found out my bf had gay profile and is looking for sex with men discreetly, his profile stated he's single.

Apparently he has a regular sex buddy (the same guy) and when I am away working or overseas, they had sex at our place (well the house is not mine but I am staying in my bf's house). How do I know? I put a spy software on his laptop and read the conversation logs.

What advises can the members or non members here share. Tx.

Let me share some points :

1. You are a freaking idiot who invades the privacy of others by putting spy software in someone else's laptop. If he trusted u to let u use HIS laptop and u put something like that into HIS laptop, you are downright despicable. If it were YOUR laptop and he uses it, then its your perrogative...not putting it on HIS laptop.

2. Maybe he is lacking something. If he has flings its ok (to me). But if he has someone regular, it means this regular is giving him something you can't.

3. If you are unhappy, talk it out with him. If it doesn't work, break up.

[Guest love & lust]

Let me share some points :

1. You are a freaking idiot who invades the privacy of others by putting spy software in someone else's laptop. If he trusted u to let u use HIS laptop and u put something like that into HIS laptop, you are downright despicable. If it were YOUR laptop and he uses it, then its your perrogative...not putting it on HIS laptop.

2. Maybe he is lacking something. If he has flings its ok (to me). But if he has someone regular, it means this regular is giving him something you can't.

3. If you are unhappy, talk it out with him. If it doesn't work, break up.

I think in a gay relationship, one cant really expect it to be monogamous. I'm sure there are monogamous relationship around, but what I'm saying is that most guys would have at one time or other did it with some other guys while still in a relationship.

That doesn't mean he doesn't love his partner, it was a moment of lust. Its very important to differentiate lust from love.

[Guest oh no]

I think in a gay relationship, one cant really expect it to be monogamous.

Fully agree. I was miserable b4 as my bf while with me -- he is still keeping an open relationship with his ex. Finally, I "exploded" in front of him ..... I simply told him that his retribution will arrive soon. I enjoy everyday to my fullest with other friends and just left him behind my mind ..... that in fact had made him worried and tried to patch things up with me.