worldangel Posted March 4 Report Share Posted March 4 Joke: A man has six children and is... A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home now, 'Mother of six?'" His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of four." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 4 Report Share Posted March 4 Joke: Generation gap? During one "generation gap" quarrel with his parents young Michael cried, "I want excitement, adventure, money, and beautiful women. I'll never find it here at home, so I'm leaving. Don't try and stop me!" With that he headed toward the door. His father rose and followed close behind. "Didn't you hear what I said? I don't want you to try and stop me." "Who's trying to stop you?" replied his father. "If you wait a minute, I'll go with you." 20wannajotgt 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 4 Report Share Posted March 4 Joke: I will grant you three wishes . . . maybe!? An older couple were walking on a beach when the husband tripped over a bottle and a genie came out. “You can each have one wish,” said the genie. The wife made her wish first “I would like to travel around the world, with my husband,”. Suddenly there appeared in her hand two tickets for travel around the world. Now it was the husbands turn, “Well” said the husband, with a naughty look on his face “I wish I can have a younger companion,” . The words were barely out of his mouth when poof, He aged 20 years! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Joke: She Called Me Pretentious My wife just called me pretentious. I was so surprised my monocle fell out. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Joke: Two elderly gentlemen Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement centre, were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: "John, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?" John says, "I feel just like a newborn baby." "Really!? Like a newborn baby!?" "Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just pooped my pants." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Joke: The will to live A man went to his lawyer and said "I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it." The lawyer says "No problem, leave it all to me". The man looks somewhat upset ... "Well, I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but I'd like to leave a little to my children too! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 6 Report Share Posted March 6 Joke: Coffee Maker The newlywed went to the store to ask how to operate the new coffeemaker received as a wedding gift. The salesman carefully explained how everything worked; how to plug it in, set the timer, go to bed, and upon rising, the coffee is ready. A few weeks later the goober was back in the store and the salesman asked her how she liked the coffee maker. "Wonderful!" she replied, "But... it's just awfully inconvenient to have to go to bed every time I want to make a pot of coffee." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Friday at 02:58 PM Report Share Posted Friday at 02:58 PM Joke: The Sentence A schoolteacher asked her primary six class to construct sentences with the words: defeat, detail, defence. There was a pause before a pupil raised his hand and said he could make a sentence with them; "The cow jumped over defence and detail went over defeat." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Friday at 02:59 PM Report Share Posted Friday at 02:59 PM Joke: A drunk driver is stopped for... A drunk driver is stopped for heading the wrong way on a one-way street. The police officer asked the driver, "Didn't you see the arrows?" The drunk responds, "Arrows? I couldn't even see the Tribe man." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Friday at 03:00 PM Report Share Posted Friday at 03:00 PM Joke: Pizza Coupon Dispatching her ten-year-old son to pick up a pizza, my sister handed him money and a two-dollar coupon. Later he came home with the pizza and the coupon. When asked to explain, he replied, "Mom, I had enough money. I didn't need the coupon." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Friday at 03:00 PM Report Share Posted Friday at 03:00 PM Joke: I Need A Mouse Trap A woman rushes into a hardware store and says, “Can I have a mouse trap, please? And will you be quick, I’ve got a bus to catch!” “Sorry, ma’am,” said the store clerk, “but we don’t sell ‘em that big!” yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Saturday at 01:24 PM Report Share Posted Saturday at 01:24 PM Joke: One day a little girl was watching ... One day a little girl was watching her mom make a roast beef. She cut off the ends, wrapped it in string, seasoned it and set it in the roasting pan. The little girl asked her mom why she cut off the ends of the roast. Mom replied, after some thought, that it was the way that her mother had done it. That night grandma came to dinner and the little girl and her mom went to her and asked why she had cut the end off of the roast before cooking. After some thought grandma replied, that was the way her mother had done it. Now great grandmother was quite old and in a nursing home. But the little girl went with her mom and grandma to see her and again asked the question. Grandma looked at them a bit annoyed and said, "So it would fit in the pan, of course." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Saturday at 01:25 PM Report Share Posted Saturday at 01:25 PM Joke: The Diving Board A man was on the very top diving board of a swimming pool. He was poised, he lifted his arms, and was about to dive in when the attendant came running up, shouting, “Don’t dive, there’s no water in that pool!” “That’s all right!” said the man. “I can’t swim!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Saturday at 01:26 PM Report Share Posted Saturday at 01:26 PM Joke: Pick-up line A man sees a gorgeous and sexy woman standing alone at a bar. After tossing back a couple of shots he gets the nerve to approach her and says: "Hi, I was going to tell you a joke about my penis, but it's too long." The woman looks at him for a moment and replies: "What a coincidence. I was going to tell you a joke about my ass, but you'll never get it." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Saturday at 01:26 PM Report Share Posted Saturday at 01:26 PM Joke: Specimen Bottle Steve had been in the hospital for days. His nurse was extremely annoying and he couldn't take much more. One day during breakfast, he took his apple juice container and used poured it into a urine specimen cup the nurse had insisted he fill. The nurse came in to check on him and looked at the specimen glass. In her annoying voice, she snickered, "It seems we are a little cloudy today." Steve put on his angry face, snatched the bottle out of her hand and drank it down in a few quick gulps, saying, "Well, I'll run it through again and maybe it will come out clearer this time." yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Sunday at 02:26 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 02:26 PM Joke: Did You Pose for That? A man sees a picture of his wife in the nude hanging at an art show and demands of her, "Did you really pose for that?" "Don’t be ridiculous," she replies. "Of course not. The artist painted it from memory." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Sunday at 02:27 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 02:27 PM Joke: Big Game Hunting A big game hunter goes on safari with his wife and his mother-in-law. One morning, the wife wakes up to find her mother gone. Immediately, she awakens up her husband and they both set off to find the older woman. Suddenly, they break into a clearing and there's the mother-in-law, standing face-to-face with a ferocious lion! "Quick, darling," the wife shouts frantically, "Do something!" "Oh, no," the husband says, "That lion got himself into this mess. Let him get himself out!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Sunday at 02:27 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 02:27 PM Joke: If He Can Screw One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th-floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defence. "Your Honour," she began cooly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly!" yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:43 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:43 PM Joke: My Dad Scribbles Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50." The second boy says, "That's nothing. My dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, and they give him $100." The third boy says, "I got you both beat! My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a 'Sermon' and it takes eight people to collect all the money!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:44 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:44 PM Joke: Meet A Beautiful Young Woman A frog called the Psychic hotline and was told, You are going to meet a beautiful young woman who will want to know everything about you." The frog said, "That’s great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?" "No," replied the psychic. "Next semester in biology class." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:45 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:45 PM Joke: Okay To Marry Joe A husband calls for his wife on his deathbed. He tells his wife that after the passes away he doesn’t want her to be alone. “Six months after I pass, I think it would be okay for you to marry Joe.” “Joe?” his wife asks. “But I thought you hated Joe?” “I do,” the man answers. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Joke: Hairy Underarms A woman with really hairy underarms boards a crowded bus. Unable to find a seat, she settles for hanging onto one of the poles. A drunken man next to her stares for a few minutes, and then he says, “I love a woman that does aerobics.” The woman replies angrily, “I do not do aerobics!” The man then looks at the woman and says, “Then how did you get your leg up so high?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 23 hours ago Report Share Posted 23 hours ago Joke: Super Sex!!! A woman, completely fed up with her husband's on-line obsession, finally takes matters into her own hands. One night, as he is sitting at the computer, she goes into the bedroom, takes off all her clothes, puts on a full length mink coat, and posts herself between her husband and the monitor. She pulls open the coat and yells, "Time for Super Sex!!!" He ignores her. So, she repeatedly yells, "Super Sex", "Super Sex", "Super Sex". Finally, he replies, "Ok, Ok, I'll take the soup". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 23 hours ago Report Share Posted 23 hours ago Joke: A college student picked up his... A college student picked up his date at her parent’s home. He'd scraped together every cent he had to take her to a fancy restaurant. To his dismay, she ordered almost everything expensive on the menu. Appetizers, lobster, champagne. . .the works. Finally, he asked her, "Does your Mother feed you like this at home?" "No," she said, "but my Mother's not looking to get laid, either." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 23 hours ago Report Share Posted 23 hours ago Joke: A little girl is sitting on her... A little girl is sitting on her grandpa's lap and studying the wrinkles on his old face. She gets up the nerve to rub her fingers over the wrinkles. Then she touches her own face and looks more puzzled. Finally the little girl asks, "Grandpa, did the Heaven make you?" "He sure did honey, a long time ago," replies her grandpa. "Well, did the Heaven make me?" asks the little girl. "Yes, He did, and that wasn't too long ago," answers her grandpa. "Boy," says the little girl, "He's sure doing a lot better job these days isn't He?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 23 hours ago Report Share Posted 23 hours ago Joke: How Much Do You Love Me? A girl asks a boy, "Peter, how much do you love me?" The boy looks her in the eyes, "Look up at the stars, that's how much I love you." The girl is confused, “But it’s morning, there are no stars?” Boy nods, "Exactly." yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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