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Joke: Here I Sit Constipated


Here I sit so constipated, my guts are tightly hyper inflated.

My ass is rapidly numbing, the extractor fan impatiently humming.

Anytime now that turd will come, and rupture the muscles of my BUM!

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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Joke: The 4-Storey Building 


There was a 4-storey building.

The guy on the 4th floor liked to throw knives out the window.

The guy on the 3rd floor liked to stick his meat out the window.

The guy on the 2nd, floor liked to paint things green.

And the guy on the 1st floor liked pickles.

You do the math!

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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Joke: The Mad Cow


A couple goes to a restaurant. The waiter approaches the table to take their order.

“I’ll have the biggest, juiciest steak on the menu,” says the husband.

"But sir, what about the mad cow?” asks the waiter.

“Oh,” says the man, “she’ll order for herself.”

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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Joke: Ready To Retire

After 37 years I’m finally ready to retire with $5,000,000 I’ve accumulated through hard work, careful saving, living a life of simple means…

 

And the death of an uncle who left me $4,999,996.50.

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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Joke: Guide Dogs

Two men are walking their dogs (a doberman and a chihuahua) when they see a restaurant.

 

They’re pretty hungry, so they decide to head in for a bite to eat. Unfortunately, they see a sign out front that says “NO DOGS ALLOWED”.

 

The man with the doberman says “I know what to do, just follow my lead.” He throws on a pair of sunglasses and walks in.

 

The waiter tells him “I’m sorry sir, we don’t allow dogs here.” The man says “Oh, you don’t understand. I’m blind and this is my guide dog.”

“A doberman for a guide dog?” The waiter asks, skeptical.

 

“Yes.” The man replies. “Dobermans are very loyal. They’re easy to train and protective too. They’re born for the job.”

 

The waiter sighs and leads the man to a table.

The second man, excited by this idea, throws on his sunglasses and walks in.

 

The waiter tells him “I’m sorry sir, we don’t allow dogs here.” The man says “Oh, you don’t understand. I’m blind and this is my guide dog.”

“A chihuahua for a guide dog?” The waiter asks.

 

“A chihuahua?” The man asks. “They gave me a chihuahua?!”

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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Joke: Corruption Defined

A little girl asks her father, “Daddy, what is corruption?”

 

Her dad replies, “Go bring me a beer and I’ll tell you.”

 

The girl says, “But mommy said you should stop drinking!”

 

The dad says, “Get yourself an ice-cream too while you bring me that beer.”

 

The girl says, “Oh, okay!”

a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"

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