Jealousy Help Please :(

[Guest Subway]

Hi. I really don't know who else I can confide to except here, where I think is safe and fruitful to share my trouble with..

I find myself really an emotional person. I get jealousy easily.

Heres the case..

I met this young russian guy on romeo, he is totally HOT and ADORABLE, just like one of those hollywood celebrity, a slight resemblance to Shia LaBeouf but he is younger, 25, much cuter with the tan golden skin and a smaller face, grey eyes and his nose is just so cute!

We was hitting off really well, laughing at jokes and sharing about our life etc etc then slowly we went to the bed and had sex. I did things I never did. I am a bottom and for the first time, I went kissing, licking sucking him ALL OVER like a rapist. I never did that with any guys I met before and the most surprising thing is I actually rimmed him and place my dick on his ass and hug him from his back and hump my dick up and down at his ass.

I don't do that at all with any other guys, just him, which is so weird and unexpected of me. He smells good too and it keep me going and going and i was literally hungry that I bite and suck his butt cheeks and stuffed my whole face into his ass!

We even laughed during the sex and it was like 'laughing out loud' those kind, he was so adorable! It was good sex.

Then it continued and he fxxked me and everything like how it usually go. I slept over at his place and back my house in the morning.

After that first met, we have been contacting each other and I really like him, so I will ask him things like "Met any hot guys today?", or something erotic just to catch his attention and have him replying me back or maybe you can say checking if he is meeting any new guys or not..

Few days later, we met again. When we went to his room, he used his computer and he was on romeo website and he was telling me how hot this particular guy was and he really wanted to meet him and his face is so full of eagerness to get him. My heart literally broke. I felt sad and I don't know why!

Then he went to get a shower first and I know this is wrong but I sneak into his conversation with the guy and I saw all the things they were talking about.

The attitude was totally different. The words he used, the tone and everything is different like what he wrote to me. His writing is more passionate to the guy than what he wrote to me. I felt so jealous!!!!!!!!

But they didn't met yet, as the guy was busy working and I remembered one sentence the russian guy wrote to him was " Text me anytime, I will be free the whole day for you." I was so hurt. I wonder why..

I quickly close the conversation and get to the bed when I heard the water stop. Then we chatted again and we had sex shortly and then slept over at his house again.

The next morning, I asked him what is he doing for the day and he says nothing much etc etc then being the jealousy sour grape, I asked him " Not gonna meet that hot guy you wanted eh?" Then he said " Well, we were actually going to meet but our schedule clashes so hopefully.. yeah "

I was really really stabbed deep in my heart. Then I just went back home with a heavy jealousy mindset.

I mean I don't know why I get JEALOUS over something I SHOULDN'T be getting jealous with. Is this normal?

He is a STRANGER to me that had sex with me, not my property or boyfriend or anything. I will always message him something funny to get him to reply and thinking of him I will just scream happily in my heart and saying " omg he is so cute blah blah blah "

I know maybe one of the main reason is because he is so fxxking fine looking, but I also had experience with another guy where I get jealous with.

I met a German guy and we had sex a couple of times, and one day I wanted to meet him again but he said he isn't free as he had a date or something. I then send him a sour grape message " A hot guy from romeo huh? "

I just get jealous so easily that it turns me into a selfish guy that doesn't want the guys I met to meet a different guy!

My heart felt like someone is pinching it crudely whenever I think of that and I want to meet that guy again so badly, his face is never enough for me to admire at.

What should I do? Am I falling in love with him or what? I'm only 19 and don't really have much experience.

Somebody help me!

[minejastr0]

The reason is because he is too good looking and u cant let go of him i suppose? Just get over it. I mean u can also go and find other guys right? Hot guys are wanted by many thats why they cant just stick to one guy u see. Its normal. And its normal for u to get jealous.

Edited June 26, 2011 by minejastr0

[winterboy]

u're making your life complicated... first, define your relationship with him... i'm quite sure that u've fallen in love for him... so, either u tell him that u wana start up with him.. or forget about him before it's too late..

[briax]

If you want a hopelessly blunt answer, then my answer to you is "Once you go through these a few times, you will realise how you want to do this game thing. You continue to play the game and feel numb being the dumper or dumpee or you find someone stable to settle down and stop playing game."

But winterboy has stated it clearly, you did not define the relationship with him. He could be seeing you as a friend with benefit, or fxxk buddy or a very long and extended one night stand when you are feeling so connected to him. Be also very clear if you are in love with him, or you are just infatuated with him.

In any case, I hope your sex with him is safe and protected, it is very tempting for bottoms to do it raw with a guy who he fancied a lot. I have been through that stage before, thinking that the person is my boyfriend and to have sex with him, especially bareback is showing my love towards him.

Edited June 26, 2011 by briax

[jonjon]

i guess if that guy is really that good looking..u got to accept this..if u are in love with him (which i think u are) i suggest you tell yourself not to before it is too late

and this reaction is very normal:)

[Guest Just a Toy]

Simply put...you've found a toy that you like and you're not willing to share it. Remember...a toy brings only short term comfort but not long term happiness.

[boyfren]

blah blah... I don't want to share. blah blah... I am the world.

You are already so possessive and jealous over strangers, I pity anyone who will be your boyfriend.

[TheVisitors]

You know, one of the recent thread says -Gays are Superficial -

In conjunction with your text, it clearly shows another side of this superficiality.

That Gay People like you like to possess nice looking things.....and people...exclusively for themselves.

Well the next time when a guy you have met, and had sex with, goes on talking about other guys, or , describes right in front of your face, how hot he thinks another guy is, other than talking about you, be smart and get the hint....he doesn't want you around anymore, nor will he advance further with you, to treat you a bit more seriously.

You are the problem, not them.

[abang]

Wake up, you had sex with this Russian lad and despite the wonderful sex/time you had together, it was purely physical. There was never a hint of emotional connection.

You got to know that he is not yours.

He has the $!^*| right to 'hunt'.

Time for you to move on....