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I have a not so clean personal past/ personal history in life but that doesn't mean I have zero rights to have another a chance to learn from my mistakes, meet new friends, fall in love and die happily. 

 

I just wish people give me the support I need in life. I am young and reckless. I made mistakes sometimes. I really wish people around me and give me the support I need to get back up again. :( 

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29 minutes ago, Sybilism said:

I have a not so clean personal past/ personal history in life but that doesn't mean I have zero rights to have another a chance to learn from my mistakes, meet new friends, fall in love and die happily. 

 

I just wish people give me the support I need in life. I am young and reckless. I made mistakes sometimes. I really wish people around me and give me the support I need to get back up again. :( 

 

Aww, there there. Did you kill someone?

 

 

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5 minutes ago, EasleyLim said:

Accepting their fault could be part of the process that goes into fixing it tho.

 

It is. The first step to fixing. Don't think one will try to fix something if they deny it as their mistake. That one's charity liao.

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52 minutes ago, Sybilism said:

I have a not so clean personal past/ personal history in life but that doesn't mean I have zero rights to have another a chance to learn from my mistakes, meet new friends, fall in love and die happily. 

 

I just wish people give me the support I need in life. I am young and reckless. I made mistakes sometimes. I really wish people around me and give me the support I need to get back up again. :( 

 

hey buddy, from what i gather, you are the biggest obstacle to your own problem.

You don't even dare to talk about the issue and drag up painful memories.

Learn to forgive yourself first, no one is perfect including yourself. 

All other things will fall in place once you have overcome yourself.

we are all just a PM away should you need a listening ear. Cheer up and be strong.  

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13466016_1193853974035284_58335478681802

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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Please BE VERY CAREFUL. There are still underage in this forum. Just contacted by a 16 years old member. 

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13450094_10156975346355104_6240072183928

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13428510_1195870143833667_73217581873761

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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http://www.techinsider.io/herbivore-men-in-japan-are-not-having-sex-8-15

 

'Herbivore men' could be the reason nobody's having sex in Japan

 

Only 1.001 million babies were born in Japan in 2014 - a record low - and 1.269 million people died.

That's an overall loss of 268,000 people, and a signal of a population crisis in one of the world's most developed and debt-ridden economies.

And people are trying to figure out why.

One debated factor is the rise ofsōshoku-kei danshi, or "herbivore men," a term coined in 2006 by columnist Maki Fukasawa.

"In Japan, sex is translated as 'relationship in flesh,'" she told CNN in 2009, "so I named those boys 'herbivorous boys' since they are not interested in flesh."

Herbivores are increasingly present in Japan, according to a 2015 survey of 1,134 people 16 to 49, as reported on in The Japan Times.

"Among male respondents, 17.9 percent reported little or no interest in having sex - or even an extreme dislike of it," The Japan Times reports. "The proportion came to 20.3 percent for men between 25 and 29, up 2.5-fold from the level in 2008."

At a macro level, it's understandably troubling. When 48% of men and 50% of women report not having had sex in the past month, it's not going to help the "demographic time bomb"that's coming toward the country.

The lack of ardor may be related to the fact that, like many societies, Japan struggles with mental health.

It's notoriously hard to measure. A 2013 study showed that Japan has the lowest clinical-depression diagnosis rate in the world, though some critics think that's because of a lack of recognition of the "clinical" aspect of depression.

The country's notoriously long work hours - think 80-hour weeks - appear to also have an effect on sexuality. Over 20% of the married men in the Japan Times study said they weren't interested in sex because they were too tired from work.

But on the other hand, the "herbivorization" may also represent a revolution of identity politics in the island country.

Herbivore men "have some feelings of revulsion towards the older generation," Fukasawa said in another interview. "They don't want to have the same lives. And the impact of the herbivores on the economy is very big. They're such big news now because sales are down, especially of status products like cars and alcohol."

And as with all good buzzwords, the "herbivore" terminology has given rise to an entire range of heterosexual identifications.

Japan Times blogger Rebecca Milner supplies a taxonomy:

  • nikushoku-kei danshi (肉食系男子; carnivore guys): Classic macho guys who go after what and who they want.
  • sōshoku-kei danshi (草食系男子; herbivore guys): Shy guys who don't make a move. They are prey for the growing number of nikushoku-kei josei (carnivore girls).
  • roru kyabetsu danshi (ロールキャベツ男子; roll-cabbage guys): Guys who appear to be herbivores but are actually carnivore to the core. They are named for the classic yōshoku - Japanese-style western food - dish of cooked cabbage stuffed with meat.
  • asupara bēkon-maki danshi (アスパラベーコン巻き男子; bacon-wrapped asparagus guys): Guys who come across as carnivores but later reveal themselves to be herbivores. Named for the yakitori dish.
  • zasshoku-kei danshi (雑食系男子; omnivorous guys): Guys who will go with whatever works.
  • zesshoku-kei danshi (絶食系男子; fasting guys): Guys with zero interest in women.

But here's the thing: While this may be imprinting Western ideals on Japanese culture, it does seem that all these herbivores serve a long-term good.

If we hold that people should be able to express their sexual orientation in the ways that they identify as - opposite-sex or same-sex, sexual or asexual - then the rise of the herbivores is progress, a liberalization from the strictness of hypermasculine "salarymen" that have been conferred alpha status in Japan since World War II.

Identity progress is slow going in Japan. It's a country that is just beginning to have a national LGBTQ conversation, and it went into a racist tizzy about Miss Universe Japan 2015, who is biracial.

So while "herbivorization" might be a problem for getting the birthrate up, it's the start of an answer as far as gender and sexuality are concerned.

 

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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http://oliveremberton.com/2014/the-problem-isnt-that-life-is-unfair-its-your-broken-idea-of-fairness/

 

Quote

The problem isn’t that life is unfair – it’s your broken idea of fairness

Unless you’re winning, most of life will seem hideously unfair to you.

 

The truth is, life is just playing by different rules.

The real rules are there. They actually make sense. But they’re a bit more complicated, and a lot less comfortable, which is why most people never manage to learn them.

Let’s try.

Rule #1: Life is a competition

That business you work for? Someone’s trying to kill it. That job you like? Someone would love to replace you with a computer program. That girlfriend / boyfriend / high-paying job / Nobel Prize that you want? So does somebody else.

We’re all in competition, although we prefer not to realise it. Most achievements are only notable relative to others. You swam more miles, or can dance better, or got more Facebook Likes than the average. Well done.

It’s a painful thing to believe, of course, which is why we’re constantly assuring each other the opposite. “Just do your best”, we hear. “You’re only in competition with yourself”. The funny thing about platitudes like that is they’re designed to make you try harder anyway. If competition really didn’t matter, we’d tell struggling children to just give up.

Fortunately, we don’t live in a world where everyone has to kill each other to prosper. The blessing of modern civilisation is there’s abundant opportunities, and enough for us all to get by, even if we don’t compete directly.

But never fall for the collective delusion that there’s not a competition going on. People dress up to win partners. They interview to win jobs. If you deny that competition exists, you’re just losing. Everything in demand is on a competitive scale. And the best is only available to those who are willing to truly fight for it.

Rule #2. You’re judged by what you do, not what you think

Society judges people by what they can do for others. Can you save children from a burning house, or remove a tumour, or make a room of strangers laugh? You’ve got value right there.

That’s not how we judge ourselves though. We judge ourselves by ourthoughts.

“I’m a good person”. “I’m ambitious”. “I’m better than this.” These idle impulses may comfort us at night, but they’re not how the world sees us. They’re not even how we see other people.

Well-meaning intentions don’t matter. An internal sense of honour and love and duty count for squat. What exactly can you and have you done for the world?

Abilities are not prized by their virtue. Whatever admiration society awards us, comes from the selfish perspectives of others. A hard working janitor is less rewarded by society than a ruthless stockbroker. A cancer researcher is rewarded less than a supermodel. Why? Because those abilities are rarer and impact more people.

We like to like to think that society rewards those who do the best work. Like so:

.

Graph-1-1600x1200.png

.

But in reality, social reward is just a network effect. Reward comes down mostly to the number of people you impact:

.

Graph-2-1600x1200.png

.

Write an unpublished book, you’re nobody. Write Harry Potter and the world wants to know you. Save a life, you’re a small-town hero, but cure cancer and you’re a legend. Unfortunately, the same rule applies to alltalents, even unsavoury ones: get naked for one person and you might just make them smile, get naked for fifty million people and you might just be Kim Kardashian.

You may hate this. It may make you sick. Reality doesn’t care. You’re judged by what you have the ability to do, and the volume of people you can impact. If you don’t accept this, then the judgement of the world will seem very unfair indeed.

Rule #3. Our idea of fairness is self interest

People like to invent moral authority. It’s why we have referees in sports games and judges in courtrooms: we have an innate sense of right and wrong, and we expect the world to comply. Our parents tell us this. Our teachers teach us this. Be a good boy, and have some candy.

But reality is indifferent. You studied hard, but you failed the exam. You worked hard, but you didn’t get promoted. You love her, but she won’t return your calls.

 

The problem isn’t that life is unfair; it’s your broken idea of fairness.

Take a proper look at that person you fancy but didn’t fancy you back. That’s a complete person. A person with years of experience being someone completely different to you. A real person who interacts with hundreds or thousands of other people every year.

Now what are the odds that among all that, you’re automatically their first pick for love-of-their-life? Because – what – you exist? Because you feel something for them? That might matter to you, but their decision is not about you.

Similarly we love to hate our bosses and parents and politicians. Their judgements are unfair. And stupid. Because they don’t agree with me! And they should! Because I am unquestionably the greatest authority on everything ever in the whole world!

It’s true there are some truly awful authority figures. But they’re not all evil, self-serving monsters trying to line their own pockets and savour your misery. Most are just trying to do their best, under different circumstances to your own.

Maybe they know things you don’t – like, say, your company will go bust if they don’t do something unpopular. Maybe they have different priorities to you – like, say, long term growth over short term happiness.

But however they make you feel, the actions of others are not some cosmic judgement on your being. They’re just a byproduct of being alive.

Why life isn’t fair

Our idea of fairness isn’t actually obtainable. It’s really just a cloak for wishful thinking.

 

Can you imagine how insane life would be if it actually was ‘fair’ to everyone? No-one could fancy anyone who wasn’t the love of their life, for fear of breaking a heart. Companies would only fail if everyone who worked for them was evil. Relationships would only end when both partners died simultaneously. Raindrops would only fall on bad people.

Most of us get so hung up on how we think the world should work that we can’t see how it does. But facing that reality might just be the key to unlocking your understanding of the world, and with it, all of your potential.

 

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13439150_962059473892067_766924676709221

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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1009781_212479105573593_665398827_n.jpg?

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13557676_10153619845786512_2917169976129

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13607053_936632703114110_477903830728882

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13626999_927082024104471_241053356385587

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13332824_997925680315472_641098509779550

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13615509_939177276192986_897980711969028

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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image_zps4tmgjjmz.jpeg

Thou I also don't think what the teacher did was right but according to the article both mother and dad of child claimed that their child had been humiliated. Yet, the dad posted incident on FB and according to article had been reshared 2,000 times since. Hey dad, you need maths lesson to calculate the equation of number of classmate vs number of reshared?

 

image_zpspzygloyv.jpeg

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13769520_1101562706591325_51759797463106

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13697008_1620108541613781_13877487037780

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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13731555_1201518629869668_17954706180274

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善待对人。麻烦用英文来表达信息。不是每个人都会看的懂中文 “People need to learn the art of making an argument. Often there is no

right or wrong. It's just your opinion vs someone else's opinion. How you deliver that opinion could make the difference between opening a mind,

changing an opinion or shutting the door. Sometimes folk just don't know when they've "argued" enough. Learn when to shut up."

― J'son M. Lee 

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