Of Love Struggles & Cries Of A Married Gay Man + Cheating Married Men Leading Dual Life (compiled)

[MarriedTop]

This is HOTNESS! got more details? how did u fxxk? who fxxked who?

Yeah! Would like to know as well here.

[Guest Seng]

He is top. We used hair conditioner as lub for first time. Not ideal but no choice. Damn painful for me though his tool not long but quite a fat cock with big head. I tried sit on it but not successful. Then we did doggy. He was forceful at my back so eventually pushed in. Got a bit bleeding. We finished in 5 minutes too rush but scared his wife suddenly home.

[Undies69]

He is top. We used hair conditioner as lub for first time. Not ideal but no choice. Damn painful for me though his tool not long but quite a fat cock with big head. I tried sit on it but not successful. Then we did doggy. He was forceful at my back so eventually pushed in. Got a bit bleeding. We finished in 5 minutes too rush but scared his wife suddenly home.

WOW !!! so he fxxked you bareback ? So exciting and kinky to have sex with the mind and heart pulsating very fast thinking of being caught by the family members...

you should also ask him to show you his underwear hehe

[Guest Lang]

wow Now you have to give tuition to the father too. Play safe, just dun get pregnant.

[Phil]

When I met my ex, he did not tell me that he was married. I was told that we could not meet to often due to his frequent traveling to overseas. It was only when his first child was born, he was so tied-up with his family affair and he finally admitted to me. Imagine my shock, my bf not only had a wife (3 months before we met) and had also just became a father ! He wanted to continue our relationship and begged for my forgiveness as he was under family's pressure to get married. He wanted to make me feel secured and I was being introduced to his family as a "long lost old classmate". Seeing his family - parents, wife and kid, I started to wonder how my image was to fit into their family portrait. 9 months later, I decided to end this relationship. No regret and I wish him and his family well as I am typing this.

Would your story have been different if he had been honest, informing you from the beginning about his situation?

[TheVisitors]

I give tuition to this P1 boy since early this year. His father always wears boxer only walking around at home. I can see his great body with meaty bouncing under his boxer. Once I walked pass his bedroom saw him slept with his dick sliding out from his boxer.

Just now I went to his house but his wife forgot to informed me tuition cancelled today. He was alone and he invited me in for a chat. We chat for a while then he went to his bedroom toilet. He purposely did not close the door properly for me to peep him pcc. I knew he seduced me so I walked in and we engaged in a good fxxk in toilet. Excited with fear his family might come home suddenly. But it was worth the excitement!

Are sure you are a tutor, and you expect us all to believe in your story? I don't think so.

Because, from your posting, your English standard is pretty bad.

[Guest ATAS]

Are sure you are a tutor, and you expect us all to believe in your story? I don't think so. Because, from your posting, your English standard is pretty bad.

That's why he can only teach Pr 1 only.

[Guest Guest]

Are sure you are a tutor, and you expect us all to believe in your story? I don't think so.

Because, from your posting, your English standard is pretty bad.

He could be a Maths tutor.

Why would a Primary 1 boy need a tutor anyway? Primary 1 leh, not Primary 6.

[Guest Apple]

Article from Apple Daily Taiwan. Sorry now English translation

http://tw.nextmedia....ssueID/20110901

老婆老了 我找男人填補

2011年 09月01日

Q：什麼機會讓你接觸到八大行業？

A：我已婚，有兩個小孩。50歲以前，從沒接觸過八大，50歲那年，剛好朋友介紹我到大陸旅遊，帶我去深圳的休閒會所消費。第一次進店，我以為是純按摩，都是年輕的男師傅，在一樓做完足浴，師傅問我要不要上樓，有2個小時。我搞不清楚狀況，上樓後，師傅整個人脫光幫我油壓，我才知道這是掛羊頭賣狗肉，覺得稀奇又新鮮。

著迷後，我自己又去了那家店兩趟。店裡的師傅約7、80個，現場有20幾個，其餘的就選照片，隨call隨到，全都20到30歲，男客、女客都接。男師傅多半不是同性戀，完全是為了錢，才來幹這行，離開後，百分之八十會結婚。我跟那位老闆混熟後，問他可不可以讓我付個幾10萬插暗股。我心想，生意做到大陸去，就有理由往深圳跑。

Q：為什麼想插股？

A：一方面是我在台灣做直銷生意，賺蠻多的，把現金投資在這種店，就當做賺利息錢。另個原因是我那時煞到店裡832號的男師傅。他長的很高大，又帥，跟我說他老家在湖北，自己來深圳找工作。原本一個月的工資3500人民幣，改做這至少有1萬人民幣，如果不是窮，他也不會做這。

他跟店內有些師傅一樣，不是同性戀，又要接男客，真的很累，有些做3個月就受不了。我對他的感情越來越深，每半年就飛去找他一次，都叫他，幫他衝業績。我們相好7年多，他前幾年存到錢，也結婚生小孩，他老婆也知道他在做這行，但村裡太窮，沒辦法。

虛情假意甘願被騙

Q：你們雙方老婆知道嗎？

A：全都不知道。他老婆生了2個女兒，我還包紅包給她。我老婆60幾歲了，都做阿嬤了，她也是近年需求少，我才沒跟她那個，我不需要煩惱她，我比較煩惱我自己。在台灣，我跟老婆、子女分開住，我跟兒子關係不親。我兒子能力沒有我好，讓我覺得子女不可靠，反正，我只要定期把錢拿回家就好。所以，不工作時，我常覺得很寂寞，想找人陪伴，無奈老情人又在對岸。

Q：他跟你是真感情嗎？

A：我每年都會過去幾趟，看多了做這行，大概也知道他們的話術。這些師傅都趁年輕做，做幾年就不做了，所以很懂得把握機會，明明沒那麼可憐，也把自己講得很可憐，博取同情心，客人錢就會多給。

但我越接近60歲，就越怕寂寞，我沒有地方發洩，也沒有個能陪我聊天的伴。我不會上網，只能打國際電話給他，聽他的聲音。有一個這樣的對象，像是種寄託，雖然我明知道一切都是虛假跟欺騙，我也甘願。

之前，他跟我說，他想開分店，我無條件入股，跟他又一起合開了兩家店。我還幫他找台灣這邊的客人過去玩，男女生都有。我只希望藉由生意上的往來，維持我跟他的聯繫，不管他對我是不是真的？至少，我心裡的空虛，還有個人可以填補。

[Guest Struggling married man]

I'm married and having a happy family. But I'm gay. When I'm single, I thought that after married I'll never be gay anymore.

I love men as I see them on the street. I fantasize them if they ate my type. I tried meeting few gays but they all asked for sex which I'm in it.

I don't have friends except one very good friend who is straight. He much younger than me. Sometime I think I already crossed the line that I think somehow I am over the friendship. It is not that I want to have sex with him, it is like I want to share manythings with him. But I can't do much and if I do, he will know that I'm a gay and will leave me.

Recently, my friend and I have some misunderstanding. I'm depressed with all my strugglings. I am pretending to be a happy man at home but I do not know when I will breakdown.

All the while I thought that I can have both a happy family and a good best friend. I think having a best friend in life that can share with you is never possible. Can I manage my happy family only without having friend or friends?

[tinkymale]

If your friend is straight .. You may not wanna rock the boat... Cos u never know if he can accept your incline.

I am married and I keep both sides clear and clean... It's not easy.. But you will get the hang of it soon. You just need more aj friends

[Guest Kenneth]

Take one step forward and with a sincere heart you would find there are still many caring and sincere friends who share the same inclination as you. Nothing is impossible. Be positive.

Kenneth

[DisMar75]

well price of getting married and still love man. Just need to focus one thing at a time.

[Guest Struggling Married Man]

Sorry guys

I missed out a word. I wrote " they asked for sex which I'm in it" is meant to be " I'm not in it".

[Guest Let's live]

Guess life is not easy and always he to make sacrifice.

Guess u had made an option earlier I.e. Married.

Guess u have to make another decision soon, I.e. To continue as a married man or not.....

Guess is always a big move for most of us here .........

Let's live, love, laugh and that's life.

[Guest guest]

well price of getting married and still love man. Just need to focus one thing at a time.

hi are you married?

your profile pic look tempting thou.

[suckling_pig]

I'm married and having a happy family. But I'm gay. When I'm single, I thought that after married I'll never be gay anymore. I love men as I see them on the street. I fantasize them if they ate my type. I tried meeting few gays but they all asked for sex which I'm in it. I don't have friends except one very good friend who is straight. He much younger than me. Sometime I think I already crossed the line that I think somehow I am over the friendship. It is not that I want to have sex with him, it is like I want to share manythings with him. But I can't do much and if I do, he will know that I'm a gay and will leave me. Recently, my friend and I have some misunderstanding. I'm depressed with all my strugglings. I am pretending to be a happy man at home but I do not know when I will breakdown. All the while I thought that I can have both a happy family and a good best friend. I think having a best friend in life that can share with you is never possible. Can I manage my happy family only without having friend or friends?

After reading your post carefully, there seems to be 2 things you are saying:

1. You have some gay tendency
   
2. You have been very close to a male friend, and you are having some interpersonal problem with him.
   

Since you said you did not want to have sex with him, I don't think you have any other romantic fantasy like getting married to him etc. If that is so, then item 1 and item 2 are totally unrelated.

So it seems to me that you are simply having a problem with a very close friend. Looks like you just have to speak to him frankly about it. But something is worth remembering, nobody is perfect. There is no one out there who will be so perfect, he will understand everything about you telepathically. You will have misunderstandings and arguments. The important thing is for you to show to him that you value his friendship enough to pull him aside and talk sincerely with him.

Hope this helps.

SP

Edited September 4, 2011 by suckling_pig

[snowball]

I think having a best friend in life that can share with you is never possible. Can I manage my happy family only without having friend or friends?

everyone need friend(s), friend(s) does not mean you have to meet, call or sms everyday, if both understand each other well enough, even months just greet once or twice also won't fade the friendship.

human are greedy normally won't appreciate what they have but tend to want & envy what they don't. no one able to untie your knot, only yourself, no matter what advice we give to you, if you can't " 看破 ", you will only let your " ignorance " eat you up.

do you have any kid(s)? do you take any sports? maybe is time for you to balance your family & your own private space.

Edited September 4, 2011 by snowball

[happy.99]

Morale of the story is if you r gay don't think by getting married will turn you straight

I knew it the instant when I had a girlfriend but still I yearn for man. So after careful consideration, I decide that I should choose a single gay man life.

Getting married and play outside hiding from your own family is a very hard thing to do. One day you may just lose everything.

[Guest decisionmaker]

if u don hv kids, then u must decide whether u r gay or u be str, if gay then better separate and lead a happy gay life and yr wife will hv a brand new life as well. if u hv kids, then things get little more complicated and more factors to concern abt..

Life is short, just decide wat u really want and go for it, if not time's running out soon

[Guest Guest]

if u r gay, be gay. dont chek ark go and get married just to have a heir which is an old sch mentality. not only u suffer, i pity ur wife and kids.

[Guest guest]

I agree that if you are gay , then it's better not to get married ; don't live your life with a lie througout your life !

I hate those married gays,bi etc ( whatever u called them ) who not only betray their wives by fooling outside , they also cheat the love and money of we AJs.

I had encountered 2 such ' dispicable ' married gays ( 1 from china and 1 is a local ) - so to fella AJs out there , never ever involve yourself with these married gays emotionally and financially , leave them alone as they are just pack of lies !! And don't ever lend or give them money or allow any money matters involve !

[Guest Struggling Married Man]

Guys, thanks for the inputs. Yes, I have 3 beautiful children and wife. Is not my intention to get married and to change to a straight. I have mentioned that I'm not in for sex or get any involvement in gay life.

Here, I'm sharing that I'm depressed over straight friendship that I'm having. Thanks for guys who give suggestions that may help.

[doncoin]

Do what straight guys do when they have a misunderstanding. You talk about it over couple of beers. Just be honest. No point keeping everything a secret. That usually seems to be the case with male suicide trends, but I digress.

If he is truly a friend, he will embrace you as you are and be empathetic to this large closet you have built for yourself to hide in. If he condemns and judges you, then you know he is not the kind of friend you can lean on to be supportive.

[Uji]

My advice to U is WHATEVER U DO, THINK TWICE & BE CAREFUL of what U do! Most of the straight people out there does'nt accept gay people as a friend! It's also the same for a woman who does'nt accept her husband being a gay (what I call a marry man a bisexual) if she knew. It's ok to play around, but play safe, & don't go overboard yourself. Most of my friends are bisexual with wife & children. I myself drew a line inside myself, I do not want to break up people family, when time to meet, I will meet, when time to have sex with them , I enjoy the moments together, I do not pester them & their family. Friendships shall have the freedom! As for straight man, please do not play with fire. If I were U, I rather keep the friendships. Rather than trying to confess your love to them & wanting to have sex with them will make U lose the friendships even faster. I believe there is a saying, if it's your, it were be your! In my own life, I had lose & I also have gain but I lose more than I gain! U cannot have the world world on your hands! I fall many times & I learn to stand up again! Treasure your straight friend, keep your family! Don't break up both! GOOD LUCK TO U!

[briax]

I'm married and having a happy family. But I'm gay. When I'm single, I thought that after married I'll never be gay anymore.

I love men as I see them on the street. I fantasize them if they ate my type. I tried meeting few gays but they all asked for sex which I'm in it.

I don't have friends except one very good friend who is straight. He much younger than me. Sometime I think I already crossed the line that I think somehow I am over the friendship. It is not that I want to have sex with him, it is like I want to share manythings with him. But I can't do much and if I do, he will know that I'm a gay and will leave me.

Recently, my friend and I have some misunderstanding. I'm depressed with all my strugglings. I am pretending to be a happy man at home but I do not know when I will breakdown.

All the while I thought that I can have both a happy family and a good best friend. I think having a best friend in life that can share with you is never possible. Can I manage my happy family only without having friend or friends?

Hi ya, dunno what is the main reason for you to get married so I am guessing you thought that being married will make you stop being gay or thinking of your sexuality. This is unfortunately not true and can cause you more stress when it is not going away. I know of many married gay men who went into marriage with that same idea. Societal pressure can be too much to overcome especially in the 70s and 80s. In fact, our married gay men volunteers also shared the same dilemmas. In your case, you need to weight the pros and cons on keeping the marriage and having a same sex relationship. It is a tough decision to make and situation to manage. Not all married gay men situations are the same so I doubt we can reach a one size fits all solution.

It is possible to keep to your happy family only arrangement but you need to be sure on what you are expecting from your straight best friend. Many gay men, and especially when they are closeted, can get very confused with their platonic friendship with straight men. Many developed a one sided love for these close best friends when they know it is never reciprocated. And it is a cycle that keep the gay men where they are, it is a tough fact that many find it hard to admit. Sometimes, such cycles are the best thing they can cope with, until they reach a next stage of breaking free. It is also the same cycle to make them feel inferior, unworthy and shameful because they keep loving the wrong person. In the end, they are reminded that being gay is wrong repeatedly by these failed relationships when it can be different if they invest the energy with someone who is interested in same sex relationships. This cycle happens very frequently in lesbian relationships too, so it is not a man thing.

As for the disclosure, you need to decide how your friend could react to your disclosure and your motivation of disclosure.

Some straight men can take it quite well, some dun so you might want to prepare yourself mentally you might lose a friend. What will happen if you lose him as a friend or is he a true best friend if he 'dump' you as a friend immediately if he knows the truth. A true friend cannot be one you need to pretend to be someone else.

On the flip side, it can be quite an heartwarming experience if he reacts well. In many situations, it will be useful to 'test' his acceptance level first and disclose it gradually. My advice is not let the secret out when you are too emotionally charged or unstable. Friends or family tend to be able to take it better if you are prepared with answers and emotionally stable, versus you let it out in an angry or confused state. Most misinformed laymen will think you are mentally unsound because you are addicted to gay men lifestyle or confused, even though they meant well as friends.

At the same time, we also need to expect friends or family do not understand you easily, given the fact you have always portrayed yourself as a straight married man. If you have taken so long to come to terms with your sexuality, even when you are living with it day and night, you should also expect people to take equally long too. Generally, people have fixed ideas what it meant as a gay man, straight man, single and married. Few can comprehend how gay and married straight life can co-exist.

Lastly, be clear with your motivation with your disclosure to your best friend. Disclosing to him because you want to share the truth with him is different from disclosing to him because you want him to be your best friend cum pseudo lover. If you make this part clear to him, it is less likely for him to reject you as a friend. You are also less likely to fall into self blaming if you are confident of your motivation.

If you need to talk more, call us on our anonymous hotline 6226 2002 (Tue to Thu 7 to 10pm or Sat 2 to 6pm) or email us on www.oogachaga.com/care.

cheers...Bryan

Edited September 5, 2011 by briax

[DonkeyKong]

Is there any married men who are straight here?

[GachiMuchi]

This post is strictly for discussion only.

Anyone who wants to look for friends, please PM them directly or go to the Personal folder.

Those Married not looking for sex - goes here - http://www.blowingwi...showtopic=25864

Those Married looking for sex - goes here. http://www.blowingwi...showtopic=22927

Any more guys who tries to post their ads here will be removed.

[btm_dude]

if you can bury your consciences, you can do. i know many could do it. if not how to ignore the urge? some bi also cruise in front of their wives. only their wives doesn't know it.

Ignoring the urge is a total failure.. or rather i dun really know how to do it.

Burying my consciences i dunno how to do it..

[Guest tan hock gin]

I really have to thank this forum for giving us the opportunity to air our happiness, horniness, frustrations and grievances. Where else can you do that? I empathize with the threader with his situation and hope that he finds a solution. I really wonder if there is a solution.

Being married for 15 years with kids is not an easy task in today's world. Let alone, a closet bisexual. For my case, in wasn't "born gay". I was as str8 as a flag pole and actually despise gays. I use to call you people aqua and faggots.

However, in the last 15 years, my perception has somewhat changed. I discovered my inner self (or some can call it my inner lust; I really dunno). When the wife decided that sex would be the last thing on her mind, I had to naturally find sex elsewhere. Any attempt to spice up the married life would only be shot down with excuses or the word, No.

I stumbled on homosexuality by accident when I was massaged by a guy and sexually aroused. This ended with a happy ending that I never expect I could get from another man. As time goes on, one gets only more curious and want to explore.

At lunch time today, I just ended a session with a masseur where I would crossdress in my wife's bra and used gstring and the masseur would ravage me even before the massage begins. My dual personality comes alive and I am transformed mentally and become the masseur's slut mistress. He would pound me mercilessly and do anything unthinkable and I would obediently submit like a submissive jap gal.

And after a fulfilling hour's massage, I feel that I have come back to my senses and life goes on again.

Would I tell my wife about this? Heck no. What good would it bring? Only misery for all.

Forgive me about my ranting but sometimes, leading a dual personality life is not by choice but circumstances.

For this, I thank the forum for showing me that I am not alone.

I dunno what good can come from this.

[Guest lame]

Are sure you are a tutor, and you expect us all to believe in your story? I don't think so. Because, from your posting, your English standard is pretty bad.

he only say tutor never say tutor what also!!

[Guest tt]

...At lunch time today, I just ended a session with a masseur where I would crossdress in my wife's bra and used gstring and the masseur would ravage me even before the massage begins....Would I tell my wife about this? Heck no....

But hor, when your wife keep finding her bra missing and sure your maid at home will become the scapegoat and sure kana hum-tan telok telok ... 黑猫偷吃白猫挡灾. so sad

[Guest tan hock gin]

Lol, Good one.

Too many in the drawer.

[struggling_married_man]

Today, my best friend asked and I admitted that I'm a gay. But I told him that I'm not involved and I don't have any sexual thoughts towards him. Then he asked me not to look for him or talk to him anymore. I just pretended that I'm ok but actually I was very hurt for what he said. He just walked away.

[GachiMuchi]

Just tell him that you want to be honest with him and if the price of your honesty is the cost of your friendship with him, then you have no regrets because you feel that your friendship with him should not be that of deceit but of honesty.

But that said, it is also his choice not to be involved with a gay man. So you will have to respect it and move on.

In life, we all wants good things to happen to us and we all want those we like to be with us forever, but the reality of life is that we never always gets what we want.

My advice for u is to grief a little, go drink and then move on. There are lots more interesting people out there to meet and know. Life goes on.

[Guest Ironrod]

Today, my best friend asked and I admitted that I'm a gay. But I told him that I'm not involved and I don't have any sexual thoughts towards him. Then he asked me not to look for him or talk to him anymore. I just pretended that I'm ok but actually I was very hurt for what he said. He just walked away.

I think you have gone too far to turn back.

I wrote something harsh but decided to not say it.

Just try walking in your wife's shoe - imagine somebody whom u trust one day tells you it's all a lie.

[slut]

Today, my best friend asked and I admitted that I'm a gay. But I told him that I'm not involved and I don't have any sexual thoughts towards him. Then he asked me not to look for him or talk to him anymore. I just pretended that I'm ok but actually I was very hurt for what he said. He just walked away.

wtf what a fxxking asswipe. i mean sorry to say but that 'friend' of yours is a complete moron.

[mamamia]

Today, my best friend asked and I admitted that I'm a gay. But I told him that I'm not involved and I don't have any sexual thoughts towards him. Then he asked me not to look for him or talk to him anymore. I just pretended that I'm ok but actually I was very hurt for what he said. He just walked away.

Would your best friend tell his wife , who may in turn tell your wife ? Most women could not keep secrets for what I know ....

[koolkai]

Today, my best friend asked and I admitted that I'm a gay. But I told him that I'm not involved and I don't have any sexual thoughts towards him. Then he asked me not to look for him or talk to him anymore. I just pretended that I'm ok but actually I was very hurt for what he said. He just walked away.

Actually, what is the reason you want to reveal to your best friend that you are gay and you are not involved in any gay activities or harbour any sexual thoughts towards him? It seems from what I gather (in my opinion) that you do hope to have more than just an ordinary friend-to-friend relationship with him or else you wont say that to him and hence you decided to take the chance.

[snowball]

is hard to let go someone you " like " & treasure, but what more important of life is, learnt to accept what beyond your control.

all the best

[Guest Guest]

u called that ur BEST friend? after all these years, he just said 'dun come and look for me again'...freaking lame and moron who knocks off a friendship cos he is gay.

[struggling_married_man]

We didn't talk since the other day. Today he came up to me and ask whether I'm a gay. So I admitted.

I deceived to lose a friend. I should not have gone deep into it emotionally. As straight is very different from gay emotionally.

[GachiMuchi]

Merged a similar dilemma of another married men who posted in 2007.

[struggling_married_man]

Actually, what is the reason you want to reveal to your best friend that you are gay and you are not involved in any gay activities or harbour any sexual thoughts towards him? It seems from what I gather (in my opinion) that you do hope to have more than just an ordinary friend-to-friend relationship with him or else you wont say that to him and hence you decided to take the chance.

I plainly and sincerely just wish to keep this friendship only and perhaps to be best friends only.

[Guest shenderz]

How is everyone here? I believe there are many people here who are sympathetic towards married men. Dun lose heart.

[btm_dude]

seems like no1 can have the best of both worlds... Having a happy family and sexual satisfaction in the gay world..

[philipf65]

Philipf65@hitmail.com ...I am married and lonely for a hug by another married bi

[GachiMuchi]

Philipf65@hitmail.com ...I am married and lonely for a hug by another married bi

Philipf65, you had been warned and suspended before for posting personal ad on the Main forum. And here you are doing this again.

This time round you will be suspended for 2 week.

This will be your last warning, the next time round you will be banned.

[Guest shenderz]

What did he do?

[Guest shenderz]

I remember when I first enter this circle, I met a married guy who was 1 yr older. However we only had a chat and never kept in touch ever since. Now I often wonder what could hv been.

And I know why I like married men. It's some kind of unattainable thing, juz like my father who was distant or my uncle who made me suck him and stopped suddenly.

Everyone has a vacuum in his soul.

As Kierkegaard said, do it or do not do it, you will regret both.