booms Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Whr do gay come from. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Slide Under The Table A man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned. The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared. After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table." The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "Ohh no, My husband just walked in the door." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Affair A young associate was romantically ambushed in a darkened room of the law firm. After months of the social isolation that comes from eighty hour work weeks, the associate was happy to reciprocate. However, when asked by a friend to identify the lover, the associate was puzzled. "All I know for sure is that it was a partner -- I had to do all the work." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Young dentist A young Dentist had just started his own Clinic. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the front office. Wishing to appear the "busy dentist", the gentleman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had to give an appointment. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?" The man said, "Yeah, I've come to activate the phone" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Magician Jake: What does your father do for a living? Matt: He’s a magician. He performs tricks, like sawing people in half. Jake: Do you have any brothers or sisters? Matt: Yep, four half-sisters and a half-brother. Seedrick 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Bugs "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" asked the boy. "Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son," his father replied. After dinner the father inquired, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy said. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Mother to daughter advice Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day. But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend. Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. The only reason your husband likes to go fishing so much is that it's the only time he hears someone tell him, "Wow, that's a big one!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Don’t disturb A person checks into a hotel for the first time in his life, and goes up to his room. Five minutes later he calls the desk and say, "You've given me a room with no exit. How do I leave?" The desk clerk says, "Sir, that's absurd. Have you looked for the door?" The person says, " Well, there's one door that leads to the bathroom. There's a second door that goes into the closet. And there's a door I haven't tried, but it has a 'do not disturb' sign on it." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: True Love A man and his newlywed check into a mountain resort by a lake. The desk clerk notices the "Just Married" sign still on the car. As soon as the man gets the luggage out of the car, he hops in a boat to go fishing. He is out all day, comes back for a quick supper, picks up his lantern and goes back out at night. This goes on for a couple of days when the man happens to stop by the desk. The clerk starts a conversation with the man and mentions his behavior. "I know it's none of my business, but I was wondering why you weren't having sex with your new wife." "Oh, I couldn't do that; she has gonorrhea." "Well, what about anal sex?" "Couldn't do that; she has diarrhea." "There is always oral sex." "Nope, she has pyorrhea." "Wait a second. If she has gonorrhea, diarrhea, and pyorrhea, why did you marry her?" "That's easy. She also has worms, and I love to fish!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Blonde, redhead & brunette 1 A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Blonde, redhead & brunette 2 There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette. They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away. The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died. The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died. The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Blonde, redhead & brunette 3 A blonde and brunette are living together. The brunette came home from work one day and the blonde had a rope around her waist. The brunette asked why she had a rope tied around her waist. The blonde answered that she was trying to commit suicide. The brunette said, "You're supposed to put the rope around your neck." The blonde replied, "I tried that but I couldn't breathe!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Little Sally Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face, and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his weenie today at the playground!" Before the mother could raise a concern, Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Sally replied, "No, salty." Mom fainted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Sarah Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Cheese & Tomato A boy says to a girl, "So, sex at my place?" "Yeah!" "Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother, and he thinks we're making sandwiches, so we have to have a code. Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay?" Later on the girl is yelling, "Cheese cheese, tomato tomato!" The younger brother says, "Stop making sandwiches! You're getting mayo all over my bed!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Maths Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"Johnny: "Seven."Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"Johnny: "Seven."Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"Johnny: "Seven!"Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: Self-esteem A teacher wanted to teach her students about self-esteem, so she asked anyone who thought they were stupid to stand up. One kid stood up and the teacher was surprised. She didn’t think anyone would stand up so she asked him, “Why did you stand up?” He answered, “I didn’t want to leave you standing up by yourself.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Joke: An overweight guy There is an overweight guy who is watching TV. A commercial comes on for a guaranteed weight loss of 10 pounds in a week. So the guy, thinking what the hell, signs up for it. Next morning an incredibly beautiful woman is standing at his door in nothing but a pair of running shoes and a sign about her neck that reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me." As soon as he sees her, she takes off running. He tries to catch her, but is unable. This continues for a week, at the end of which, the man has lost 10 pounds. After this he tries the next weight loss plan, 15 pounds in a week. The next morning an even more beautiful woman is standing at the door, in similar conditions. The same happens with her as the first woman, except he almost catches her. This continues for a week, at the end of which he, as suspected, weighs 15 pounds less. Excited about this success, he decides to do the master program. Before he signs up, he is required to sign a waiver and is warned about the intensity of this plan. Still he signs up. The next morning, waiting at the door, is a hulking 300 pound muscle man with nothing but a pair of running shoes, a raging erection, and a sign around his neck that says, "If I catch you, you're mine!" The man was supposed to lose 25 pounds in the week; he lost 34. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: The dwarf A man lives and works in the same building. Every day he takes the elevator from the 10th floor down to the 1st floor where he works. At the end of the day he rides from the 1st floor up to the 7th floor and takes the stairs the rest of the way. Why? He is a dwarf and can't reach the 10th floor button. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Old Man An old man goes to the doctor for some tests. When he gets the results, the doctor tells him that he has bad news. The old man says, "Just give it to me straight, doc." The doctor says, "Well, you have cancer, and you have Alzheimer's." The old man says, "I guess it could be worse. I could have cancer." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Earth science The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading. After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes, the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, four minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude?" After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Windy day On a windy day, an old lady is standing on a street corner, holding on to her hat with both hands, even though her dress is flying up over her face. An old man across the street sees her and runs over. As he approaches her, he says, "Sister, you ought to be ashamed of yourself, standing over here in all this wind with your dress flying over your head, exposing your paraphernalia, and you're holding that damn hat with both hands. You ought to be ashamed." She looked at him and said, "Look here, fool, everything down there is 80 years old, but this hat is brand new." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Two men Two men walk beside each other down the street, one of them sees a broken piece of mirror on the ground, grabs it, looks at it and says, "This guy looks so familiar, but I can't remember where I know him from." The other guy grabs it from his hand, takes a look at it, and says, "It's me you idiot!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: 13 - 14 How I learned to mind my own business. I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, "13! 13! 13!" The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the planks, so I looked through to see what was going on. Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick! Then they all started shouting, "14! 14! 14!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: The cowboy A cowboy goes down to the stable, lifts his horse's tail, and plants a kiss smack dab on the horses butthole. Another cowboy sees this and yells, "What the hell are you doing?" He replies, "I've got chapped lips." The other cowboy asks, "Does that help?" "Nope," he answers, "It just keeps me from licking them." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Skydiving A man goes skydiving. After a fantastic free fall, he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open. Just then another man flies by him, going up. The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?" The man replies, "No, you know anything about dynamite?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: An elderly couple There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top." So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke:Sex Toys In a sex toys store a guy asks for an inflatable doll. The seller:- Would you like a regular one, or the one with artificial intellect?- With artificial intellect, please.The next day the same guy returns and asks:- Please change it to a regular one…- Why?- She didn't give it to me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Gynaecologist or Barbershop A girl comes to a gynaecologist. She undresses and sits down with legs wide apart. Doctor:- Up!The girl lift her legs up.- Up!The girl lifts her legs even higher.- Up!!! – shouts doc.Girl: - Doc, I can’t lift them higher.Doc: - The office of gynaecologist is up on the Second Floor. It‘s the barber shop here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke:StressYou stop and pick up a nice hitchhiking girl. Suddenly she loses consciousness and you take her to a hospital. This is stress. In the hospital you are being told that she is pregnant and doctors start congratulating you with the future newborn. You explain that just an hour ago you have seen her for the first time in your life, but she starts telling that you are the father. This is a big stress already. You require for a DNR analysis and they make it. Then the doctors tell you silently, that actually you can't be a father since you are genetically sterile. This is a stress, combined with a relief. On your way back home you remember, that you have three kids. That's what the real stress is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Take me Husband and his wife lying in a bed. Wife flings her one leg on husband shoulder and whispers:- Take me!Men do not pay attention to that. The wife flings on her second leg.- Take me!Men: - I'm not going anywhere! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke:Problem Husband: Honey, I have problems at work.Wife: Not "I", but "we" have problems - since we are married, your problems are mine problems as well.Husband: ok. Then I wanted to let you know that our office-girl got pregnant from us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke: Volfgang An officer asks a lady, who came with a request for a financial support:- What are the names of your six kids?- Volfgang, Volfgang, Volfgang, Volfgang, Volfgang and Volfgang.- But how do you call them for dinner? - Simply, I call only once – Volfgang!- But what if you want to call only one of them?- I call them by their last names. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clementi Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Joke:Casino A guy went to a casino and lost all 10 000$. Swearing for the situation he goes to a taxi driver and asks:- I have lost all my money, please give me a ride back home for free.- F**k off, no money, no ride.The next day the guys come to casino again and this time he successfully won all the money back and 10 000$ extra. Hi goes out of the casino happily and sees five taxis, and the last car is the one, which refused to give a ride for free yesterday.He goes to the first taxi and says:- Will you take me home for 100$?- Sure!- But when you take me there you'll have to do the blow-job as well- F**k off, man..The guys goes to all next three cars and the story repeats. Finally he goes to the last taxi driver, who refused to help a day ago, and says:- Will you take me home for 100$?- Sure!- Deal, but you have to pass through those other four taxi drivers very, very slowly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Joke: Drunken It is 2:00 am. There are a half dozen empty vodka bottles lying on the dimly-lit street. Two men standing in the middle of street have been arguing that the other man is more drunk. Finally, one man said to the other, “If you are not drunk, then climb up this column," pointing to the vertical beam of light that the flashlight in this right hand makes. Thinking a bit, the other man stuttered, “I am not that stupid. If I climb up to the top and you turn off the light, I will surely fall to my death!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Joke: Plumbing problem On a public holiday, a doctor has some trouble with his kitchen sink. He calls the local plumber, only to be told that it's his day off. "But I get called out on my days off too!" says the doctor, somewhat exasperated. So the plumber relents. The plumber arrives, and glances over the sink, looking preoccupied. He mumbles something about golf, then hands the doctor a couple of aspirin and walks out, saying, "Put these in. If it doesn't clear up in 24 hours, call me tomorrow." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 18, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Joke: Seeing doctor A guy goes to see his doctor, and the doctor says, "Well, I'm afraid you have six weeks to live." The guy says, "Oh damn, well what should I do doctor?" The doctor tells him, "You should take a mud bath once a day for the next six weeks," and the guy asks, "Why? Is that supposed to help?" and the doctor says, "No, but it'll get you used to being in the ground." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke:At the Dentist Monica is at the dentist. Half of her mouth is locked due to anaesthesia, the dentist is intensively working. Monica's mobile phone starts ringing. Ignoring it four times, the dentist finally answers the phone pissed:- What’s up?- What’s up?, - some man asks.Dentist:- Who are you?- I’m Monica’s husbandDentist:- Listen, man, I’m about to finish, she will spit it out and will call you back!!! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: Sex A guy and his girlfriend have been dating for three years. With no sex. They decided to marry. Two week before the wedding a guy leads his girlfriend to her home. They go into the stairwell of her apartment building. The guy:- Darling, please, let's have sex, right here in the stairwell, I can't wait any longer. Only two weeks are left to the wedding, this won't change anything. Please, I want it so much.- Sorry, no, and I have three reasons: 1. If you have managed to wait for three years, you'll easily deal with two more weeks.2. If anyone would see us making love in the stairwell, this would ruin everything. 3. I still feel terrible backache after sex in the stairwell. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: FlowersA new husband arrived home with a big bouquet of flowers. His wife met him at the door, saw the flowers and dropped on the floor, spreading her legs in front of him."This is for the flowers," she said."Don't be silly," he said. "I'am sure we have a vase somewhere at home". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke:PlayingA guy lies on bed, reads a book. His girlfriend comes from behind and starts clapping on his ass. Guy:- What are you doing?- Playing percussion.- Would you like to play the flute? Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke:Three daughters The mother had three virgin daughters. All three got married almost at the same time and went on a honeymoon. The mother was very worried about the beginning of their sexual life, and asked them to send her at least a few words how it's going. The first one sent a postcard from Hawaii, just after two days after the wedding. On top of it there was just one word: "Nescafe". Her mother ran into the kitchen, find a coffee "Nescafe" and read on the label: "Blessing" until the last drop". Mother blushed, but was satisfied with her daughter's happiness. The second daughter sent the postcard from Jamaica a few days later, where she read "Benson n Hedges" cigars. She immediately went to the man's room, where she found his "Benson Hedges" and read "Extra Long cigars. King Size". She again shyly blushed, but was happy for her daughter.The third daughter went off for the honeymoon to Caribbean. Mother was waiting for the week – nothing. Week later - nothing again. Only a month later finally got a postcard, where with the trembling hand was written "British Airways". Mother quickly found a journal and began to look for what she was afraid about, and then she found British Airways advertisement and read: "Three times a day, seven days a week, in both ends!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: The ChoiceDuring a blind date, as a man and a woman were filling each other in on their pasts, the man said, "A genie once gave me the option of having a longer penis or better memory"."And which did you choose?" the woman asked.A man replied "I don't remember". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke:Marriage A couple is celebrating their 30 years anniversary of marriage. The husband asks his wife:- We have grown 12 kids. But Johnny is different from the rest. Please, tell me honestly, I will forgive you, but I wanna know – maybe you have cheated on me?The wife replies:- Yes, I was. Johnny is your real son... Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: Remarry A husband asks his wife:- If I die, will you remarry?- Of course no, darling, I will stay with my sister. And if I die, will you remarry?- No, I will also stay with your sister. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: No sex A doctor was advising a couple after he performed minor surgery on the wife. "It will take you seven days to heal, so no sex for a week.""Did you hear that?" the wife asked her husband."Yes," he said. "But he was talking to you. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: Retirees A group of retirees are on a bus trip when an old lady comes up to the driver and complains about being molested. The driver wonders who would want to molest her, and so tells her to go back and sit down. Later, another old woman approaches and complains about molestation, and the driver tells her to go back and sit. A third old lady screams and so this time the driver goes to investigate. He finds an old man on his hands and knees, and so he asks him what he's doing. The old man says, "I'm trying to grab my toupee. Each time I grab it, it jumps and runs away screaming." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: New family driver Martin had just received his brand new driver’s license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver."I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father."Nope," comes dad's reply, "I'm gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me all these years." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: Out of food supplies With four daughters and one son always dashing to school activities and part-time jobs, our schedule was hectic.To add to this, we kept running out of household supplies.I instructed them all to let me know when they used the last of any item by writing it down on a note pad on the refrigerator.As a reminder, I wrote at the top: "IF WE ARE OUT OF IT, WRITE IT DOWN."When I checked the pad a few days later, to my delight I found the following message:"MOM, YOU MAY BE A BIT OLD-FASHIONED, BUT YOU ARE NOT 'OUT OF IT."' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted October 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Joke: Newest son-in-law A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. "I love my daughter, and now I welcome you into the family," said the man. "To show you how much we care for you, I'm making you a 50-50 partner in my business. All you have to do is go to the factory every day and learn the operations."The son-in-law interrupted, "I hate factories. I can't stand the noise.""I see," replied the father-in-law. "Well, then you'll work in the office and take charge of some of the operations.""I hate office work," said the son-on-law. "I can't stand being stuck behind a desk all day.""Wait a minute," said the father-in-law. "I just make you half-owner of a moneymaking organization, but you don't like factories and won't work in a office. What am I going to do with you?""Easy," said the young man. "Buy me out." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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