Popular Post kingbitch Posted May 24, 2017 Popular Post Report Share Posted May 24, 2017 Love this thread. I've always thought BW is full of trolls and idiots who respond to trolls, but here we see there are actual posters in BW with brains and personality. My answers are generally similar to the median response here - and based on a quick scan I think the majority of the answers are fairly similar to one another. I agree that the thirties give us a sense of peace and security. Many of us are quite settled/decided with our i) sense of self, ii) finances, and iii) career, so the next thing we want to do is to grow in these aspects. Love is rather difficult to control, but I'm sure our outlook to love and relationships is more mature and sensible than a decade before. We tend to eschew a big group of acquaintances and focus more on our family and our close friends, ie. the people who matter more. The one thing I don't like about my fellow 30s friends, at least amongst my own friends, is how ridiculously social-media dependent they still are with their selfies and wefies all day. On the other hand, since entering my 30s I've also developed traits which I know are unpopular with many other people - I am very ready to sever relationships quickly (friends, dates, employers, staff, colleagues, customers/suppliers at work, telco providers, kopi, retailers...) if I do not see long term value in tolerating their nonsense - I no longer think discrimination is bad - I no longer think helping is an obligation - I no longer have patience for boring and unintelligent people unless I like them already - I no longer think that religion is not dumb (meaning I am ready to admit that it is) Creevie, Pubic01, ahben94 and 6 others 8 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ctglobal Posted May 24, 2017 Report Share Posted May 24, 2017 27 minutes ago, kingbitch said: On the other hand, since entering my 30s I've also developed traits which I know are unpopular with many other people - I am very ready to sever relationships quickly (friends, dates, employers, staff, colleagues, customers/suppliers at work, telco providers, kopi, retailers...) if I do not see long term value in tolerating their nonsense - I no longer think discrimination is bad - I no longer think helping is an obligation - I no longer have patience for boring and unintelligent people unless I like them already - I no longer think that religion is not dumb (meaning I am ready to admit that it is) OMG LOVES IIIIIIITTTTTT Yes please more people post like this. Wonderful to break the banality of this site! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creevie Posted May 26, 2017 Author Report Share Posted May 26, 2017 On 24/05/2017 at 4:06 PM, kingbitch said: The one thing I don't like about my fellow 30s friends, at least amongst my own friends, is how ridiculously social-media dependent they still are with their selfies and wefies all day. On the other hand, since entering my 30s I've also developed traits which I know are unpopular with many other people - I am very ready to sever relationships quickly (friends, dates, employers, staff, colleagues, customers/suppliers at work, telco providers, kopi, retailers...) if I do not see long term value in tolerating their nonsense - I no longer think discrimination is bad - I no longer think helping is an obligation - I no longer have patience for boring and unintelligent people unless I like them already - I no longer think that religion is not dumb (meaning I am ready to admit that it is) Wonderful to see someone with similar views! Thanks to everyone for their responses!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted June 3, 2017 Report Share Posted June 3, 2017 I'm 35 this year, and happy about it! Careers : Simple career with good colleagues. We instagram and take wefies almost every other day! Health : Jog and gym with friends! Wefies to show to our friends what we are doing! Financial : Some money to go along! Often posting selfies of myself enjoying a good treat once in a while! Saving : Some savings here and there thanks to a good financial planner. We gym together with frequent selfies. Relationship : Fuckbuddy? Sometimes finding fuckbuddies via my network, or attending private orgy parties Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Watttt Posted June 3, 2017 Report Share Posted June 3, 2017 42 minutes ago, Guest Guest said: I'm 35 this year, and happy about it! Careers : Simple career with good colleagues. We instagram and take wefies almost every other day! Health : Jog and gym with friends! Wefies to show to our friends what we are doing! Financial : Some money to go along! Often posting selfies of myself enjoying a good treat once in a while! Saving : Some savings here and there thanks to a good financial planner. We gym together with frequent selfies. Relationship : Fuckbuddy? Sometimes finding fuckbuddies via my network, or attending private orgy parties Why do most things involve taking pictures/selfies/wefies and posting on Instagram lol. Me thinks it's all a mask leh at the end of the day. Deep seeded sadness maybe. Everything also show the world lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blogger Adam Posted June 3, 2017 Report Share Posted June 3, 2017 I'm in my late 30s - and I have two fellow 1979-ers whom I've know since we were 17 years old. One of them is a high flying staff at an MNC. The other - equally high flying - works in a ministry. They have money, they assets. I, on the other hand, have a healthy amount of contentment though I find myself living life vicariously through one of them - my carefree sex bunny friend, Stanley. And this is when I sell my blog because I chronicle our weekly gatherings - and weave their interesting lives into stories with my words. Stories which explore issues people our age might go through. http://adamandtheboys2.blogspot.sg/ Quote http://adamandtheboys2.blogspot.sg/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest black dog Posted January 12, 2018 Report Share Posted January 12, 2018 Wow everyone is doing so well? No failures or sad cases? I can’t read this thread and not feel suicidal. I’m also in my thirties but unlike all of you I have almost nothing except regrets and a small amount of debt. My twenties were totally wasted. No financial security, no future prospects, no youth, and stuck in a sterile relationship. When a coworker asked me what my dreams were and I couldn’t answer, that’s when I realized that at some point I’d just given up on them. The only difference between my life and a car crash wreckage is that there are no winning 4D numbers to be found in my life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BT90 Posted January 13, 2018 Report Share Posted January 13, 2018 There's a good chance that straight people in their 30s lead similar lives with people who aren't straight. What i'm saying is, are we really that different? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qsefthu78 Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 Now closing in to 40, I do not need to know how others live or compare myself to others to live a life I want. Quote https://linktr.ee/johntanegbdf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Listen Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 On 1/13/2018 at 12:22 AM, Guest black dog said: Wow everyone is doing so well? No failures or sad cases? I can’t read this thread and not feel suicidal. I’m also in my thirties but unlike all of you I have almost nothing except regrets and a small amount of debt. My twenties were totally wasted. No financial security, no future prospects, no youth, and stuck in a sterile relationship. When a coworker asked me what my dreams were and I couldn’t answer, that’s when I realized that at some point I’d just given up on them. The only difference between my life and a car crash wreckage is that there are no winning 4D numbers to be found in my life. You sound normal than many people and soon those people will keep up with you. Don't worry too much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Boringlife Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 What do u all do usually during free time especially on weekends? i don’t have many friends, they have families already, I can’t keep disturbing them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justanotherme Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 In my early thirties. Career: Stable job. Tiring but sense of satisfaction is there. Health : Feel tired easily as compared to years ago. Sleeping less too. Work out few times a week to keep myself in shape. Financial : Own a car, planning for a house in a couple of years. Saving : Just finished paying the car and starting to save up for house. So not much of savings per say. Relationship : Single for at least 6 years. Intend to stay this way. Weekend is spent repaying sleep debt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HotIce Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 Am in my late 30s. Peace of mind / self-esteem: Generally contented but have self esteem issues sometimes as I do compare with others who are better off than me unwittingly. Am working on this. Finances (income/savings/investments etc): Healthy with 6 figure savings and investments. Income is pretty decent but can always be better. Work: Kinda fell under expectations. Thought I will be at a higher level than where I am at currently. However, I'm a person who values a lot of work life balance so have to give and take in this area. Love: Am in a relationship but after a few years, we have become more like companions than lovers. Taking it one day at a time. Friends and family: Solid family support. Friends wise have some straight friends whom we stay hang out with. Not much gay friends though. Health and fitness: Gym consistently but hit a plateau. Really more like maintaining what I have nowadays. Trying to stay healthy but have no discipline and eating crap foods if they are available. Media habits: Am not a cam whore and only use Facebook. Post only regarding my trips and nothing else. Cannot stand those people who goes on trips and post 6-8 times a day of their selfies. Likes watching movies and also game when I have the time. Lifestyle thoughts, fulfilment level, outlook: Am a learner interested in many things, trying to learn this and that but never into much depth - jack of many but master of none. Am trying to change this by going deeper into things. Going to improve my half baked Japanese, really do some actual baking and improving my coding skills for some IoT personal projects, this year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Loss Posted January 14, 2018 Report Share Posted January 14, 2018 I’m 35 this year -peace of mind / self-esteem Aimless about future. Constantly thinking I’ll be left alone in the future. - finances (income/savings/investments etc) have $200k savings. Dunno much about investment, only play abit of stocks salary above $6k, only eligible for resale flats which are very expensive - work work life balance. Salary quite acceptable. dun foresee career progression in near future - love being single for my whole life. I’m not good looking. Go sauna also rejected many times. - friends and family Only 2 straight best friends - health and fitness pick up gym to shed my extra weight feeling tired easily too penis not as hard as before and don’t get to erect easily. - media habits watch movies, Hk drama, the variety shows - lifestyle thoughts, fulfilment level, outlook life repeats everyday feeling gloomy and down everyday Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7heaven Posted January 15, 2018 Report Share Posted January 15, 2018 On 14/01/2018 at 3:22 AM, BT90 said: There's a good chance that straight people in their 30s lead similar lives with people who aren't straight. What i'm saying is, are we really that different? More true if these straight guys r unmarried. If they r married n or married with kids, their lives would be quite different. E.g., weekly visits to parents’ place, bringing kids out to play etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Creevie Posted August 19, 2018 Author Report Share Posted August 19, 2018 Lovely to revisit this thread again Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cycle25 Posted August 19, 2018 Report Share Posted August 19, 2018 Turning 30 soon so I guess I qualify? Career - This year I quit my full-time job. Went back to work part-time and am doing a WSQ course in baking now. Looking to switch industries and hopefully find joy in what I do. Relationship - Gonna hit the 5 year mark and looking forward to a long list of milestones. Hopefully in the long term marriage and children. Home - We've been living together for 2 years now and are renting a place. The independence is nice. Finances - Due to me leaving full-time employment, this has taken a hit for sure. Lots of bills, existing investment contracts that need to be paid for. But I'm trying. Really trying. Health - I guess am a bit more conscious about exercising and the whole concept of my body is aging so I need to take care of it. Definitely don't feel as energetic as compared to a decade ago. But improving with weekly swimming for exercise. Friendships - This is a very fluid point for me... Groups that I was close with a decade ago have become distant and I don't feel invested in. They've been replaced by newer groups of friends that I've probably interacted with more over the last few years. Family - Again, a fluid area of my life as we have our ups and downs. My nuclear family is still sweeping my relationship under the carpet while my maternal extended family is supportive and paternal extended family knows nothing about it. For approaching my 30's I think I'm doing alright. I hope I am! slipnslide, Creevie, bluefish20008 and 1 other 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pubic01 Posted August 19, 2018 Report Share Posted August 19, 2018 Not as bad as I thought. There’re of course good memories, not so good ones, and painful ones. Perhaps more challenges and lessons await. Likely. But we learn. If I’m to summarise, I think thirties is all about learning from set backs and how to get right back up, continue walking, and adjust our strides and what we focus on in our walks. No short cuts in life’s journey. Forties shouldn’t be too bad i believe if we keep our health, livelihood and pay checks stable and balanced. Heath first and by that I mean both physical and mental health. Take care of yourself and you can care for those dear to you. Being cautious of people (even close ones, friends, colleagues, etc.) doesn’t hurt. Finally, parents hold dear to me especially so when we age. Their aging seem to accelerate too. Wish that they can be young always but time waits for no one. Likely my forties will be spent focusing on my parents and it’s a duty I’m geared to take on. Romance has been on the waiting list for the longest time and has evaded me several times. My guess is that, in our society, people like us grew up rather bruised and way finding is a perpetual process especially when society has no institutionalised structure for plu. Relationship models just can’t find anchorage. Romance may actually be just a fairytale, increasingly so it seems to me; Imagining that a future one awaits doesn’t hurt though Creevie 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kingbitch Posted August 19, 2018 Report Share Posted August 19, 2018 Yesterday we had three 30s guys hanging out with a 50s friend and a 60s friend. In the grand scheme of things I was reminded we 30s guys are still young enough for bright-eyed optimism, yet older enough for society to take more seriously. I think one big reason is we are more aware of what we don't know. There is still a lot of room for improvement. I still find myself apathetic to the marginalized the unprivileged and the environment. I still form judgements over certain individuals. I don't really express these views except to my family, besties and boyfriend - all of whom agree/disagree to various extents but still accept me for who I am. Without the institution of marriage and the natural progression to fatherhood, we gays probably have to fight harder to discover what more we want from life. Deeper connection with our God? Get super rich? Get super buff and attractive? Champion various causes? I'm meeting a gay 40s friend in the Philippines this week who is raising two kids he fathered through IVF and I hope that would be an eye opener for me. will7z, Creevie and Pubic01 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sirfalas Posted August 20, 2018 Report Share Posted August 20, 2018 Lovely thread guys I gave up on BW a while back but made a new acct just for this thread. Let's see I'm 34 this year tbh I still feel like I'm in my 20s which I know is not always a good thing. i'm just as confused as I was in so many things. Career - starting to pick up stable good income have enough to get my hdb next year. But tbh it's not really what I want to do in life so i'm constantly trying to find opportunities to really do something i'm passionate about. Health - So far so good, trying to keep myself healthy in the long term lots of stretching and so on. Also starting to really care about my diet, less sugar, organic etc. (family has history of cancer). Relationship - Ah the big question...I've always been bi but slightly more attracted to guys maybe 60/40. And i'm still in a rut. Recently got to know a really nice gal, sweet, understanding, smart. I can see our future together...but I also have guy buddy we've known each other for 2 years now and still every time I think of him my heart beats a bit faster and it puts a smile on my lips and I want more but never took that step. Family - Related to the above...I've always loved children and especially now. I see the way my sister looks at her children; her fierce love and unflailing dedication to them. i'm in awe of the clarity of her purpose and how much stronger she's become now that she's a mother and my hearts hurts a little knowing that I might never experience that. Friends - Friends come and they go and now as someone said earlier many are married.. things have changed for them so I let them be. I have a large extended family that takes the place of my friends and i'm thankful for that. So I come back full circle again wondering about the same things I did when I was 20 and dream. Creevie 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GuestNE Posted August 20, 2018 Report Share Posted August 20, 2018 Just turned 30! 1 - peace of mind / self-esteem Happy with myself. But always can improve and be a better person. 2 - finances (income/savings/investments etc) Monthly pay $7k but have commitment to support family. Have savings for rainy days. Just bought a condo w my partner. All good! 3 - work Managerial role. Boss and colleagues are nice. Slow and steady! 4 - love Been in rs for 6 years! Moving in together soon! 5 - friends and family Have close friends! Family is settled. Well there will always be ups and downs. 6 - health and fitness Can be better! 老了! 7 - media habits Less active but still posts in IG and FB! I am blessed and happy for what I have today! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
repressednerd Posted August 22, 2018 Report Share Posted August 22, 2018 My 30s are over, so I'll just contribute what I did during my 30s: Career - manage to progress and enjoyed quite a good spike in pay compared to my 30s that money is no longer a concern, given chances to work short term overseas stints Housing - moved out at 26 out of my parents' home as I took up a job overseas. Came back at 30 but realised I needed to be independent. Sounds like a waste of money, but I rented a house with a bunch of friends at 31 and stayed till 37 when I managed to get my own house. Maybe I could have got this at 35 if I didn't rent, but the years of living independently for 6 years were invaluable. Lifestyle - Gym and swims do not take up a huge part of my life, but every other day it's a commitment of perhaps 1.5 hours each. Perhaps that's why I haven't become buff. Enjoy Sunday evenings at the park along with buying groceries after that. Friends & Family - slowed down to a close circle of friends where we meet every year. Meet family every quarter (that's the healthiest equilibrium for me) Sexual needs - More or less manageable by masturbation. When feeling super horny, would go to the sauna. And this lifestyle continues to the big four. Creevie, cycle25, Vital signs and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Empress Posted August 22, 2018 Report Share Posted August 22, 2018 When gays in there 20s, fresh from school and NS. When in 30s, got extra $, go party, eat alot, grow fat, try to act young. When in their 40s, decided to go plastic surgery and gym to attract attention. Got the fierce look to fight for younger men. Like the brightest sunshine before sunset. in their 50s, give up, try to tone down, easy come easy go. in their 60s, the sunset years, no market values. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sum1outhere_03 Posted August 22, 2018 Report Share Posted August 22, 2018 On 4/26/2017 at 3:07 PM, Creevie said: Hi everyone! First off, I'm born 1984 chn. I wonder how the the lives are of those who're in their 30s. Some I see are still trying to live it wild and young like they're in their 20s, some are still instagramming so much that it's quite pathetic in their attention seeking. (EDIT: I'm being blasted for calling instagrammers pathetic but no, I apologise for that sweeping statement; I don't mean to be disrespectful. I just saw some instagays posting so frequently with captions that are obviously fishing for praises and likes in such a lame fashion that one day I had enough... I look at Insta-guys time to time la that's why) Or do you all have established careers, adequate savings and healthy investments? Saving towards your own bachelor pad, or already owning yours, or still living with your parents (nothing wrong too)? Or maybe still job hopping, or just changed industry with a more positive outlook? You all got good and deep friendships or romantic relationships? Or still sleeping around with the philosophy of playing around all your life etc? Do you all exercise enough, like more for overall fitness and functionality and not just looks and steamroom sex like in your twenties? Watching your health and fitness too? Are you all at peace with yourself and accepting any flaws that you are born with? I think I'm less judgmental than before lol. I used to be so mentally corrupted and haughty... Just wondering la, since I have some lulltime at work now. A ramble but I hope it's thoughtful enough to gather some responses too haha. Are u all happy with yourselves For example, - peace of mind / self-esteem - finances (income/savings/investments etc) - work - love - friends and family - health and fitness - media habits - lifestyle thoughts, fulfilment level, outlook - etc Thanks guys! *waves* I am the same age as you! Although would prefer if I have more friends of this circle or even a boyfriend with a good sex life, other than that, I guess life has been pretty good although work indeed has some level of stress to deal with. And although wanting the above to be realised, I find that I am free enough (in terms of time and personal space) to meet my straight friends (if they're available), able to have a consistent fixed time to exercise, chill and sometimes self-pleasuring (aka masturbating) without much distractions (even though I'm living with my parents). I have also been making self-awareness that there isn't that much need to emphasize to think of the future all the time because there could sometimes give yourself some form of stress on yourself. It's important to plan and save for future, but it's as important to live in the now as well, as long as what you're happy what you're doing now. Just my 2 cents. Quote Will you be my valentine's? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sum1outhere_03 Posted August 22, 2018 Report Share Posted August 22, 2018 Something out of point though, this pictures remind me of Princess Huanzhu (还珠格格) 7 hours ago, Guest Empress said: When gays in there 20s, fresh from school and NS. When in 30s, got extra $, go party, eat alot, grow fat, try to act young. When in their 40s, decided to go plastic surgery and gym to attract attention. Got the fierce look to fight for younger men. Like the brightest sunshine before sunset. in their 50s, give up, try to tone down, easy come easy go. in their 60s, the sunset years, no market values. Quote Will you be my valentine's? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 31, 2020 Report Share Posted May 31, 2020 For guys who are in 30s and take care of yourself, it's usually the beginning where you start to age well. Guys look the best at 40s if they take care of themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 1, 2020 Report Share Posted June 1, 2020 Can't say much about the age part but since I do work with social media I learn lots of stuffs. The superficiality is there, especially who we called influencers. The market has been saturated by them. They have their own cliques of Instagram friends (everyone on the bottom barrel of being influencers trying to ride on the game by being friends with the top), Everytime any of them posted something, their entire cliques will flock over to the comment section liking and praising the "aesthetic" (what aesthetic? I feel like this word has been butchered by them and the meaning is not there anymore). I don't actually mind people sharing their lives on social media, they are happy to share it with you even if it's sometimes superficial. If they share their fitness routine, or showing buns and abs or their love partner, it's not all bad things. Remember any platform in the internet works to provide you something you might like, you search gay porn on the internet, next thing you know Instagram will give you ads for Grindr because it thinks it's time for you to stop jerking off and start looking for a boyfriend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Peaceful Place Posted June 1, 2020 Report Share Posted June 1, 2020 I have peace. The only person I have is GOD, who promised me everything I need, if I pray in a quiet place Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phewphew Posted June 1, 2020 Report Share Posted June 1, 2020 5 hours ago, Guest Peaceful Place said: I have peace. The only person I have is GOD, who promised me everything I need, if I pray in a quiet place o.o this took a deep dive in anothe rdirection Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phewphew Posted June 1, 2020 Report Share Posted June 1, 2020 On 1/13/2018 at 12:22 AM, Guest black dog said: Wow everyone is doing so well? No failures or sad cases? I can’t read this thread and not feel suicidal. I’m also in my thirties but unlike all of you I have almost nothing except regrets and a small amount of debt. My twenties were totally wasted. No financial security, no future prospects, no youth, and stuck in a sterile relationship. When a coworker asked me what my dreams were and I couldn’t answer, that’s when I realized that at some point I’d just given up on them. The only difference between my life and a car crash wreckage is that there are no winning 4D numbers to be found in my life. If you ever do chance on this thread again, how are you doing? i hope you are doing well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zerosum Posted June 6, 2020 Report Share Posted June 6, 2020 Just turned 30...Thinking back. I can't really think of anything significant after graduation till now. I wish I had accomplished more? Nevertheless, still actively looking for friends as I was in my 20s. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahben94 Posted May 24, 2023 Report Share Posted May 24, 2023 tbh when i was in my 20s i didn't believe that my 30s would be better. like I was really scared of getting older. and i didn't get why everyone says that your 30s will be better... until i hit my late 20s. i'm 29 now, and i feel like i'm really coming into my own. only wished that I was wiser earlier, but i guess we all have to learn, and also let the hormones fade, hahahahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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