Are Online Personas More "Garang" Than In Real Life?

[sgmaven]

Just thought that I would start off this discussion after a few interactions with a few people, both online, and then in real person.

 

Quite often, the online personality is much more "larger than life" and "garang". They claim this and that. Then, when you meet in person, they are actually much like "shrinking violets", much more conservative. What do you guys think? Do you share the same kind of experiences? If so, why do you think this is so?

[Guest Boy]

I believe there are all sorts - some are, like you said, more "garang" online, but there are others who aren't. It boils down to their personality as well as self-esteem, which, IMHO, has infinite variability, although more generally, online platforms do allow people to hide certain aspects of their true personality/self-esteem.

 

A key factor other than personality and self-esteem would be that "text" is a form communication which is highly dependent on the proficiency of the language used, for all parties involved, whereas face-to-face interactions allow us to observe facial expressions, body language and tones (perhaps even more) as well - which allows for a much richer experience than texts alone would allow. 

[fab]

Maybe. 

 

Tho i 've not met up with anyone online.

[kimlo777]

In my own case, when talking to an online character, I tend to let go completely.  However, when I am talking in person, I bear in mind much more considerations.  One example is the consideration of respect for the other person.  I am talking to you in person and I know who you are, and because I have a genuine love for people, I will respect you enough not to say harsh words that would hurt your feelings etc.  Whereas online people do not have a 'real' identity to me and I tend to be less careful in my choice of words.

 

And Guest Boy is right in saying that communication consists not only of text and language but also on other human factors.  For example on sizing the person and if I gather that he is suffering from self-esteem and seem to lack confidence, I will definitely be more gentle with him.  If he appears to be a shy and reserved person, I will try my level best not to say things to embarass him or to expose his inner feelings too blatantly. 

 

It is all about the right thing at the right time to the right person.

[sgmaven]

You guys are talking of the etiquette of maintaining your online personality, and not to overdo things with others. However, I am referring to those who put out, suggesting a sort of risque or sexual side of them, which then does not bear out in person. It's like a bottom who claims to like BBC, but in real life cannot even take three fingers in the arse...

 

I doubt it is just due to the lack of proper vocabulary to communicate one's thoughts, so I wonder what drives a person to do this?

[Guest Closet Btm]

Singapore gay circle is so small. Then you have this kaypoh forum with people spying and telling on the naughty gay activities. I'm also worried about my privacy.

I went to Clementi Mall and other cruising places to check things out too. There really are those garang ones who do it so openly. I'm tempted to join in but my good sense told me not to, at least not in Singapore. There's a slutty side of me hidden inside of me that makes me very excited. After seeing their garang actions, I'll go home and use my toys to fuck myself while fantasizing that I'm being fucked there in public.

 

I never meet up with anyone here online because I know we will be reserved once we are not anonymous. It's really hard to open up and say these things so directly to someone in person. In the back of our minds, we are afraid that we may bump into each other again or have mutual friends and our privacy will be exposed. 

 

I want total privacy and the only way to really do it is either in Bangkok or in China. Because these are big places and I'm visiting only for a week or 2, I know I'll be anonymous to everyone. That's when the slutty side of me can come out and play. 

 

But we all know that gay's about looks and body. I trained hard and keep fit because even if I'm giving myself away for free, I still need a good body to sell myself.

 

I've been to Bangkok's cinema and gangbanged by so many men. Me totally naked and surrounded by a group of men, I don't understand what they say about me and frankly I don't care because all that I care that they wear condoms. I don't hide in the dark corners, I choose the bright part and enjoy letting them have a close up view of my butts while I'm being fucked.

 

I've been to parks in Chinese cities and found the Chinese there are even more garang. I'm not the only one there naked. It's not easy to get gangbanged but usually it's one to one or 3P. Still I get the thrilled of being watched and touched while being fucked. This time I can understand what they're saying about me. As expected, it's almost all negative (maybe I'm diseased or ugly) and I'm just a piece of meat.

 

I don't care and even tell them to bring their friends. I just stood there naked and they don't care about the negative remarks as long as I have a good body and they fucked me openly. 

 

I don't care whether anyone here believes what I say here. If you're a slut like me you'll know about these things. Some like to talk cock but in real life are very timid. I'm in between, I'll really slut only when I feel safe to do so. 

 

Some like BDSM, some like non-anal only, everybody has his own fetish. I can't explain why I felt so excited when being mounted doggy in the forest while others watched and passed insulting remarks. I can't explain why I felt so excited when being draped over the back of the cinema chair while being screwed and this old man held up my face to check if I'm so ugly that I'm doing this degrading public sex. He was surprised that I'm not and he joined in the group to grope me right down to my slimy hole. 

 

[Guest 编剧组]

纯属虚构，如有雷同实属巧合

[thorzguy]

Personality aside, some may just talk big, hidden behind the keyboards. The reason being -  "I am not exposed".

When it is time to meet up, then it is a different story altogether because they are not who they claimed to be; or maybe their thinking is "to hell with it, I am here for my lust"...

 

Maybe this apply - talk is cheap /  action speaks louder than words?

[doncoin]

I think our behaviours adjust to the context of the environment. For many closeted guys, I find they tend to do the whole dual identity thing.. I.e. They hide the more outgoing side of them with some people but when they are with a group of gay people who they feel more comfortable with, they are more outgoing. In certain circles, I am more dominant, as in I tend to lead the conversation but in other circles, I am more laid back, preferring to sit back and listen. So it really depends on who the people are. 

[Guest Muscles on a Mary]

Many effeminate gays will also try to portray manliness, or hide their effeminacy in their online personas, showing muscles and all that. They may suceed online, but once you see them in real persons, their "looks", behaviours and manerisms are completely exposed under the light of day. It's like the sunlight shining on a dracula. No amount of muscles or posturing will hide that fact of an effeminate gay man trying to pass off as butch, whether online and especially in real life when you see that person. You would go "shit, she's another one of those muscled maries. Wasted my time"!

[Guest Mutton dressed as lamb]

Deceptions deceptions.

 

It's all part of the business of seduction.

 

She can pile on the muscles (mixed with much visible fats), make up and hair products, but she can never shed off that 浓浓的妖气 or auntie aura given out by her feminine facial features.

 

But just too bad. For baby you were born this way.

[Marbled Meat]

23 hours ago, sgmaven said:

It's like a bottom who claims to like BBC, but in real life cannot even take three fingers in the arse... ...so I wonder what drives a person to do this?

 

Yeah, this is indeed annoying.

 

I can see why insecurity might want to make a Top boast falsely that he is much bigger than real life.

 

But if a tight ass is to be desired, how does being able to take big dicks help market a Bottom? 

 

[Rice60640]

6 hours ago, Marbled Meat said:

 

Yeah, this is indeed annoying.

 

I can see why insecurity might want to make a Top boast falsely that he is much bigger than real life.

 

But if a tight ass is to be desired, how does being able to take big dicks help market a Bottom? 

 

Even a big top like to have fun with a bottom that can take it all. They get tired of hearing "OMG you're too big" or a bottom who cries holy murder after taking one or two inches. A tight ass takes forever to loosen.   

[sgmaven]

47 minutes ago, Rice60640 said:

Even a big top like to have fun with a bottom that can take it all. They get tired of hearing "OMG you're too big" or a bottom who cries holy murder after taking one or two inches. A tight ass takes forever to loosen.   

Correct! Unless you are the sort of person who likes to deflower young boys, most would rather an experienced bottom who is able to relax his anal sphincter sufficiently to take a dick.