What Are Gays Most Worrying Problem about growing old? + Anxiety of growing old (compiled)

[fab]

This is a vicious cycle.

 

Anxiety and getting old.

[AFter8]

4 hours ago, fab said:

This is a vicious cycle.

 

Anxiety and getting old.

Relax... Let’s celebrate life!! 🎉🎉🎉

[Guest Six]

Ts, what is your age? 

 

I also very scared looking into the 

[Steve5380]

13 hours ago, Guest Six said:

Ts, what is your age? 

 

I also very scared looking into the 

 

It should not matter what the age of the TS is.  His thinking is negative at ANY age.

If you live your life well, as soon as you start seeing the losses of youth

you should start seeing the advantages of maturity and old age.

 

Nothing to be scared about.

[Guest Asia News]

9 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

It should not matter what the age of the TS is.  His thinking is negative at ANY age.

If you live your life well, as soon as you start seeing the losses of youth

you should start seeing the advantages of maturity and old age.

 

Nothing to be scared about.

In this little red dot, those people at your age group have been "deleted" long before you know it.  No point covering up just so that you feel good being an elderly.   Reality is the mother of all bitches. 

[Steve5380]

6 hours ago, Guest Asia News said:

In this little red dot, those people at your age group have been "deleted" long before you know it.  No point covering up just so that you feel good being an elderly.   Reality is the mother of all bitches. 

 

If bitching about old age is your reality,  you are not well prepared for the inevitable.

 

The last time I visited your little red dot, I was 70 y.o.  Had I been "deleted"?

Not in the opinion of the young Asians I had fun with in the SG saunas.

 

[Guest Money boy]

14 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

Not in the opinion of the young Asians I had fun with in the SG saunas.

 

Must have cost u a fortune. 

[Steve5380]

10 hours ago, Guest Money boy said:

Must have cost u a fortune. 

 

Yes,  a fortune!  Saunas in SG are not cheap,  and I cannot pass as a junior anymore.  The boys were free, of course,  but I also had to pay for lodging ridiculously expensive in SG.  So I stayed at a suite in this "Queen Resort" of my friend Max Lim, who he gave me a low price. 

 

This is why in the past years I have been visiting Bangkok, a much better value,  staying at the Babylon barracks, with free entry to the sauna.  Sex in BKK is good and free.  Only once in my life I paid a money boy, and this was in Pattaya (also excellent value for the money)

 

[Guest Uncle2]

Never say never, many here are already about 64.

 

 

When I get older losing my hair
Many years from now
Will you still be sending me a Valentine
Birthday greetings bottle of wine

If I'd been out till quarter to three
Would you lock the door
Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I'm sixty-four

You'll be older too
And if you say the word
I could stay with you

I could be handy, mending a fuse
When your lights have gone
You can knit a sweater by the fireside
Sunday mornings go for a ride
Doing the garden, digging the weeds
Who could ask for more

Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I'm sixty-four

Every summer we can rent a cottage
In the Isle of Wight, if it's not too dear
We shall scrimp and save
Grandchildren on your knee
Vera, Chuck and Dave

Send me a postcard, drop me a line
Stating point of view
Indicate precisely what you mean to say
Yours sincerely, wasting away

Give me your answer, fill in a form
Mine for evermore
Will you still need me, will you still feed me
When I'm sixty-four

 

[Guest Young Sweet Thing]

2 hours ago, Guest Uncle2 said:

Never say never, many here are already about 64.

 

 

Huh?  Are you sure? Don't scare the young cutie here.

[Guest Human]

When one gets old, there is no more ambition, no more dream, not much time to chart the next plan . Thousands of dollar spend will not bring back that supple looking skin tone, let alone reverse the wrinkles and receding hair line. People no longer take a 2nd look at you. Your existence is mere nuisance because of age difference between you and the younger geneeatuons. Even the elderly look down on the same elder people too. Age became a dirty word needs to be hidden carefully like a dirty laundry or fear backslash. Old fag is not the only name, but you joined the senior citizens and told you were outdated, not relevant to society. You were constantly told you lack the things youngster possesses. Like energy , quick thinking, mobility and full of future potential. Your presence among them makes you feel odd and sidelined. People expected more from you because you are old but they also rejected you because you are also old. You need to hit the right note for society to accept you. Like walking on the edges of a sword, constantly looking out and balancing yourself to feel less awkward in order to blend yourself into other people expectation of you. But each day and years passes, challenges increased,  your old age signs grew deeper, not helping in your already precarious situation. No matter how hard you tried, you are just wasting time in self delusional mode.  So what now? to accept the world as it is, unforgiving just like the passing of youth that can't be recovered and then life of the elderly no longer take centre stag except to crack like  dried leaves under the fast feet of a new world. Humanity does not include  old people but to leave them to deal with the remaining merciless of time they still have. God forbid!

[Steve5380]

On 2/4/2020 at 6:22 AM, Guest Young Sweet Thing said:

Huh?  Are you sure? Don't scare the young cutie here.

 

64 is middle age today.

 

3 hours ago, Miner1985 said:

When I saw a few grey hair on my head I felt like a grandad, this feeling sucks

 

I am a granddad, and I have all the right to feel like one.  I saw many gray hairs on my head.

 

A few days ago, after taking a shower, washing my hair and letting it dry,

I spent 15 minutes applying on it "Just for Men, Touch of Gray, medium brown 35". 

I applied all of it on my scalp, watching in a mirror that I was covering everywhere, 

then waited 5 minutes while spreading it around with my gloved hands.

Finally, I washed it off, including all nearby skin,  applied some shampoo,  

and after it dried I found out that I had lost at least 10 years from my looks.

 

In a few days I will get a short hair cut from my regular barber, and I will look like new.  

[upshot]

Grow Old Gracefully.

 

If you have done your due diligent preparing for this time. You have little to worry about. If you did not. Make the best of it. Life is a cycle that can not change motion backward. You can make it harder or easier coming to term with it. But you have to deal with it.

 

Let that be the lesson for the younger generation... your turn will come in a blink of an eye.

Edited June 15, 2020 by upshot

[yuquidam]

30 minutes ago, upshot said:

Grow Old Gracefully. .. your turn will come in a blink of an eye.

Ya lor...doc said I should not try not to blink my eyes. It caused dry eyes. But didn't tell doc why I tried so hard not to blink - old is coming leh.

Edited June 15, 2020 by yuquidam

[yuquidam]

31 minutes ago, Steve5380 said:

 

64 is middle age today. I am a granddad, and...

 

A few days ago, after taking a shower, washing my hair and letting it dry,

I spent 15 minutes applying on it "Just for Men, Touch of Gray, medium brown 35". 

I applied all of it on my scalp, watching in a mirror that I was covering everywhere, 

then waited 5 minutes while spreading it around with my gloved hands.

Finally, I washed it off, including all nearby skin,  applied some shampoo,  

and after it dried I found out that I had lost at least 10 years from my looks.

 

In a few days I will get a short hair cut from my regular barber, and I will look like new.  

 

Yeah...we can be as young as we want to be. It's all in the heart. Young or old let's stay healthy, stay safe, stay happy and stay kind. 

[Steve5380]

6 minutes ago, yuquidam said:

Ya lor...doc said I should not try not to blink my eyes. It caused dry eyes. But didn't tell doc why I tried so hard not to blink - old is coming leh. LOL

 

One could say also that old age comes in one heart beat.  But you want to keep your heart beating (slowly, thou)

 

Be confident and keep blinking your eyes frequently.  It moisturizes and relaxes your eyes.  The idea that old age approaches rapidly is not real.  What is real is that with old age, the time passes every time faster.  And this is natural, because we function slower compared to the clock.  

 

3 minutes ago, yuquidam said:

 

Yeah...we can be as young as we want to be. It's all in the heart. Young or old let's stay healthy, stay safe, stay happy and stay kind. 

 

Well said!  We also should stay young for ourselves, not only for others.   Who will care about the color of our hair during confinement?

[yuquidam]

On 2/4/2020 at 8:22 PM, Guest Young Sweet Thing said:

Huh?  Are you sure? Don't scare the young cutie here.

LOL

[Guest Fatty]

3 hours ago, Guest Human said:

When one gets old, there is no more ambition, no more dream, not much time to chart the next plan . Thousands of dollar spend will not bring back that supple looking skin tone, let alone reverse the wrinkles and receding hair line. People no longer take a 2nd look at you. Your existence is mere nuisance because of age difference between you and the younger geneeatuons. Even the elderly look down on the same elder people too. Age became a dirty word needs to be hidden carefully like a dirty laundry or fear backslash. Old fag is not the only name, but you joined the senior citizens and told you were outdated, not relevant to society. You were constantly told you lack the things youngster possesses. Like energy , quick thinking, mobility and full of future potential. Your presence among them makes you feel odd and sidelined. People expected more from you because you are old but they also rejected you because you are also old. You need to hit the right note for society to accept you. Like walking on the edges of a sword, constantly looking out and balancing yourself to feel less awkward in order to blend yourself into other people expectation of you. But each day and years passes, challenges increased,  your old age signs grew deeper, not helping in your already precarious situation. No matter how hard you tried, you are just wasting time in self delusional mode.  So what now? to accept the world as it is, unforgiving just like the passing of youth that can't be recovered and then life of the elderly no longer take centre stag except to crack like  dried leaves under the fast feet of a new world. Humanity does not include  old people but to leave them to deal with the remaining merciless of time they still have. God forbid!

Oh god, please let me die

[Steve5380]

26 minutes ago, Guest Fatty said:

Oh god, please let me die

 

Be patient,  and when Guest Human dies we can forget about that ultra negative, gloomy post he wrote

and look forwards to aging graciously and happily.

[Guest Huge Difference]

5 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

In a few days I will get a short hair cut from my regular barber, and I will look like new.  

Never trust what you see in the mirror.  It can be very deceiving under room light.  Step out of the sun, and you are exactly what you are in age and look.  But it is always good to to feel betrayed by the mirror.

 

4 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

Be patient,  and when Guest Human dies we can forget about that ultra negative, gloomy post he wrote

and look forwards to aging graciously and happily.

"Human" is referring to Singapore society in context.   You American won't understand the life here.  You probably didn't see all the elderly in Singapore, doing dirty unhygienic jobs, cleaning after other people filth,  just so as to be able to put meal on the table, surviving from hands to mouth, not being about to get enough nutrition and seeking medical attention after paying off their bills to the government and hoping next windfall is an occassional gift voucher or cash payout handed to them by the government who will eventually took it back.  Their savings were locked up in the name of "Central provident fund" and at the age of 80, they are still being told to continue working and that CPF is meant to be used for their "future" to age gracefully.   Once they stopped working, they cannot survive, and died for unknown reason on paper and still cannot take out their CPF which belongs to the CPF coffer until someone claim they are related to you. Millions of dollars remained unclaimed todate according to data, which were meant for the person who were already dead, but the policy claims to be doing the "right thing".

 

The next generations will then pick up the stories after them, and the government continue to use the same slogan that older folks having heard for decades, to  enjoy "swiss standard of living", a golden years ahead and being "looked after".    But,  Yes, there is "BUT" , as always, that these elderly must be able to help themself first, being self-reliance, continue to work, upskill, reskill, before the government can help them.   Otherwise, you the elderly, are wasting your time to even thing about wanting to retire. 

[begleitung]

On 12/28/2019 at 9:52 PM, Guest swimming said:

This reminds me. The other day when I went swimming...

 

I noticed this guy swimming next to me - he was doing laps non-stop, body looked very firm, athletic, tanned and smooth and I was admiring his body every time we passed. He was wearing jammers, swim cap and swimming-earphones. From his body and his speed, I expected him to be between 20-30's.

 

But when he finished his swim, he got out of the water and took off his cap - it's all sparse grey-white hair. I got a better look at his face, although he was not wrinkly, I was sure he was definitely in his 50's or maybe even 60's. His body was smooth, muscles were lean, the only thing on his body that hinted at his age, was his thin skin that stretched over his toned muscles.

 

I was in awe and very attracted (and I usually go for guys 25-35.) He looked aloof and that made him even sexier to me. (I'm quite sure he's straight but is aware of the gay admirers.)

 

So... guys, there is still hope. Just look after your body and health, and eat well. Be confident (that's so man), and don't look lusty (cos that's very turnoff). Definitely don't haunt the showers and restrooms (cos that's sick and creepy)

Was he tanned

[mate69]

Just look after your body and health, and eat well. Be confident (that's so man), and don't look lusty (cos that's very turnoff). Definitely don't haunt the showers and restrooms (cos that's sick and creepy) >>>> this part is so true! and very very important to keep in mind too.

 

 

[Guest Radiated Man]

44 minutes ago, begleitung said:

Was he tanned

Being tanned can amplify the age of an elderly man, look at those old man working regularly under the hot sun - looking dried, rough skin and oxidated.   I prefer natural light brown color, even in tone,  sign of health.

[mate69]

yes natural tan is best

dont overkill

[Steve5380]

1 hour ago, Guest Huge Difference said:

Never trust what you see in the mirror.  It can be very deceiving under room light.  Step out of the sun, and you are exactly what you are in age and look.  But it is always good to to feel betrayed by the mirror.

 

 

It is good to look in the mirror and like what you see.   YOU are the most important judge of yourself.   Do it every morning after a good sleep, and smile to yourself. 

 

1 hour ago, Guest Huge Difference said:

 

"Human" is referring to Singapore society in context.   You American won't understand the life here.  You probably didn't see all the elderly in Singapore, doing dirty unhygienic jobs, cleaning after other people filth,  just so as to be able to put meal on the table, surviving from hands to mouth, not being about to get enough nutrition and seeking medical attention after paying off their bills to the government and hoping next windfall is an occassional gift voucher or cash payout handed to them by the government who will eventually took it back.  Their savings were locked up in the name of "Central provident fund" and at the age of 80, they are still being told to continue working and that CPF is meant to be used for their "future" to age gracefully.   Once they stopped working, they cannot survive, and died for unknown reason on paper and still cannot take out their CPF which belongs to the CPF coffer until someone claim they are related to you. Millions of dollars remained unclaimed todate according to data, which were meant for the person who were already dead, but the policy claims to be doing the "right thing".

 

 

I understand life in general, which is not so dependent on the geography.  I have seen what you describe many times,  walking along New Bridge road and adjacent streets between Outram road and Pagoda street in Chinatown many times in the evening and at night,  and seeing many elderly sitting around alone or laying on benches, waiting for time to pass,  and it broke my heart.  Where are their families?, I thought. Don't they have a place to stay occupied,  friends,  a community?    And even if they live alone,  don't they get a pension at 80 y.o. so that they don't have to labor to eat?  WHERE IS ALL THIS FAMOUS SINGAPORE WEALTH ??

 

But Singapore is not the only place where one sees this.  In America there are many seniors who are destitute, especially among minorities.  But this does not mean that one has to expect all the doom Guest Human is describing in his post.   I don't write about the positives of old age just to make me feel good.  More important is to pass on the message that with some optimism that inspires smart living, one can avoid many pitfalls and arrive at old age with an acceptable quality of life.

[raind]

It’s not old age or any age that is the matter but how confident you are... if you can overcome your insecurities, confidence - regardless of age - is really very alluring and sexy.

[begleitung]

On 6/16/2020 at 11:39 AM, Guest Radiated Man said:

Being tanned can amplify the age of an elderly man, look at those old man working regularly under the hot sun - looking dried, rough skin and oxidated.   I prefer natural light brown color, even in tone,  sign of health.

Did not know tan was a turn on or off

[Steve5380]

On 6/16/2020 at 2:48 AM, raind said:

It’s not old age or any age that is the matter but how confident you are... if you can overcome your insecurities, confidence - regardless of age - is really very alluring and sexy.

 

Well said.  And it is best if this confidence is sincere instead of forced, if it comes from the man's belief in his capacity and his worth, backed up by his successes.

 

Successes don't need to be spectacular.  They can build up slowly from wins of the mind over the body,  of winnings of good feelings over the bad ones.

Like going to the gym instead of staying in bed,  studying for one hour instead of giving up after 10 minutes,  not getting upset over some criticism on BW,  etc.

[Guest Man in Brief]

7 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

Well said.  And it is best if this confidence is sincere instead of forced, if it comes from the man's belief in his capacity and his worth, backed up by his successes.

 

Successes don't need to be spectacular.  They can build up slowly from wins of the mind over the body,  of winnings of good feelings over the bad ones.

Like going to the gym instead of staying in bed,  studying for one hour instead of giving up after 10 minutes,  not getting upset over some criticism on BW,  etc.

Wow!! you just broke record.  The shortest explanation by far from you. Keep it up!!

However,  I would  still suggest an even shorter version you should consider:  "Let's not give a shit of what others think."    Save time, save space and paint the same message.

[Steve5380]

34 minutes ago, Guest Man in Brief said:

 

However,  I would  still suggest an even shorter version you should consider:  "Let's not give a shit of what others think."    Save time, save space and paint the same message.

 

Well... it's not exactly the same message, but... "Let's not give a shit together"    

[upshot]

On 1/6/2020 at 4:38 PM, amuse.ed said:

How can the gay community age with a higher

1. Quality of holistic care

2. Dignity

in Singapore?

It starts with the SELF. It can not get any simpler than that. Baby steps and work towards the big steps. This is applies to anyone, whatever your gender, sexuality or inclination.

[upshot]

On 1/4/2020 at 7:55 AM, Guest 花木小妹妹 said:

Just like Hua Mulan lied about herself being a Male.   Fortunately for her, she eventually found her 阿兵哥 through her lying and disguising.  I wanted to be like her. 

 

'Fake it till you Make it' ... does not always work. Bro. Whether that story got embellished over the centuries or not, think thru it logically about life today, you find that is getting harder and harder to BS.

[TT2880]

Hi, 

 

Anxiety arises from 3 situations.

1. when we are not able to cope with what had happened. We get daunted with that past and failed to reconcile with that and we don't know what we can do to change that past. 

 

2. We are scared of what is lying ahead of us. Eg. Some Students gets anxiety attack before their major exams. Before they took their exam, they fear they will not do well. 

 

3. We are not happy and there is something that we are not accepting about our present. We think it should be better but how much better, is then good enough? 

 

When we do not manage this aspects of ourselves well, one could experience many negative thoughts, in which anxiety is one of them. 

[Guest Listen!!]

To cope with aging. DON'T EVER stay put in one place.  Move around, travel everywhere to distract and distort your presence in the view of others.  Each place you visited, you look new to their locals,  you are always new and "not old"  in every new people you met. You will be much happier.   Out of sight out of mind and absence makes others grow fonder of you.  

 

If you aged in one place with familiar people around you, people are l going to judge your changes from head to toe and then cast remarks over little things they see.   Don't you guys get it? 

[amuse.ed]

3 hours ago, upshot said:

It starts with the SELF. It can not get any simpler than that. Baby steps and work towards the big steps. This is applies to anyone, whatever your gender, sexuality or inclination.

I have to agree but self often loose to systematic challenges. Its easy on written in text but to harness self in reality? Tough. 

[koolkai]

On 12/27/2019 at 2:14 PM, Guest Aging said:

A couple strand of grey hair on my brow is noticeable.  My neck showed turtleish wrinkles  when I swallowed food otherwise it is smooth.  No moisturiser can  save what I saw.  There were few darks spots on my hand.  I am scared.  I used  to look youthful until last year.  Now it seems aging started very fast.  Did i use the wrong  skin care products or having exposed under the sun for too long?  I hated aging.  I am not ready emotionally.  I wanted to look young and be accepted.  Heard too many old men being rejected everywhere and in every part of our society. Our society is not ready and unprepared for old age.   I don't want to be part of that group of old men.  I am depressed to think that my life is over and nothing can reverse my youth. We are all depreciating asset like our Hdb.

 

Don't worry! Aging is part and parcel of any human being. Embrace your aging process....we all will aged eventually. You are right that nothing can reverse your youth! Hence, please take care and carry on with your life.

[upshot]

31 minutes ago, amuse.ed said:

I have to agree but self often loose to systematic challenges. Its easy on written in text but to harness self in reality? Tough. 

Because, you are looking from a limited scope encompassing your close circle. Then you look at the world at large and its blasting noises, it seems like there's no hope. That's cause you might not see 'the forest for the trees'. You can't sense others like yourself fighting alongside you over the same issues. Why? Because some issues are just sensitive or precarious to be seen in the open.  Then, everything challenging seem "systemic" this or that. Sometime opposing side shout so loud, you start to feel maybe you have been batting for the wrong team. Lies become truth or truth is now a lie. Unfortunately we are so busy working to earn a living, dealing with personal issues, sex and relationship preoccupation...etc where is there time to fact-check or too lazy to bother because it's not priority enough.

 

Don't give in to overly abused narrative buzz word plaguing the west in present times. Makes you myopic and start to believe you are helpless or a victim more than you think you have the power to make change for you and what beliefs you stand for.. 

 

I don't blame you for feeling the way you do. Bro. Maybe I am old school where I believe the power of one can make a difference. I am not one to sit back and do little even if in my lifetime the result of my personal action/effort does not bring immediate rewards. I know I am not alone and our collective voices are making grounds. I also know what I enjoy today was effort of people long gone who toll to make the difference. I am trying to pay it forward now.

 

Waiting for enough people to stand up before you are willing to stand and be counted, that may be too late quite possibly. But to do nothing is a worst idea than to give it a try.

 

I am in my 50s. Life for people my age way back when? By comparison, we are cruising man today. The pre-ocupation with mostly FIRST WORLD problems, I am sure a lot of the old guys that have passed on or still living in the 80s and 90s would KILL or WISH THEY HAD problems like that instead.

 

People are too soft now in the last 2 decades. Too man snowflakes... causing problems more than solving them.  Even the 'new' old now are more concern about real issues or of life but about getting enough sex in their old age, no young guys want them when they are old, or penis problem...etc. heheheh... I look back today from over 3 decades+, I can tell you LGBTQ for example, has never had it better now (even if some police laws are still not scrubbed from the books) then way back then. Now, it's not about blending in and being ACCEPTED by all on equal terms.

[Steve5380]

7 hours ago, Guest Listen!! said:

To cope with aging. DON'T EVER stay put in one place.  Move around, travel everywhere to distract and distort your presence in the view of others.  Each place you visited, you look new to their locals,  you are always new and "not old"  in every new people you met. You will be much happier.   Out of sight out of mind and absence makes others grow fonder of you.  

 

If you aged in one place with familiar people around you, people are l going to judge your changes from head to toe and then cast remarks over little things they see.   Don't you guys get it? 

 

There are so many nice things about staying put in one place, that to avoid "distort one's presence in the view of others"  is having a wrong priority.  If you want to avoid that, then do some sex tourism and appear in different cities completely unknown and nobody there can compare you with your earlier self.

 

Just recently I lost my 94 year old aunt. She had lived in the same small apartment with her family for over 70 years (!!!), since she got married.  This place was her refuge, her little world full of memories and good feelings.  And I am living now for 43 years in the same house, where I raised my family and later shared it with my bf. It is an old house but has plenty of everything I need, set up the way I like it, and I have no plans to move out,  except by being taken out with my feet first.

 

3 hours ago, upshot said:

 

I am in my 50s. Life for people my age way back when? By comparison, we are cruising man today. The pre-ocupation with mostly FIRST WORLD problems, I am sure a lot of the old guys that have passed on or still living in the 80s and 90s would KILL or WISH THEY HAD problems like that instead.

 

 

I was 50 when I joined the gay scene.  I had no problems finding good sex and good people to have short friendships with.  Thereafter I enjoyed 21 years of a great relationship with my late bf,  which has left me satisfied with a life well lived so far.  And in my 70s I still don't feel a decline in the quality of life.

 

The good condition of the body helps for sure.  But equally important is the right mental attitude,  aware of what is possible and what is not,  looking for good role models to follow and rejecting negative thoughts that come in.  For example,  it is well known that there are good days and bad days working out in a gym.  When young,  one takes the bad days as circumstances that will be surely overcome.  When old,  it is natural to think that the bad days are the beginning of a downturn and everything will go downhill from there.  This is just not true!  Every night we are tired and go to bed.  Every morning we should wake up feeling that the body has regenerated itself during the sleep.

 

I can only judge in myself what I have lived so far.  However, I see cases of people who are in their 80s and 90s and have preserved a good quality of life.  Then in very short time, there is a sharp decline and they pass away.  It does not have to be a slow, progressive loss of faculties with increasing misery.

.

 

Edited June 19, 2020 by Steve5380

[TT2880]

When there is nothing to accept, there is no disappointment.  

When there is nothing to reject, there is no anxiety. 

[InBangkok]

19 hours ago, Guest Listen!! said:

To cope with aging. DON'T EVER stay put in one place.  Move around, travel everywhere to distract and distort your presence in the view of others.  Each place you visited, you look new to their locals,  you are always new and "not old"  in every new people you met. You will be much happier.   Out of sight out of mind and absence makes others grow fonder of you.  

 

If you aged in one place with familiar people around you, people are l going to judge your changes from head to toe and then cast remarks over little things they see.   Don't you guys get it? 

 

Perhaps one solution but frankly it's utter nonsense - with respect to the poster. Firstly, anyone who takes that piece of advice is basically just desperately trying to escape from reality. You don't, because you still grow older. Second, I hope you have a lot of spare cash because it's going to be expensive continuously moving from place to place. Third, making friends is not something you can just turn on like a tap - as readers of this forum will know only too well from a large number of threads. So, you move around and just start making friends at a new place and then - oops - you have to move again!  Not for me, thanks.

[auscent]

Every age group, every era comes with its challenges. Adjust mindset, stock up reserves (eg: health, financial nest, sustainable lifestyle) - off we go to create ur adventures when we age.

[yuquidam]

5 minutes ago, auscent said:

Every age group, every era comes with its challenges. Adjust mindset, stock up reserves (eg: health, financial nest, sustainable lifestyle) - off we go to create ur adventures when we age.

*LIKE* 👍👍👍

[Guest 280]

Getting old is not scary.

 

What's scary is getting old, alone ! You will watch all your straight friends and siblings getting old with their chidren bearing grandkids for them, so they look forward to a fruitful retirement that keeps them occupied with helping to look after their grandkids. They will grow old and eventually die being surrounded by their children and grand children.

 

Thats the scariest part, dying alone.

[Guest Uncle 111]

Just now at a public toilet, an old uncle molested me. I gently pushed his hand away. I left and he followed behind me.

Then he asked me if I'm so and so? I was shocked that he knows me. He reminded me who he was. 

 

He's supposed to be much younger than me. Now he's looking dirty and haggard. He wasn't like that before. He was decent looking and quite nice person. We chat quite regularly when we were active at Hong Lim park long ago. We talked about men but we never had sex before because he only like guys younger than himself.

Now after so many years, he molested me in a public toilet. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. He's already a dirty old man, but I'm older than him, I'm going to become a dirtier old man sooner or later, sigh! 

[upshot]

On 6/20/2020 at 1:50 PM, auscent said:

Every age group, every era comes with its challenges. Adjust mindset, stock up reserves (eg: health, financial nest, sustainable lifestyle) - off we go to create ur adventures when we age.

 

When you have money problems your libido drops down a cliff.... too idealistic to think that if your finances are NOT in order, your cock is still horny. hahahaha..

 

Anyone who think that is possible has not been really broke in their life or too young to know.

Edited June 21, 2020 by upshot

[upshot]

4 hours ago, Guest 280 said:

Getting old is not scary.

 

What's scary is getting old, alone ! You will watch all your straight friends and siblings getting old with their chidren bearing grandkids for them, so they look forward to a fruitful retirement that keeps them occupied with helping to look after their grandkids. They will grow old and eventually die being surrounded by their children and grand children.

 

Thats the scariest part, dying alone.

That's more about you and your inner ear talking. And that all depend on what you have done to overcome that given what you know then if you are gay long ago and not be waiting till now to worry. There are still LONELY  STR8 people who are married and are still alone. There are people with kids but are still alone when they abandon them in some cases. Life does not have guarantees even how SAFE YOU PLAY the game of life. It's easy to think back in hindsight and imagine "what if". That is very easy looking back.

 

But if you are young and I hope you are, learn to find out how you can prepare yourself for what's to come. Stop being a stereotype and do nothing because you "think so' that is what will happen.

[auscent]

6 hours ago, Guest 280 said:

....straight friends and siblings getting old with their chidren bearing grandkids for them, so they look forward to a fruitful retirement that keeps them occupied with helping to look after their grandkids. They will grow old and eventually die being surrounded by their children and grand children.

 

Thats the scariest part, dying alone.

I have also seen old straight frens whose children took inheritance money left to surviving parent; grandchildren who never called grandparents during CBreaker - the same grandparents who fetched them to sch every week of their schooling years.

 

I am not so sure if the price of dying being surrounded by children - grandchildren is a guaranteed comfort.

[upshot]

59 minutes ago, auscent said:

I have also seen old straight frens whose children took inheritance money left to surviving parent; grandchildren who never called grandparents during CBreaker - the same grandparents who fetched them to sch every week of their schooling years.

 

I am not so sure if the price of dying being surrounded by children - grandchildren is a guaranteed comfort.

 

We are just about the only country in the world where we have a Family Tribunal Court for parents of irresponsible children to sue them for support. heheh..

[Steve5380]

5 hours ago, auscent said:

I have also seen old straight frens whose children took inheritance money left to surviving parent; grandchildren who never called grandparents during CBreaker - the same grandparents who fetched them to sch every week of their schooling years.

 

I am not so sure if the price of dying being surrounded by children - grandchildren is a guaranteed comfort.

 

It is not uncommon for financial planners to advise their senior customers of the dangers of having their money taken away when old.  And the primary cause of this is... THE FAMILY!

An old man may not check carefully what his children make him sign.  He may still dream that they have his best interest in mind.

It is also rumored that seniors with a lot of money to be inherited by their offspring are under additional danger of dying early. 

Heirs cannot wait that the old man dies.  Even if they don't consciously plan his murder,  the way they may set things up is so to spare the old man a long and painful decline, ha ha.

 

To die is a private thing.  We all will make this last trip alone.  It may be more important to have good nursing and palliative care than a bunch of family members and friends looking down on one.    And definitely....  NO PRIEST!

 

[Guest Old Timer]

2 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

It is not uncommon for financial planners to advise their senior customers of the dangers of having their money taken away when old.  And the primary cause of this is... THE FAMILY!

An old man may not check carefully what his children make him sign.  He may still dream that they have his best interest in mind.

It is also rumored that seniors with a lot of money to be inherited by their offspring are under additional danger of dying early. 

 

 

That's exactly what happened to that evil Macau gambling magnate Stanley Ho with his 16 children and 4 wives. Though he seem rich and glamorous in the newspapers social reporting but behind his back and in the gossipy forums, he was cursed and laughed at for his deserved family troubles because of his ill gotten fortunes. 

Most people cursed him that this would be his retribution in his dying years AND it happened exactly to script like some well used tv soap opera. It brought solace to many many families ruined by his evil gambling empire and there's karma after all.

If he had given away his money like Bill Gates then he would have redeemed himself but he clung onto them and only gave the token amount just to appear so in the papers.